Darcy Quotes in Thor (2011)

Thor: [taking coffee for the first time] This drink... I like it!

Darcy: I know, it's great right?

Thor: ANOTHER!

Thor: [throws the mug on the floor and shatters it]

Jane Foster: [to the lady behind the counter] Sorry, Izzie, little accident...

Jane Foster: [to Thor] What was that?

Thor: It was delicious! I want another!

Jane Foster: You could have just said so!

Thor: I just did!

Jane Foster: I mean ask nicely!

Thor: I meant no disrespect.

Jane Foster: Alright, no more smashing. Deal?

Thor: You have my word.

Darcy: [On seeing Thor, who's been hit by their car, lying on the ground] Whoa, does he need CPR? 'Cause I totally know CPR!

[from trailer]

Darcy: [staring at Thor] You know, for a crazy homeless person... he's pretty cut.

Darcy: [mispronounces Mjölnir] Myeuh-muh? What's Myeuh-muh?

Jane Foster: Years of research, gone.

Darcy: They even took my iPod.

Erik Selvig: What about the backups?

Jane Foster: They took our backups. They took the backups of our backups. They were extremely thorough.

Darcy: I just downloaded, like, 30 songs onto there.

Darcy: Look! Look, it's "Myeuh-muh"!

[points to a mythology book, specifically a page with a drawing of Mjölnir]

Thor: Hammer! Hammer!

Darcy: Yeah, we can tell you're hammered.

Jane Foster: How'd you get inside that cloud?

Darcy: Also, how could you eat an entire box of Pop-Tarts and still be this hungry?

Thor: You! What realm is this? Elfheim, Nilfheim?

Darcy: [frightened, pulls out a taser] New Mexico?

Thor: You dare threaten Thor with such a puny weapon...?

[Darcy tasers him]

Darcy: [to Jane] What? He was freaking me out!

Darcy: I am not dying for 6 college credits!

Jane Foster: [about the mythology book] Where'd you find this?

Erik Selvig: The children's section. I just wanted to show you how silly his story was.

Jane Foster: But you're the one who's always pushing me to chase down every possibility, every alternative.

Erik Selvig: I'm talking about science, not magic.

Jane Foster: Well, "magic's just science we don't understand yet." Arthur C. Clarke.

Erik Selvig: Who wrote science-fiction.

Jane Foster: A precursor to science fact!

Erik Selvig: In some cases, yeah.

Jane Foster: Well, if there's an Einstein-Rosen bridge, then there's something on the other side. And advanced beings could have crossed it!

Erik Selvig: Oh, Jane.

Darcy: A primitive culture like the Vikings might have worshiped them as deities.

Jane Foster: Yes! Yes, exactly. Thank you.

Darcy: Is somebody else coming?

[the Destroyer approaches]

Erik Selvig: I've got the particle detectors... Darcy, do you have the SHIELD satellite codes?

Darcy: Yeah! Have you seen my taser?

Erik Selvig: It's in the car, come on Jane!

[last lines]

Darcy: Did you choose not to kill me 'cause I've got a wife and a kid?

Victor: No. I didn't kill you because they've got you.

[first lines]

Darcy: [holding infant son] It wasn't meant to be this way, you know? We make our plans, sure. But life... life is what happens to you along the way. You know, first I didn't want this. I didn't want to connect. I didn't want to get involved. But she kept on with me, you know. This is what life is. This is why we're here. To connect. To... to build. We're here to build something. And then we had Theo. And then I understood that... you know, she was right. We're not meant to be alone. You know what she said to me? She said that even the most damaged heart can be mended. Even the most damaged heart.

Darcy: Laszlo fucking Kerick! You made me a douche, Laszlo Kerick. I've seen your hard work. I've seen your fucking pictures. You put Paul in the freezer.

Victor: This has nothing to do with you. I sent you to my apartment to save you. Alright? You were not supposed to go inside.

Darcy: Yeah, but I did go inside. I was worried about you.

Victor: I don't wanna fucking kill you. Take this opportunity and let her go.

Darcy: You lied to me. You fucking lied to me. The godfather of my son!

Victor: Let her go... let her go.

Darcy: You listen to me. You get in your shitty car that does start, you start your shitty car and you drive your shitty car to Alphonsis. We'll be waiting.

Victor: Fuck.

Darcy: He said you're a hard man. Just how hard are you, Mr. Jones?

