Christian Quotes in Poseidon (2006)

[first lines]

Christian: When?

Jennifer Ramsey: Mmm. Today.

Christian: Yeah. When today?

Christian: William, about your decision to go around the Horn.

Bligh: "William"? Not "Sir", not "Captain"; "William"?

Christian: I don't think the men will have it.

Bligh: Oh, the men won't have it. Are they in charge of the Bounty?

Christian: They might be if you insist.

Bligh: Again, would you repeat that please. "The men might be in charge." What are you threatening me with?

Christian: It's not a threat, it's a warning.

Bligh: [sarcastically] Oh, there are rumblings, are there?

Christian: No, there is fear.

Bligh: Around the Horn is the easiest way, the better way, and that is how we will go. Anything more?

Christian: Don't put Adams under the lash.

Bligh: He was insubordinate, cowardly and insubordinate, he frightened the men, I did not put that fear there, he did. So he will be lashed and we will go around the Horn. Are you frightened to go around the Horn, Mr. Christian? Are you a coward too, sir?

Bligh: Three men jumped ship last night. Churchill was one of them. You don't seem surprised?

Christian: Well no, now that it's happened I'm not, I'm not surprised.

Bligh: Well, I must say I'm no longer surprised myself now that I see the example that's being set by my first officer. Just look at yourself, man, look at the way your dressed. Come on, you're no better than one of these natives.

Christian: Well, at least I am no worse.

Bligh: Mr. Christian, I think your brain has received too much sunlight and your body overindulged in sexual excess.

Christian: I have done no more than any natural man would do.

Bligh: No, you've done no more than any wild animal would do. It always makes me laugh that whenever men lose their self-restraint they always say they're "natural".

Christian: They are more natural than men who have nothing to restrain.

Bligh: Mr. Christian, you will report to the ship by sundown tonight.

Christian: No.

Bligh: What did you say? No? Is that what you said? Is that what you said? No? All right, you will report to the ship immediately and you will stay on the ship. There'll be no more fraternizing with the damned degenerate natives of these islands by any of my officers or any of my crew. You comprehend my meaning, sir?

[shouts]

Bligh: Good!

Bligh: [Bligh is nervously waiting for Christian to get him so he won't have to sleep with one of King Tynah's wives] Enter.

Christian: Uh, excuse me, sir.

Bligh: Mr. Christian.

Christian: Sir.

Bligh: What demands my immediate attention?

Christian: Well it could wait until tomorrow, sir.

Bligh: [quietly] What is it, damn you?

Christian: The ship is sinking, sir.

Bligh: Good.

Bligh: My dear God. I had hoped to avoid this.

Christian: Avoid what, sir?

Bligh: Damn it all, man. I'm expected to sleep with her. She's one of King Tynah's wives. A gift from one chief to another, as it were. Now look, five minutes after I go below you must call me up on some important business, all right?

Christian: Yes, sir. What business?

Bligh: Business, damn it; any bloody business.

Christian: I am in hell! Hell, sir! Why are you being so damn reasonable now? Goddamn your blood to hell with mine, sir! Goddamn your blood!

Bligh: Mr. Christian, get a hold of yourself!

Christian: You will be quiet or I will run you through!

Seaman Matthew Quintal: Do it, Christian! Kill him!

Christian: Just shut your mouth! You shut your mouth! I will run you through and then I will kill myself after. You get him dressed now! Get him dressed!

Edward Young: [after Heywood falls on his seat and bumps into Christian] Striking a superior officer.

Thomas Heywood: No, I didn't.

Christian: It's a hanging offence, sir.

Thomas Heywood: [nervous] Sorry, sir.

Christian: Can't be helped. We shall get to know each other pretty closely, I believe.

Edward Young: I wonder we shall find out.

Christian: Depends on how inquisitive are, Mr. Young.

Bligh: [shouting] Filth, sir! Filthy, Mr. Christian! Still filthy! Look!

Christian: I see nothing, sir, but your finger.

Bligh: [shouting] I'll not have your vile ways brought aboard my ship, sir! Do you understand? Now you'll call up the swabbing party yet again! And this time you will make bloody sure that the decks are clean, or by God you will answer for it, sir! I'll not have any of your foul, filthy, gutter ways on board my ship! Do you understand? Good God, pigs in a sty have more comprehension of cleanliness than you buggers have! Now you'll get these decks clean, or by God I'll make you lick them clean with your tongue if you don't mend your ways!

