Charlie Schumacher Quotes in The Mask (1994)

[last lines]

Stanley Ipkiss: [on a bridge with Tina, holding the mask in his hand] You sure you're not gonna miss this guy? Once he's gone, all that's left is me.

[Without a word, Tina takes it from him and throws it into the water, then grabs and kisses him. Meanwhile, Charlie, watching them, gets out of the car and rushes over to the edge of the bridge to look for the mask. It's floating in the water, so he climbs over the railing and jumps in... ]

Charlie Schumacher: [seeing Milo swimming off with the mask] MILO!

[Meanwhile... ]

Stanley Ipkiss: [a wide grin on his face] SSSMOKIN'!

[He grabs Tina and kisses her... ]

Charlie Schumacher: [referring to Tina] A girl like that is always looking for the BBD: Bigger Better Deal.

Stanley Ipkiss: You don't know that, Charlie. She's an artist. She's... she's sensitive.

Charlie Schumacher: Stanley, forget her. That girl will tear your heart out, put it in a blender and hit "frappe." You don't need her, man. You need somebody a little more down to earth. Somebody with some integrity. Somebody with

[sees Peggy]

Charlie Schumacher: red hair and full pouty lips, a white blouse, a green jacket and a name tag.

Stanley Ipkiss: Boy, you really narrowed it down.

Maggie: Stanley, you are the nicest guy. Really, you are.

Stanley Ipkiss: Yeah?

Maggie: Charlie, isn't Stanley the nicest guy?

Charlie Schumacher: The best.

[Maggie walks off]

Charlie Schumacher: That was THE most sickening display I've ever seen.

Stanley Ipkiss: I disagree. I think I'm wearing her down.

Charlie Schumacher: [after Stanley snaps at Dickey] Genius. That was genius. Buddy, I have chills! What side of whose bed did you wake up on, man?

Charlie Schumacher: The Coco Bongo Club. Hottest new joint in town. Only the creme de la creme need apply.

Stanley Ipkiss: So how do we get in?

Charlie Schumacher: [after Mr. Dickey leaves] Gee, I wish MY daddy owned a bank. Then I could be a rich little creep too.

[after Stanley defeats Dorian, Charlie runs in with police reinforcements]

Charlie Schumacher: Officers, arrest those men! I always wanted to say that.

Charlie Schumacher: [privately debunking his ladies-man reputation to Jerry] I'll bet you and me are the only two guys in the dorm who've never been laid.