Dodger Quotes in The Garbage Pail Kids Movie (1987)

Captain Manzini: Did you get the blood of a toad and the eye of a newt?

Dodger: Nope. The pet shop's out of unicorns, too.

Captain Manzini: No wonder there's no magic in the world today. You can't get the ingredients.

Dodger: [starting work unloading a crate] Do you sell much of this stuff? We've only had two customers and they didn't buy anything.

Captain Manzini: Patience is a bitter vine, dear Dodger, but it bears sweet fruit.

Dodger: Huh?

Captain Manzini: That's from the Greek. It loses a little something in translation. Now, let's add a little sparkle to our merchandise.

[hands Dodger a feather duster]

Captain Manzini: Funny people should call this junk, isn't it? When every piece is a diary of the human spirit.

[holds book, looks at inside cover]

Captain Manzini: Take this, for instance. "To my darling Mary, from Herbert." This is more than a book. It's a testimony to love.

Dodger: [holds up teddy bear] And this?

Captain Manzini: Ah, did the child who slept with this grow up to shake the world?

Dodger: [hands Manzini a fold-out fan] Tell me about this, Captain Manzini

Captain Manzini: Ah, an early form of air conditioning.

[waves folded-out fan in Dodger's face]

Captain Manzini: Also, a tool of romance. It could beckon...

[holds fan up to own face and waves toward it]

Captain Manzini: ... or rebuff.

[folds up fan, taps Dodger on the shoulder with it]

Dodger: Did you ever get beckoned?

Captain Manzini: Yes. I also got rebuffed. But like me, this is a relic from a simpler age, when good and bad was black-and-white. And a man could settle all his differences with one of these.

[holds up fencing sword, hands it to Dodger]

Captain Manzini: Then some damn fool invented gunpowder, and a bigger damn fool split the atom. That's when I decided to leave mankind to it's folly and retire here. Into this world of memories

Captain Manzini: [handing Dodger something to replace his dirty clothes] Here, try this on.

Dodger: A dress?

Captain Manzini: Only to western eyes. This is a dashiki, given to me by the great African leader Um-Tuh-Tuh, in gratitude for making his mother-in-law disappear.

Dodger: You were in Africa?

Captain Manzini: Actually, I was on my way back from Egypt. I was doing a split week, Cleveland and Cairo. But that's a long story.

Dodger: [to the Garbage Pail Kids] I don't think you're ugly, exactly.

Valerie Vomit: You wanna suck face?

Rita: Where's the kid?

Tito: [coughs after nearly getting barbecued] He must still be in the car, man!

[everyone watches as the limo departs]

Rita: Oh, that poor little kid.

Dodger: You were supposed to keep an eye on him, Tito!

Tito: [coughs] Yeah. Well, it's hard to watch anything when you're getting barbecued, man!

Dodger: Absitively posolutely!

[after stealing the hot dogs]

Oliver: So when are we gonna eat?

Dodger: We?

Oliver: Yeah. I'm starvin'.

Dodger: Listen, kid. I hate to break it to ya, but the dynamic duo is now the dynamic *uno*.

Oliver: What do ya mean?

Dodger: What I mean is, our partnership is herewith dissolved.

Oliver: But, wait! Wait. You're not being fair!

Dodger: Fares are for tourists, kid. Consider it a free lesson in street savoir faire from New York's coolest quadruped.

Dodger: Yo, Tito, hot wire!

Tito: Hey, no way, man! I've been barbecued too many times!

Georgette: Good luck, Alonzo. I'll be waiting.

Tito: [singing] Heigh ho, heigh ho, it's off to work we go...

Dodger: Hey, keep it down, guys. The game's on.

Tito: Oh boy, Dodger. Tough dog have to get help from a CAT!

Dodger: Hey, Tito, uh, cool it, man.

Tito: Come on, let's see this big, bad kitty fight in action!

Dodger: Hey Tito, LOOK!

[Tito looks away, Dodger jumps on him]

Dodger: This city's got a beat, and you gotta hook into it. And once you get the beat, you can do anything.

Dodger: [singing] Why should I worry? Why should I care? I may not have a dime, but I've got street savoir-faire. Why should I worry? Why should I care? It's just be-bopulation, but I've got street savoir-faire.

Dodger: Picture the city. 8th and Broadway. The crowd's hustling. The traffic's roaring. The hot dogs are sizzling.

Einstein: I love a story with food in it.

Dodger: Enter Dodger, one bad puppy. Not just out for himself, but community minded. But he's not alone. Enter the opposition. A vicious, ugly, psychotic monster. Gleaming claws, dripping fangs, and nine lives, all of them hungry. He came at me, his eyes burning. I knew my time had come. Suddenly...