Christian: I am in hell, sir! I am in hell!

Bligh: Do you really think you'll be able to command this rabble?

Christian: I'll do my best.

Bligh: Well I did my best, and I had the authority of the law. You're a dead man Fletcher.

Christian: [in his log] I am committed to a desperate enterprise. I have said farewell to everything I've been accustomed to regard as indispensable. But I suppose I have found freedom.

Edward Young: [after seeing Christian improvising a raft to escape the ship at night] That isn't a raft, it's a coffin. There's a five-knot current running between us and that island.

Christian: I'll take my chance.

Edward Young: You think a lot of us haven't thought of this? You're not the only one to have left a woman behind. Fletcher, the men are ready for anything.

Christian: What are you saying, Ned? Are you inciting me to mutiny?

Edward Young: If I were you, I'd take the ship. That's all.

Christian: Why don't you, then?

Edward Young: I said if I were you. I'm not.

John Fryer: Captain Bligh is surprised that he hasn't had the pleasure of your company at supper for some weeks.

Christian: Do you still do that?

John Fryer: And the Captain said he'd expect you this evening.

Christian: Well, today... today is not Friday.

John Fryer: Six o'clock. Prompt, if you please.

[first lines]

Christian: [voice-over] Hayden Technologies... Birthplace of what was supposed to be our greatest scientific breakthrough.

Roxane: Speak. I'll listen.

Christian: I love you.

Roxane: Yes, talk to me of love.

Christian: I love you.

Roxane: That's your theme. Embroider it. Embroider it. Embroider it!

Christian: I love you so much.

Roxane: Yes. And then?

Christian: And then... I'd love you to love me. Tell me you love me.

Roxane: You give me milk instead of cream. Say how you love me.

Christian: I love you... so much!

Roxane: Unravel your feelings!

Christian: Your throat! I want to kiss it!

Roxane: Christian!

Christian: I love you.

Roxane: Again?

Christian: No... I don't love you.

Roxane: That's better.

Christian: I worship you.

Roxane: Oh no.

Christian: I'm tired of being my own rival.

Tai: Do you think she's pretty?

Cher: No, she's a full-on Monet.

Tai: What's a monet?

Cher: It's like a painting, see? From far away, it's OK, but up close, it's a big old mess. Let's ask a guy. Christian, what do you think of Amber?

Christian: Hagsville.

Cher: See?

Christian: Do you like Billie Holiday?

Cher: I love him.

Mel: You drink?

Christian: No, thanks. I'm cool.

Mel: I'm not offering. I'm asking you if you drink. You think I offer alcohol to teenage drivers taking my daughter out?

Christian: Hey man, the protective vibe. I dig.

Cher: Oh look, Josh is dancing with Tai, he never dances.

Christian: I can see why.

Christian: Nice stems.

Christian: Thanks, man. You got my mark.

Christian: Oh honey, you baked.

Cher: I tried.

Tanner Daniels: You're doing it again.

Fawcett Brooks: What?

Tanner Daniels: That noise girls make when they see two gay guys together.

Christian: Yeah, it's the same annoying sound people make when they see cute animals dressed in human clothes.

Fawcett Brooks: "Ew." "Gross." "Barf." Is that better?

Christian: Much.

Johnny: "Lovelock?" Where the hell is Lovelock?

Christian: Lovecock? Johnny, that's your hometown, isn't it? You love cock.

Christian: You know it's a myth, don't ya?

Miranda: What?

Christian: Love... it's just an incentive to propagate the species.

Christian: Did she tell you the one about the dog? It wasn't her father who did that. It was me... Pooor Rex.

Christian: We need a fluffer out here.

[first lines]

Christian: [casually to person answering the door] Hi.

Christian: The greatest thing you'll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return.

Satine: Besides, I can't fall in love with anyone

Christian: Can't... fall... in love? But, a life without love, that's... terrible...

Satine: No, being on the street, that's terrible.

Christian: No! Love is like oxygen!

Satine: What?

Christian: Love is a many splendored thing. Love lifts us up where we belong. All you need is love!

