Coach Punch Cherkov Quotes in The Love Guru (2008)

Angry Fan: Boo! You suck Bullard!

Jane Bullard: No you suck! You can say bad things about me but I won't say bad things about myself! So guess what? You can all just kiss my... Canadian ass!

[crowd cheers]

Jane Bullard: Cherkov, Pitka's coming you have to...

Coach Punch Cherkov: Are you as turned on as I am right now?

Jane Bullard: You're a bad bad person.

Coach Punch Cherkov: I'll take that as a yes!

Jane Bullard: Pitka's coming just stall! Ew!

Coach Punch Cherkov: If I sit like this any longer, I'm gonna pop my dink bag.

Guru Pitka: [picks up Coach Cherkov] I'd like to thank the Academy. Wow, these things are heavy. Yeah.

Coach Punch Cherkov: Put me down, a-hole!

Guru Pitka: [notices Coach Cherkov behind him and freaks out] That little guy scared the crap out of me.

Coach Punch Cherkov: [to Jane] Who is this prick?

Guru Pitka: Oh hello there. Shrimp?

Coach Punch Cherkov: What did you call me?

Guru Pitka: Oh nothing I just wanted to know your gnome... Name! You are a midget.

Coach Punch Cherkov: What's the capital of Thailand?

Guru Pitka: Bangkok.

Coach Punch Cherkov: Exactly.

[punches Pitka in his groin]

Guru Pitka: Omar Sharif, my balls!