Clarice Kensington Quotes in It Takes Two (1995)

Clarice Kensington: I have never been more humiliated in my life!

[turns to walk off and huffs]

Alyssa Calloway: Wanna bet?

[she steps on Clarice's wedding dress so that everyone can see her underpants]

Clarice Kensington: This - is all YOUR fault!

[she raises her arm to hit Amanda, who poses as Alyssa, but Vincenzo furiously grabs her arm and stops her; Clarice turns to him]

Vincenzo: Lady, if you touch that child, I'll pop you one, so help me God!

Clarice Kensington: "Rough" is a broken nail, darling, what I'm having is a *train wreck*!

Mr. Kensington: [entering the bridal dressing room with a Prozac] I knew somebody in this church would have a Prozac.

Clarice Kensington: [snatching the Prozac, impatiently] What is taking so long?

[gulps the Prozac down]

Mr. Kensington: [soothingly] Relax, Clary. Enjoy the moment. This is the happiest day of your life.

Clarice Kensington: [quietly at first, then temperamentally] I'm happy. Don't I look happy? This is me happy! See!

[chuckles, then chants]

Clarice Kensington: Happy-happy-happy-happy-happy-happy-happy!

[bellows]

Clarice Kensington: Let's get this show on the road!

Clarice Kensington: If you embarrass me in front of me in front of all these people, I'll make sure you never play anything, ever, again. Have I made myself clear?

Amanda Lemmon: [as Alyssa] Clear as glass.

[Drops her chewed escargot in Clarice's champagne glass]

Amanda Lemmon: In fact, I can see right through you.

Clarice Kensington: Where the hell is everybody? Vincenzo!

Vincenzo: [to Amanda] I sure hope you've got a plan.

Mr. Kensington: [as he as Clarice take their first few steps down the aisle] Who would have thought my first little girl would be the last to get married?

Clarice Kensington: [chuckles, then exasperated] Aw, Daddy... shut up!

[short huff]

Clarice Kensington: Enough of this.