Christian: [bursts out into song]

[last lines]

Christian: [voiceover and typing] Days turned into weeks, weeks turned into months. And then, one not-so-very special day, I went to my typewriter, I sat down, and I wrote our story. A story about a time, a story about a place, a story about the people. But above all things, a story about love. A love that will live forever. The End.

Christian: [voiceover, singing] The greatest thing you'll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return.

Christian: [singing] Why does my heart cry? Feelings I can't fight... you're free to leave me, but just don't deceive me, and please believe me when I say I love you!

Christian: [to the Duke] This woman is yours now. I've paid my whore.

[to Satine]

Christian: I owe you nothing. And you are nothing to me. Thank you for curing me of my ridiculous obsession with love.

Christian: It's a little bit funny.

Satine: What?

Christian: This feeling inside. I'm not one of those who can easily hide. Is this ok? Is this what you want?

Satine: Ah, poetry. Yes, this it what I want naughty words.

Christian: I don't have much money but boy if I did, I'd buy a big house where we both could live. If I were a sculptor, but then again, no. Or a man who makes potions a traveling show. I know it's not much...

Satine: Oh Naughty, don't stop, don't stop.

Christian: But it's the best I can do.

[sings]

Christian: My gift is my song. And this one's for you. And you can tell everybody that this is your song. It may be quite simple but now that it's done. I hope you don't mind, I hope you don't mind that I put down in words... how wonderful life is now you're in the world.

Satine: I'm sorry, Christian, I'm dying.

Christian: No, you'll be alright

Satine: I'm so sorry, Christian. I'm sorry.

[brief pause]

Satine: I'm cold. Hold me.

[long pause]

Satine: You've got to carry on without me, Christian.

Christian: I can't carry on without you.

Satine: You have so much to give.

Christian: No.

Satine: Ye. Tell our story, Christian.

Christian: I love you.

Satine: [smiles] Tell our story, Christian, that way I'll always be with you.

Christian: Days turned into weeks, weeks turned into months, and then on not-so very special day, I sat down at my type-writer and I wrote down our story. A story about a time, a story about a place, a story about the people. But most importantly, a story about love. A love that will live forever. The end.

The Duke: I don't like this ending...

Zidler: Don't like the ending, my dear Duke?

The Duke: Why should the courtesan chose the penniless sitar player over the maharajah who is offering her a lifetime of security? That's real love. Once the sitar player has satisfied his lust he will leave her with nothing. I suggest that the courtesan chose the maharajah.

Toulouse-Lautrec: But, but tell me, that ending does not uphold the Bohemian ideals of truth, beauty, freedom, and...

The Duke: [shouts] I don't care about your ridiculous dogma! Why shouldn't the courtesan chose the maharajah?

Christian: [shouts] Because she doesn't love you!... Him... Hi-him, she doesn't love... she doesn't love him.

The Duke: Oh, I see... Monsieur Zidler, the play will be rewritten with the courtesan choosing the maharajah and without the lovers' secret song. It will be rehearsed in the morning, ready for the opening tomorrow night...

Zidler: But, my dear Duke, that will be quite impossible.

Satine: Harold, the Duke is being treated appallingly. These silly writers let their imaginations run away with themselves. Why don't you and I have a little supper, and then we can tell Monsieur Zidler how we would like the story to end.

Christian: Wait. No, please wait. Before, when we were... when you thought I was the Duke, you said that you loved me, a- and I wondered if...

Satine: It was just an act?

Christian: Yes.

Satine: Of course.

Christian: Oh. It just felt real.

Satine: Christian, I'm a courtesan. I'm paid to make men believe what they want to believe.

Christian: India! India! It's set in India! And there's a courtesan, the most beautiful courtesan in all the world.

[Turns to the Duke]

Christian: But her kingdom's invaded by an evil Maharaja! Now, in order to save her kingdom, she has to seduce the evil Maharaja. But on the night of the seduction, she mistakes a penniless po- a penniless- a penniless sitar player for the evil Maharaja and she falls in love with him!

[turns to Satine]

Christian: He wasn't trying to trick her or anything, but he was dressed as a Maharaja because... he's appearing in a play!

Christian: The Moulin Rouge. A night club, a dance hall and a bordello. Ruled over by Harold Zidler. A kingdom of night time pleasures. Where the rich and powerful came to play with the young and beautiful creatures of the underworld. The most beautiful of these was the one I loved. Satine. A courtesan. She sold her love to men. They called her the "Sparkling Diamond", and she was the star... of the Moulin rouge. The woman I loved is... dead.