David Sloan: Um... hard enough.

Darcy: How can I trust you?

Lando Smith: Who else do you have?

[first lines]

Big Red: I'm sexy, I'm cute, / I'm popular to boot.

Big Red, Whitney, Courtney, Darcy, Carver, Kasey, Torrance Shipman: I'm bitchin', great hair, / The boys all love to stare, / I'm wanted, I'm hot, / I'm everything you're not, / I'm pretty, I'm cool, / I dominate this school, / Who am I? Just guess, / Guys wanna touch my chest, / I'm rockin', I smile, / And many think I'm vile, / I'm flyin', I jump, / You can look but don't you hump, / Whoo / I'm major, I roar, / I swear I'm not a whore, / We cheer and we lead, / We act like we're on speed, / Hate us 'cause we're beautiful, / Well we don't like you either, / We're cheerleaders, / We are cheerleaders. /Roll call...

Big Red: Call me Big Red.

Whitney: I'm W-W-Whitney.

Courtney: C-C-C-C-Courtney.

[Courtney makes cat snarl]

Darcy: Dude, it's Darcy.

Carver: I'm big bad Carver. Yeah!

Kasey: Just call me Kasey!

Big Red: I'm... still Big Red, / I sizzle, I scorch, / But now I pass the torch, / The ballots are in, / And one girl has to win, / She's perky, she's fun, / And now she's number one, / K-K-Kick it Torrance, / T-T-T-Torrance!

Torrance Shipman: I'm strong and I'm loud, / I'm gonna make you proud, / I'm T-T-T-Torrance, / Your captain Torrance.

Whitney, Courtney, Darcy, Carver, Kasey, Torrance Shipman, Jan, Les: Let's go Toros. /We are the Toros, / The Mighty Mighty Toros, / We're so terrific, / We must be Toros.

Kasey: Except, it's gonna cost us $2,000.

Darcy: Do I have the letters 'A-T-M' tatooed on my forehead?

Torrance Shipman: I was thinking more D-A-D-D-Y.

Courtney, Whitney, Darcy, Kasey, Missy, Torrance Shipman: [Cheering at the game] Aaaaaaalllll right! We're sweet! We got the whip, we can't be beat. We're the best, our team's too cool. We got the class to rock this school. Aww...

Isis, Lava, Jenelope, Lafred, Courtney, Whitney, Darcy, Kasey, Missy, Torrance Shipman: [Clovers join in, humiliating the Toros] Yeah! We bad, we got the team, we can't be had. We're the best, so score them points. You win the game, we'll rock this joint!

Courtney, Whitney, Darcy, Kasey, Missy, Torrance Shipman: Go Toros! Go Toros! Go, go, go Toros!

Isis, Lava, Jenelope, Lafred: Go Clovers! Go Clovers! Go, go, go Clovers!

Isis, Lava, Jenelope, Lafred, Courtney, Whitney, Darcy, Kasey, Missy, Torrance Shipman: Our game is fierce and we are hip, so get on back, you can't touch this! Our game is bad, we're without peer, so get that weakness outta here!

Isis, Lava, Jenelope, Lafred: Tried to steal our bit, but you look like shit! But we're the ones who are down with it!

Kasey: Courtney'll get captain. The guys love touching her butt.

Darcy: Yeah, she's got a lot to hang on to. What's the plural for 'butt'? On one person, I mean.

Carver: She puts the "ass" in "massive".

[Bends over to pick sometihng up, unknowingly sticking her butt right in Darcy's face]

Darcy: You put the "lewd" in "deluded".

Darcy: Big Red ran the show, man. We were just flying ignorami, for sobbing out loud.

Cheerleaders: [Cheerleaders from opposing team] Hey, Toros! / That's right / The red black and white / Guess What / Guess What / You really SUCK!

Torrance Shipman: Hey...

Torrance Shipman, Courtney, Whitney, Kasey, Darcy, Missy, Jan, Les: That's all right. That's OK! / You're gonna pump our gas someday! / That's all right. That's OK! / You're gonna pump our gas someday!

Darcy: The words "big" and "britches" come to mind.

Whitney: She's crazy. She'll kill us all.

Courtney: Some of us haven't spent the whole summer working out. Right, Carver?

Darcy: Bring on the tyros, the neophytes, and the dilettantes.

Jan: SATs are over, Darcy.

Darcy: And you're still jealous of my score.