[Oliver falls from the roof, spooking everyone]

Dodger: Roscoe, Roscoe. Is this us losing our sense of humor?

Roscoe: Nah, I ain't lost my sense of humor.

[Kicks over the TV]

Roscoe: See? I find that funny.

Georgette: Don't you come any closer! I knew this would happen someday.

Dodger: Oh, you've barking up the wrong tree, sister. It's not you we're after.

Georgette: It's not?

[insulted]

Georgette: It's *not*? Well *why* not? What's the problem, Spot? Not good enough for you? I mean, do you even know who I am? 56 blue ribbons. 14 regional trophies. Six-time national champion!

Dodger: Oh, and we're all very impressed. Right, guys?

Tito: Very impressed!

Dodger: You're all right, kid, for a cat. We'll keep a spot open in the gang for ya. Vice president, uptown chapter.

Dodger: Whoa! Chill out, man. I don't eat cats. It's too much fur.

Dodger: You wanna leave? Fine! There's the door.

Einstein: But he just got here.

Dodger: Go on. No one's stoppin' ya.

Dodger: All right, you guys. If Mr. Sykes don't see some cold, hard cash, we are Doberman chow.

Nancy: [to Oliver] Charmed!

Dodger: Oh yes! We're all ladies and gentlemen around here. We're all quality.

Nancy: Now don't you take no notice of them, just because you got manners and they ain't!

[last lines]

Fagin: [singing] Can somebody change? It's possible - maybe it's strange, but it's possible. All my dearest companions and treasures, I've left them behind/ I'll turn a leaf over/ and who can tell what I may find?

[he starts to walk towards London Bridge when Dodger appears behind a post-box]

Fagin: Yes? Young man? And do I have the honor of your acquaintance?

[Dodger shows him a wallet he has just stolen]

Fagin: Lined?

Dodger: Only the best. Lovely workmanship, ain't it?

[Fagin takes the wallet, looks inside and smiles]

Fagin: [sings] I'm reviewing/ the situation...

Dodger: Once the villain, you're a villain to THE END!

Fagin: Your light fingers.

Dodger: Your inspiration.

Fagin, Dodger: What a team!

Dodger: Am I your partner?

Fagin: More a friend. For your talents are employable/ so make your life enjoyable/ a world with pockets open wide/ awaits your whim to grope inside...

Dodger: Collections undetectable...

Fagin: We might retire respectable!

Dodger: Together till our dying day!

Fagin: The living proof that crime can pay!

Fagin, Dodger: I think we'll have to think it out again! Hey!

Dodger: Consider yourself... at home / Consider yourself... one of the family / We've taken to you... so strong / It's clear... we're... going to get along! / Consider yourself... well in / Consider yourself... part of the furniture / There isn't a lot... to spare / Who cares? What... ever we've got we share! / If it should chance to be / We should see some harder days / Empty larder days... Why grouse? / Always a chance we'll meet somebody / To foot the bill / Then the drinks are on the house! / Consider yourself... our mate / We don't want to have... no fuss / For after some consideration we can state... Consider yourself - one of us!

Dodger: [sings] Once a villain, you're a villain to the end!

Fagin: [to Oliver] Delighted to see you looking so well my Dear! The Dodger will give you another suit for fear you will spoil that Sunday one!

Dodger: [Finding Oliver's money] Cor! Look at this!

Fagin: [to Oliver after taking the money] I'll bank it for ya.

Bill Sikes: What's that? That's mine Fagin!

Fagin: Oh no my Dear. Mine! Ours! You shall have the books.

Bill Sikes: You hand it over you old skeleton!

[Fagin reluctantly Bill the money]

Bill Sikes: . That's for our share of the trouble. You keep the books. Start a library.

Dodger: Avoid suspicion, manipulate your friends, and eliminate your enemies.

Dodger: You guys have no imagination. It's like your playing checkers... And I'm playing chess.

Dodger: Even if any of that were true...

[pauses]

Dodger: Who would believe you?

Dodger: Why don't we play the game with school? We're the wolves, they're the sheep.

Mercedes: I don't think they'd all fit in the chapel.

Regina: I hate to be the bitch here but are we going to play, or what?

Tom: Aw, Regina, you love to be the bitch!

Dodger: Alright, alright, everybody put your money in.

Dodger: You guys have no imagination. It's like your playing checkers, and I'm playing chess.

Fagin: What's become of the boy? Speak or I'll throttle you!

Dodger: The traps have got him, and that's all about it!