Clayton Harding Quotes in How to Lose Friends & Alienate People (2008)

Clayton Harding: [On the phone, calling from New York] This is Clayton Harding, editor of Sharps Magazine.

Sidney Young: Lord Vader.

Clayton Harding: I saw you at my party - just before you ruined it with your pig stunt.

Sidney Young: You liked that, did you?

Clayton Harding: Sure. I especially liked the part where Clint Eastwood beat the shit out of you.

Clayton Harding: [Meeting with Sidney for the first time in Clayton's corporate office] You think you've arrived, don't you? Hate to break it to you, but you're only in the first room. In about a year, maybe longer, you'll discover a secret doorway at the back of the first room that leads to the second. And in time, if you're lucky, you'll discover another doorway in the back of the second room that leads to the third. There are seven rooms altogether. You're in the first. I'm in the seventh. Don't you forget it.

Sidney Young: [nonchalantly] Can I use the bathroom in the seventh? Because the one in the first really smells.

Clayton Harding: Which leads me to the subject of your sense of humor. I had a look through your magazine here.

Sidney Young: What did you think?

Clayton Harding: Felt it was kind of snarky... and bitter... and witless.