Darcy: Remember: They give extra points for alacrity and effulgence.

Kasey: Did we bring those?

Torrance Shipman: We need $2,000

Darcy: Do I have ATM tatooed on my forehead

Torrance Shipman: I was thinking d-a-d-d-y

[Rachel falls on the dance floor in pain]

Dex: Are you alright?

Rachel: Yeah, no, I think I just pulled something.

Darcy: Your vagina?

Rachel: No, I didn't pull my vagina! I just pulled... near my vagina.

Darcy: [to Dex] You liar!

Dex: Are you kidding me?

Darcy: I thought you told me there was nobody in...

Dex: Darcy, you are pregnant! Are you pretending you're the wronged party here?

Darcy: Rachel? How could you do this to me?

Rachel: No, I never wanted to hurt you, Darcy. I never wanted to hurt you!

Darcy: Rachel! Rachel! How could you do this to me?

Rachel: Darcy, I never wanted to hurt you.

Darcy: I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I never want to speak to you again! EVER!

Darcy: [On the phone at the hair salon] You're where? It is one week before my wedding, Rachel, and you're in London?

Rachel: I know. I...

[Ethan shows Rachel what to say to Darcy. Notepad writes 'You're fiancé's a douche.' 'I just need some time.']

Rachel: I just need some time.

Darcy: You're my maid of honor. And you needed time? Are you kidding?

Rachel: I...

[notepad writes 'I'm madly in love w/Ethan!']

Darcy: Rachel, Rachel, the band you picked sucks. The caterer is a nightmare. You need to get back here right now. Right now.

Rachel: Darcy...

Darcy: Right now!

Rachel: No.

[hangs up]

Darcy: Baby I got so excited thinking about next year and Florida state and the future, I think I need to be your wide receiver

Lance: Here baby

Darcy: Well not "here" here, but somewhere here.

Darcy: You're in advertising, Kate: I didn't lie - I sold.

Darcy: That was impressive, I have to tell you. I... I could hardly keep my legs together.

Kate Mosley: I want a billboard in the middle of Time Square. Okay? I want... I want a commercial in the middle of the Academy Awards, and I want a 10-page layout in Vanity Fair - and that's... that's what I want.

Darcy: Yeah, me, too. God, we're shallow!

Darcy: [the camera pans over from a shot of a bottle of champagne and some empty glasses, to Max and Darcy, who are in bed, naked and kissing passionately. She is moaning lightly, but eventually she gently pushes him off her] Alright, Max, wait. I'm feeling a little tense or something. I don't know.

Max Fielder: I'm not finished yet, honey.

Darcy: I know...

Max Fielder: [Whispering] I'm not finished.

Darcy: [Whispering, barely audible] I know...

[Max begins focusing his powers on Darcy, and she begins moaning heavily. Max backs away slightly as, with his telekinetic powers, he sends her into orgasm. She moans loudly, and writhes in pleasure under the duvet as she orgasms]

Darcy: [Moaning] Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!

[More moaning, before her orgasm ends, and her moans turn into giggles]

Darcy: Oh God, Max... Max... God.

Max Fielder: Like that, did you?

[He sits up in bed]

Darcy: [Still flustered] Uh-huh.

[Max chuckles, and starts to put her bathrobe on. He then looks back at Darcy, and begins to work his magic as, off-screen the entire time, she feels another spontaneous orgasm course through her]

Darcy: Oh no... oh no. OH YES! OH! OH! OH! OH! OH! YES! YES! AH! OH! Oh God...

[as she orgasms, Max walks into the kitchen to make coffee. Her orgasm ends, and we get a shot of her, half-off the bed, under the duvet, trying to support herself]

Darcy: Oh, that was the most incredible thing I've ever felt.

Darcy: [Before she can recover, Max uses his powers to make her orgasm again, and we see her wriggle on the bed as it suddenly happens] Oh no, not again! OH! OH YES! OHHH! OH! OH! OOOO! OH! OHOHOH!

[She lets out a giggle of sexual glee. Max begins making facial movements in time with her moans, such as a series of kisses, and finally, a silent scream, which causes Darcy's orgasm to reach its peak. She screams in ecstasy, and we see her fall back onto the bed, as Max finally allows her to stop orgasming]

Darcy: [Panting, trying to settle herself after her orgasms] Wait... wait... Oh Max...

[She giggles gleefully]

Darcy: Mommy...

