Det. Stanley Jacobellis Quotes in Gigli (2003)

Det. Stanley Jacobellis: Man, you know what I'd love to do, right now? Go down to Marie Callender's, get me a big bowl, pie, some ice cream on it, mmm-hmm good! Put some on your head! Your tongue would slap your brains out trying to get to it! INTERESTED? SURE?

Det. Stanley Jacobellis: Your door's not thick enough to pretend you're not home when you're home.

Det. Stanley Jacobellis: Larry, it's your mother!

Det. Stanley Jacobellis: Larry, I have a chicken!

Det. Stanley Jacobellis: I know. You don't know nothin'. I can tell, just by lookin' at you.

Det. Stanley Jacobellis: The whole thing's probably alien abduction, like I said before.