Deke Quotes in S.W.A.T. (2003)


Deke Quotes:

  • Deke: We need to sell that shit on eBay.

    Street: I only have one.

    Deke: We'll split the profits fifty-fifty, corner the market. Break 'em down like a shotgun - The Polish Penetrator!

  • Hondo: The reason we're gathered here on our God-given, much-needed day of rest is that we have a Polish hostage.

    Deke: So what if he's Polish?

    Hondo: No, no. Means he's one of those: "Anyone comes in, I'll blow my head off" type of guys.

  • Hondo: [Deke shoots a card] 10 of Spades. Spade flush.

    Street: Hondo, isn't that a straight flush?

    Hondo: Hold the phone. Six, seven, eight, nine, ten of Spades. Deke!

    Deke: Beats four Aces in Compton any day!

  • Neighbor in Alley: Y'all ain't got nothing better to do than to be haulin' off black people off to jail? Just perpetuatin' a cycle you know!

    Deke: [putting the criminal in the police car] Let's see how liberal you are when he breaks into your place!

    Neighbor in Alley: MMmm hm!

    Deke: Mmm hm my ass!

  • Deke: Tell daddy how you want it.

  • [the team's progress is halted by a firmly locked gate]

    Deke: Ain't this a bitch?

    Street: A cold hard one.

  • [after hearing Street over radio yell officer down]

    Hondo: Flip a bitch!

    Deke: Flippin' a bitch!

  • Deke: [Deleted Scene: Locker Room] So my wife's all worried about me workin' SWAT.

    Boxer: They always are at first.

    Deke: [Imitates his wife] "How am I gonna take care of the kids if something happens to you?" So I called to get a little extra insurance. When I tell the chick down there I'm workin SWAT, guess what she does?

    McCabe: Laughs?

    Boxer: Hangs up?

    Deke: She laughs her ass off, AND hangs up.

    McCabe: [as Boxer and TJ laugh] Bitch. Alright guys, take care.

  • Hondo: You know what? I think he might be Polish.

    Deke: Unbelievable.

  • Deke: [hears order board and walks up to it slowly, raising the machine gun and sliding the bolt] This is for my dad, you loudmouth son of a bitch.

    Deke: [after shooting the board, unstraps the gun and hands it to Brett] I don't want this anymore.

  • Deke: Bill, where's my dad?

    Hendershot: [casual tone] Oh, your dad got scrubbed by one of 'em big boys out there earlier today. Tough break, kid.

    Brett: You unbelievable shithead!

    Hendershot: [oblivious] What? What'd I do?

  • Tim: Well I'd rather be partnered up with a foreigner, than with a butt-pirate.

    [Kerry flips Tim off]

    Deke: Well at least you know a butt-pirate's gonna watch your ass.

    [They all laugh]

  • Deke: What's wrong with you.

    Gina Walker: Boobs. Five-point deduction. Breast cancer.

  • Ira Kane: Allow me to share something with the entire class. Last night as I was grading papers, I came across two gems both entitled "Cells are Bad" and both with just one paragraph which I unfortunately committed to memory: "Cells are bad. My uncle lives in a cell. It's ten foot by twelve and he has to read the same boring, old magazine everyday. The end." Although my standards are nowhere near where they used to be I could not bring myself to put As atop those beauties.

    Deke: [points to his brother and himself as he slowly realizes] You're... talking... about our papers!

  • Deke: Ooooh, mucho ecological, Poncho! Mucho ecological!

  • Randy: It looked like it was goin' after the girls.

    Deke: Aw, come on Pancho! You said you sobered up, man!

    Randy: It looked like it was goin' after the girls!

  • Deke: I feel the need, the need for WEED!

  • Jesse: Kind of like us?

    Deke: What do you mean?

    Jesse: We're the rocks, Time is the the water, and we end up being sand

    Deke: Broken Down?

    Jesse: Broken Down

    Deke: Does this mean were still broken up?

  • Deke: When we started this band 20 years ago did you ever think we would be doing it this long?

    Cal: Nooooo

    Deke: What do you think we will be doing in 20 years?

    Cal: I dunno

Browse more character quotes from S.W.A.T. (2003)