Satine: I can't believe it. I'm in love. I'm in love with a young, handsome, talented duke.

Christian: Duke?

Satine: Not that the title's important, of course.

Christian: I'm not a duke.

Satine: Not a duke?

Christian: I'm a writer.

Satine: A writer?

Satine: A little supper? Maybe some champagne?

Christian: I'd rather, um, just get it over and done with.

Satine: Hmph. Oh. Very well. Then why don't you come down here and let's get it over and done with.

Christian: I prefer to do it standing.

Satine: Oh.

[starts to stand]

Christian: You don't have to stand, I mean. It's sometimes that... It's quite long and I'd like you to be comfortable. It's quite modern what I do and it may feel a little strange at first, but I think, if you're open, then you might enjoy it.

Christian: [v.o] Luckily, right at that moment, an unconscious Argentinean fell through my roof.

[With a loud crash, the Narcoleptic Argentinean falls through the ceiling]

Christian: [v.o] He was quickly joined by a dwarf dressed as a nun.

The Duke: Why shouldn't the courtesan go for the maharajah?

Christian: Because she doesn't love you. Him... hi... him... sh... she doesn't love... him...

Christian: [singing] His eyes upon your face. His hand upon your hand. His lips caress your skin. It's more than I can stand!

Christian: Mademaiselle Satine, I haven't quite finished writing that new scene. The "Will The Lovers Be Meeting at the Sitar Player's Humble Abode" scene. And I wondered if I could work on it with you later tonight.

The Duke: But, my dear, I've arranged a magnificent supper for us in the Gothic Tower.

Christian: It's not important. We could work on it tomorrow.

Satine: Oh, how dare you! It cannot wait until tomorrow. The "Lovers Will Be Meeting in the Sitar Player's Humble Abode" scene is the most important in the production. We will work on it tonight until I am completely satisfied.

The Duke: B-But my dear...

Satine: Dear Duke. Excuse me.

Christian: [smiles] I'm sorry.

Christian: [singing] Sat on the roof/ and I kicked off the moss/ and some of these verses, well they/ they've got me quite cross/ but the sun's been kind/ while I wrote this song/ It's for people like you that/ keep it turned on/ so excuse me forgetting/ but these things I do/ you see I've forgotten if they're green or they're blue/ the whole thing is/ what I really mean/ your's are the sweetest eyes/ I've ever seen .

Christian: Where were you last night?

Satine: I told you... I was sick.

Christian: You don't have to lie to me.

Satine: We have to end it. Everybody knows. Harold knows. Sooner or later the Duke will find out.

Christian: Tell me the truth.

Satine: The truth? The truth is that I am the Hindu courtesan... and I choose the maharajah.

Christian: Then I'll write a song and we'll put it in the show and whenever you sing it or hear it. Or whistle or hum it then you'll know. It'll mean that we love one another.

Satine: [enters Christian's loft in hysterics] Oh, thank goodness!

[she hugs Christian and begins crying]

Satine: I couldn't! I couldn't go through with it! I saw you there and I felt differently! I couldn't pretend!

[sobbing]

Satine: And the Duke he saw! He saw and he-Christian, I love you.

[continues to hug him]

Christian: [quietly] It's okay.

Satine: [sobbing] I couldn't deal with it! I don't want to pretend anymore! I didn't want to lie! I don't -

[takes a breath and calms down]

Satine: And he knows! He knows and he saw you!

Christian: That's all right. You don't have to pretend anymore. We'll leave. We'll leave tonight.

Satine: Leave? Wh-the show wh-?

Christian: I don't care. I don't care about the show. We have each other. That's all that matters.

Satine: Yes. As long as we have each other. We have each other.

[they kiss]

Christian: [turns to Chocolat] Chocolat. Take Miss Satine to her dressing room and get the things she needs. No one must see you. Do you understand?

Le Chocolat: I understand.

Christian: [to Satine] Now darling you go and pack, and I'll be waiting.

[he wraps his coat around Satine and gives her a final kiss]

Toulouse-Lautrec: How do you do? My name is Henri Marie Raymond Toulouse-Lautrec Montfa.

Christian: What?

