Chudnofsky Quotes in The Green Hornet (2011)

Chudnofsky: Britt Reid is the Green Hornet!

D.A. Frank Scanlon: Yeah, I know. You hired a guy to kill himself.

Danny Crystal Cleer: How do I pronounce your name? Tchaikovsky?

Chudnofsky: Chudnofsky.

Danny Crystal Cleer: Char... Chudofsk... Chowdofsky?

Chudnofsky: Chud-nof-sky.

Danny Crystal Cleer: Chudnofsky? All right. Chudnofsky, kiss my ass. Put your lips to my ass and kiss it. French kiss it. Tickle it with your grey whiskers. I got bittersweet news for you. You're washed up. You're old. You're boring. You're not scary. You dress like shit. It's over for you, okay. That's the bitter news. Now the sweet news is: You can retire. You can go play golf, eat your dinners at 3:00 in the afternoon, play with your grandkids, drink Metamucil, old people shit. Okay?

Danny Crystal Cleer: [smiles] Look at me. I got a name people can say. My name's Danny Clear. I deal with crystal meth. People call me Crystal Clear. It's easy. Check out my kick-ass hangout here. I got shit loads of glass everywhere. I got a see-through piano. Look at my boys. They're pimped out. We got Gucci, Armani, another Gucci, tailor-made. This is what you need to get to the top today. Not hard work. Not looking like Disco Santa Claus. You need charisma. You look like my Uncle Greg. Very nice guy, but, he's a dentist. Now consider this your retirement letter. Boom. It's over. See your way out.

Chudnofsky: Look, I'm obsolete. I'm a dinosaur. Not in a scary way, in an extinct way.

[repeated line]

Chudnofsky: Now trembled before your death. For be it my mask, or be it your blood, red will be the last color that you'll ever see.

Chudnofsky: Ha! I'm ungassable!

D.A. Frank Scanlon: You brought a gas mask?

Chudnofsky: Of course I brought a gas mask!

D.A. Frank Scanlon: Why only for yourself?

Chudnofsky: You said I'm boring. My gun has two barrels. That's not boring.

Tupper: A grown man wearing a mask is a little scarier than a man wearing a suit.

Chudnofsky: You're not pleased with my suit? Does it not fill you with fear?

Chudnofsky: I want the head of The Green Hornet and I want it tonight.

Chudnofsky: And so, thunder strikes lightning.