Corbet Quotes in Heaven Help Us (1985)

Rooney: [locked in a dark closet with the others] I think that faggot figured out who did it.

Caesar: [sarcastically] What gives you that idea?

Corbet: Well, what are you gonna tell him?

Caesar: [sarcastically] Let's see, you're sitting in the assembly with a saint's head in your lap. I'd tell him you found it in a box of Cracker Jacks.

Rooney: [thinking Caesar was serious] No, that's no good. We gotta think of something better than that.

Corbet: Hey, Williams, what are you doing?

Rooney: Corbet, shut up!

Corbet: Yeah, but Williams is playing with himself in here!

Rooney: All right, I got it! Listen, this is what we'll tell him when he comes back... We'll tell him...

[not able to come up with a plausible excuse]

Rooney: We'll tell him we don't know what the fuck he's talkin' about!

Brother Constance: Are you familiar with the term "miserable"? Because miserable is what I'm going to make your miserable lives, every miserable minute of every miserable day!

Rooney, Caesar, Michael Dunn, Corbet, Williams: Yes, Brother.

Brother Constance: Yes Brother what?

Rooney, Caesar, Michael Dunn, Corbet, Williams: Yes Brother, miserable, Brother.

[Brother William brings the five into the gymnasium, where Brother Constance is standing in front of the exercise horse]

Brother Constance: That's far enough. Thank you, brother.

[Brother William leaves]

Brother Constance: Gentlemen, we will dispense with the traditional accusation denial ritual. It is such a bore, and not likely to convince me that I don't have before me right now at least one, if not all of the vandals. But since I'm a just man with no taste for punishing the innocent, I will afford the guilty the opportunity to speak now and to save the innocent from an impending state of wretchedness. Well?

Rooney: Could you repeat that, brother?

Brother Constance: [walks toward Rooney] Shut up. All right, who did it? Speak now or you will all suffer for it.

Michael Dunn: I did.

Brother Constance: [walks to Michael] Mr. Dunn.

Rooney: He didn't do it. Uh, Williams did it.

Williams: What do you mean "I did it"? Corbet did it.

Corbet: No, it was Caesar's idea to take the head off.

[the five protests and argue about the incident]

Brother Constance: [impatient and angry] All right. All right! That's enough!

[the boys fall silent]

Brother Constance: Have it your own way, gentlemen.