Dead Bill Quotes in Bill & Ted's Bogus Journey (1991)


Dead Bill Quotes:

  • [Dead Bill S. Preston almost falls down when climbing around in Hell]

    Dead Bill: Ted.

    Dead Ted: Yeah?

    Dead Bill: If I die, you can have my Megadeth collection.

    Dead Ted: But, dude, we're already dead.

    Dead Bill: Oh. Well then they're yours, dude.

  • Grim Reaper: A hit. You have sank my battleship!

    Dead BillDead Ted: Excellent! Yeah!

    Dead Ted: I totally knew he put it in the J's, dude!

    Dead Bill: Good thinking, Ted.

    Grim Reaper: You must play me again.

    Dead Bill: WHAT?

    Grim Reaper: Um, best two out of three.

    Dead Ted: No way!

    Grim Reaper: Yes way.

  • [during séance. Bill and Ted are floating above Missy]

    Missy: Spirits, can you hear me?

    Dead Ted: Yeah. And we can totally see down your...

    Dead Bill: Ted! That's your mom, dude!

  • [falling down a really big hole]

    Dead Bill: Hey, you wanna play 20 questions?

    Dead Ted: Okay! I got one!

    Dead Bill: Are you a mineral?

    Dead Ted: Yeah!

    Dead Bill: Are you a tank?

    Dead Ted: Whoa! Yeah!

  • Dead Bill: [after seeing hell] We got totally lied to by our album covers, man.

  • Captain Logan: [Being possessed by Dead Ted] Whoa. Okay, dudes... Oh, I mean, fellow policemen. My son, Ted "Theodore" Logan, and his friend Bill S. Preston, Esquire, have been murdered and replaced by evil robots from the future.

    Dead Bill: You totally did it dude.

    Captain Logan: [as Dead Ted] I totally possessed my dad!

    [both Bill and Captain Logan do air guitar]

    Captain Logan: [as Dead Ted] Okay. You gotta go over and arrest these robots so they don't ruin everything for me and Bill. Oh, I mean, uh, my son and Bill. And most importantly, they don't hurt the babes... The princesses.

    [to himself as Dead Ted]

    Captain Logan: This isn't working.

    [to Dead Bill]

    Captain Logan: Back me up dude!

    Dead Bill: You got it dude!

    [Possesses Deputy James]

    Deputy James: [Being possessed by Dead Bill] I totally believe you dude.

    Captain Logan: [as Dead Ted] Yeah!

    [Gives Deputy James a high five]

    Deputy James: [as Dead Bill] Whoa, donuts!

    Captain Logan: [as Dead Ted] Whoa, excellent!

    Deputy James: [as Dead Bill] Savory cruller.

    Captain Logan: [as Ted] Yeah. I got real hungry being dead.

    Deputy James: [as Bill] Yeah.

    [the cops look at them weird]

    Captain Logan: [as Ted] Bill, I don't think they believe us.

    Deputy James: [as Bill] Well, we'll have to find somebody who will.

    Captain LoganDeputy James: [still possessed] Catch ya later, cop dudes!

  • Dead Ted: Bill, what happened?

    Dead Bill: Ted, we're dead, dude.

    Dead Ted: No way!

    Dead Bill: Yes way!

  • Beelzebub: Choose your eternity!

    Dead Ted: Choose your own, you fag!

    [Ted is pushed against a wall by some evil force]

    Dead Bill: You ugly, red, source of all evil!

    [Bill is pushed against the same wall]

  • Dead Bill: [after Bill and Ted have each experienced their own personal Hell] That was non-non-non-non-NON-Heinous!

  • Grim Reaper: I believe Colonel Mustard did it in the study with the candlestick.

    Dead Bill: Sorry, Death, you lose! It was Professor Plum!

    Grim Reaper: I said Plum!

    Dead Ted: No way! You said Mustard! Can we go back now?

    Grim Reaper: Uh, best three out of five!

    Dead Ted: I don't believe this guy!

  • Dead Bill: Best of seven?

    Grim Reaper: DAMN RIGHT!

  • Dead Bill: Ted, it's the Grim Reaper, dude!

    Dead Ted: Oh. How's it hangin' Death?

  • Dead Bill: Ted?

    Dead Ted: What?

    Dead Bill: Don't "Fear the Reaper"!

    [both of them do an air guitar]

    Grim Reaper: I heard that.

  • Dead Ted: Are you sure about this?

    Dead Bill: It worked in The Exorcist. I and III!

Browse more character quotes from Bill & Ted's Bogus Journey (1991)