Chi Fu Quotes in Mulan (1998)
Chi Fu Quotes:
Shang: Let me see your conscription notice.
Shang: Fa Zhou? The Fa Zhou?
Chi Fu: I didn't know Fa Zhou had a son.
Mulan: Well, he doesn't talk about me much.
[Tries to spit, but ends up with a glop of spit hanging from her lip]
Chi Fu: I can see why. The boy is an absolute lunatic.
Chi Fu: [singing] I've a girl at home who's unlike any other...
Yao: [singing in whisper to Mulan] Yeah, the only girl who'd love him is his mother.
Chi Fu: Insubordinate ruffians! You men owe me a new pair of slippers! And I do not squeal like a girl.
[a panda eats his slipper; he squeals like a girl]
Mushu: [disguised as a messenger riding the panda] Urgent news from the General.
Mushu: What's the matter? Never seen a black-and-white before?
Chi Fu: Who are you?
Mushu: Excuse me? I think the question is, who are *you!* We're in a war, man! There's no time for stupid questions! I should have your hat for this, snatch it *right* off your head. But I'm feeling gracious today, so carry on before I report you.
Chi Fu: Order. People, order.
Citizen: I'll have a pan-fried noodle.
Chien-Po: Ooh, ooh, sweet-and-pungent shrimp.
Citizen: Moo goo gai pan.
Chi Fu: That's not funny.
Fa Zhou: I am ready to serve the emperor.
Mulan: Father! You can't go!
Fa Zhou: Mulan!
Mulan: Please, sir. My father has already fought for...
Chi Fu: Silence! You would do well to teach your daughter to hold her tongue in a man's presence.
Fa Zhou: Mulan, you dishonor me.
Chi Fu: Be careful, Captain. The General may be your father, but I am the Emperor's counsel. Oh, and by the way, I got that job on my own.
[Li Shang walks out of his tent and passes Mulan]
Mulan: Hey. I'll hold him, and you punch!
Shang: What's your name?
Mulan: Uh... I, I, uh...
Chi Fu: Your commanding officer just asked you a question.
Mulan: Uh, I've got a name. Ha! And it's a boy's name, too.
Mushu: [whispering in Mulan's ear] Ling. How 'bout Ling?
Mulan: [looking toward Ling] His name is Ling.
Shang: I didn't ask for *his* name. I asked for *yours!*
Mushu: Try, uh, uh, ah, Chu.
Mulan: Ah Chu.
Shang: Ah Chu?
Mushu: [chuckles] I kill myself.
Shang: Then what is it?
Mushu: Ping! Ping was my best friend growin' up.
Mulan: It's Ping.
Mushu: Of course, Ping did steal my girl...
[Mulan muffles him]
Mulan: Yes, my name is Ping.
Shang: Captain Li Shang. Hm. Leader of China's finest troops. No, the greatest troops of all time.
[exits his tent to find the troops fighting each other; we see one soldier with a black eye salute Shang, then promptly faint]
Chi Fu: Most impressive.
The Emperor of China: Chi Fu.
Chi Fu: Your Excellency?
The Emperor of China: [indicating Mulan] See to it that this woman is made a member of my council.
Chi Fu: A member of... what?
Chi Fu: But... there are no council positions open, your Majesty.
The Emperor of China: Very well.
The Emperor of China: [to Mulan] You can have HIS job.
[Chi Fu faints]
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