Toulouse-Lautrec: I'm terribly sorry about all this. We're just upstairs rehearsing a play.

Christian: What?

Christian: We were off to the Moulin Rouge and I was to perform my poetry for Satine.

Christian: How could I know... in those last fatal days... that a force darker than jealousy... and stronger than love; had began to take hold of Satine...

Zidler: Where is she?

Christian: I've come to pay my bill.

Christian: I had come to write about truth, beauty, freedom, and that which I believed in above all things: love.

Christian: [singing] The courtesan and sitar man are pulled apart by an evil plan...

Satine: [singing] but in the end she hears his song...

Christian: [singing] and their love is just too strong.

The Duke: [singing] It's a little bit funny, this feeling inside.

Toulouse-Lautrec: Things aren't always as they seem.

Christian: Things are exactly the way they seem.

Christian: Would... you... fuck... him?

Tara: No... I... wouldn't.

Christian: I don't believe what you believe but I know you believe it. So just be honest with me, and you have to promise me not to kill anyone, okay?

Christian: If you hit them hard enough the first time they won't dare to hit you again.

[last lines]

Christian: Can't wait until you back at school.

Elias: Me too.

Christian: [after testing some explosives] Fuck! That was sick! Imagine if we use one of the big ones. His car will be blown to pieces.

Elias: Whose car?

Christian: That asshole, Lars.

Elias: You want to blow up his car?

Christian: Sure.

Elias: Someone will find out. A car is really expensive.

Christian: Your dad will be pleased.

Elias: I'm not so sure.

Christian: Doesn't matter. No one will find out. Are you in or out?

Elias: I'm not sure...

Christian: If you're not in, I would like my knife back right now.

Cincinnati Kid: Listen, Christian, after the game, I'll be The Man. I'll be the best there is. People will sit down at the table with you, just so they can say they played with The Man. And that's what I'm gonna be, Christian.

Christian: I know.

Christian: [Voice-over] Should it ever befall me, and it could happen today, to be a victim of the terrorism swallowing up all foreigners here, I would like my community, my church, my family, to remember that my life was given to God and to this country. That the Unique Master of all life was no stranger to this brutal departure. And that my death is the same as so many other violent ones, consigned to the apathy of oblivion. I've lived enough to know, I am complicit in the evil that, alas, prevails over the world and the evil that will smite me blindly. I could never desire such a death. I could never feel gladdened that these people I love be accused randomly of my murder. I know the contempt felt for people here, indiscriminately. And I know how Islam is distorted by certain Islamism. This country, and Islam, for me are something different. They're a body and a soul. My death, of course, will quickly vindicate those who call me naïve or idealistic, but they must know that I will be freed of a burning curiosity and, God willing, will immerse my gaze in the Father's and contemplate with him his children of Islam as he sees them. This thank you which encompasses my entire life includes you, of course, friends of yesterday and today, and you too, friend of the last minute, who knew not what you were doing. Yes, to you as well I address this thank you and this farewell which you envisaged. May we meet again, happy thieves in Paradise, if it pleases God the Father of us both. Amen. Insha'Allah.

Christian: We are martyrs out of love, out of fidelity. If death overtake us, despite ourselves, because up to the end, up to the end we'll try to avoid it. Our mission here is to be brothers to all. Remember that love is eternal hope. Love endures everything.

[last lines]

Christian: She's here... don't go Megan...

[on seeing Malin]

Christian: No... No

[flees as she chases him]

Christian: It was an accident! MALIN... Megan... I'm really sorry

Christian: FYI... Jesus is your Savior... not your homeboy!

Christian: What the hell is happening?

Mark: [behind the wheel] Let's taste the goodies...

[Kristian hands Mark a beer - Mark studies the label]

Mark: Ã…bro Original...

[tastes the beer and makes a face]

Mark: Fy Fan!

Christian: Is it bad?

Mark: I've eaten pussy that tasted better.

Seph Copeland: You ever stare one of them in the eyes?

Christian: I never stuck around long enough.

Seph Copeland: Well they're lifeless, cause there's nothing there. Kinda like a shark, you know. They do one thing and they do it well.

Christian: You just gotta believe - you can have anything you want!

Christian: Mr. Storz, can I speak to you?

Mr. Storz: No. Out you can go. Out you may go. Out you should go. Get out!