Court Clerk Quotes in Bananas (1971)

Witness: I'm sorry to disappoint you, but I've known Fielding Mellish for years and he's a warm, wonderful human being.

Fielding Mellish: Uh, would the clerk read that statement back please?

Court Clerk: "I've known Fielding Mellish for years and he's a rotten, conniving, dishonest little rat."

Fielding Mellish: Ok, I just wanted to make sure you were getting it.

Judge: You're out of order!

Court Clerk: Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth?

God: So help me, me.

Judge Baker: So help you, you?

God: If it pleases the court, and even if it doesn't please the court, I'm God, Your Honor.

Richard Dice: Will somebody just listen for a second! I can't do this!

Court Clerk: Why not?

Richard Dice: It's absolutely crucial that I devote every day to my career!

Court Clerk: Well, have you got a letter from your employer?

Richard Dice: I could get a note from my mother.