Chic Quotes in Shall We Dance (2004)

Bobbie: So why did you all start dancing?

Vern: I'm getting married in September. My bride said she'd like to see me lose a few pounds, thought the dancing might be good exercise. I told her it wouldn't work.

[waitress gives him a hamburger and fries]

John Clark: I think you're gonna win that bet.

Chic: I'm here for the ladies, you know what they say about guys that can dance...

Bobbie: Yeah, that they're great in bed.

Chic: Right.

Bobbie: Where do you hear this crap?

Chic: Everywhere, everywhere the guys that can dance get the pick of the litter.

Bobbie: I'm here for the big dance competition. All I need is a partner.

[to John]

Bobbie: so that leaves you.

John Clark: What?

Bobbie: You're the only one that hasn't said why you're dancing.

John Clark: I'm dancing for exercise like Vern.

Bobbie: Bull.

John Clark: Because I'm lousy in bed like Chic. There I said it.

[Earl is on the phone with Chic, the locksmith, and Vic is listening on the other line]

Earl Keese: Hello, Chic? It's Earl.

Chic: Earl! Earl who?

Earl Keese: Hey, no jokes, will ya? I need the name of that locksmith you used that time. I broke a key off. I got two lunatics locked in my basement.

Vic: [makes unintelligible noises]

Chic: What? What did you say?

Vic: [disguising voice] I said blow it out your ass, wimp.

Chic: Is somebody on this line?

Vic: Just you and me, asshole.

Earl Keese: [to Enid] That bastard's on the phone!

Chic: Well you called me, didn't ya?

Earl Keese: Not you!

Vic: Me!

Earl Keese: Get off the line, Vic!

Chic: Who's Vic?

Earl Keese: He lives next door.

Vic: Nobody lives next door, Earl!

Chic: That's right!

Earl Keese: Christ.

Vic: Earl, have you been drinking?

Chic: What the hell is going on?

Earl Keese: Never mind, forget it!

Vic: And don't ever call here again!

[click]