[She keeps panting]

Darcy: Max, please, what is the matter with you lately? I was kidding.

Max Fielder: Look at my face. I can't go to dinner like this. Look.

Darcy: Your face looks fine.

Max Fielder: I'm not going. I'm staying up here.

Darcy: Max. Max, you promised me that you would try to relax and be close to me this weekend.

Max Fielder: You were only kidding?

Darcy: Oh my God! My God, it's huge, it's a monster! It's a giant boa-constrictor, get that thing away from me, get it away, put it aways before it kills somebody!

Darcy: I'm pregnant. Can you pass the turnips?

Stan: You're light as air.

Darcy: Yeah, so is a blimp.

Stan: But a blimp can't dance.

Stan: [in the labor room] Do the pattern breathing, come on.

Darcy: Screw the pattern breathing, I want a painkiller!

Darcy: How could you name our baby Theodosia?

Stan: We needed a name for a the birth certificate, I asked you what you wanted!

Darcy: It sounds like a greek fishing boat, or a crater on the moon or something!

Stan: Oh no, my wife is not gonna get a job!

Darcy: Oh great Stan, you sound just like Fred Flintstone.

Darcy: I tried on my dress, for the prom, I look like a Thanksgiving Day float. I'm also itchy everywhere, my ankles are fat, there's something hanging out of my butt, the article's not going well and now I have to get a haircut.

Stan: There's something hanging out of your what?

Darcy: Well, when you're pregnant, sometimes you get hemorroids, okay?

Stan: Bummer.

Darcy: [going to the prom] Stan, it took me ten minutes to get out of the car. How am I going to make it on the dance floor?

Stan: Simple, I rented a forklift.

Darcy: Why don't you love me?

Chester: Shh. I love everybody.

Darcy: Why don't you love me differently? Is it because I like to look in your window and watch you sleep? Because I thought we had moved past that.

Darcy: As soon as you're ready to board this crazy-train, you let me know. You let me KNOW!

Darcy: Oh my god. I think these are street people. I saw a whole Sally Jessie on them.

Derek: Oh, dude. That is no street person.

Johnathan: That's the guy from the Color Green.

Darcy: The color what?... What color?

Johnathan: Green.

Aaron: And yea, I'm on your little cherry trick. You tie the knot before it goes in your mouth, right?

Darcy: You know, your engineering class is really starting to pay off.

Darcy: You know what, Aaron? This Barbie doll walks, talks, farts and has hair under her arms and, if you don't like it, maybe you should've gone for the other model.

Norm: What can you do?

Darcy: I know how to shoot people and blow shit up.

Darcy: You're taking a pissa outta my pizza.

Darcy: Well, the Yank soldiers, they told me about these new types of restaurants that they got over there.

Barry Ryan: Bloody mug's game - restaurants - mate. You're up at 5:00 in the morning gettin' the food and still there at 1:00 the next mornin' .

Darcy: Ah, things, they're different. It's... stuff that's quick 'n easy to make. It's identical. It's like a factory.

Barry Ryan: Identical! Jesus, no-one 'll go fer that! You'll go broke in 24 hours. People want choice.

Margaret: What's bouf-head doin' here?

Barry Ryan: Be fuckin' nice, alright? You're not a bouf-head, are ya?

Darcy: I'll go wait in the car.

Barry Ryan: See? I told ya he's not a bouf-head.

Barry Ryan: Hey, Darcy. You know much about Yanks?

Darcy: Yeah. In Vietnam, they were fuckin' everywhere and fuckin' everythink.

Barry Ryan: Then that'd make you a fuckin' expert.

Sal: [watching coverage of Vietnam war on TV in Australia] You see that? *That* is why you need color TV. You see the blood; everything. What is it in black 'n white? It looks old. It's like it happened years ago.

Darcy: [having returned from Vietnam war] It's no prettier in colour, mate.

Sal: No? We love this war. We own it.

Pat: This... is a nightmare.

[last lines]

Darcy: For us all.

Amber: Please tell me those stupid fucking words are his last!

Darcy: Let Him Bleed

Darcy: Make him stop using that n***er dope

Karen: [hesitating to give Darcy a ride home] Can't you ask Eddie Lee?

Darcy: He's in Russellville!

Karen: It's five minutes to your house, another five minutes to the hospital. Mrs. Alves is going to kill me!

Darcy: You promised.

Karen: [giving in] I know I did.