Chance the Gardener Quotes in Being There (1979)

Chance the Gardener: I like to watch.

Dennis Watson: You know, I've never met anyone like you in Washington before.

Chance the Gardener: Yes, I've been here all my life.

Dennis Watson: Really? And uh, where have you been all MY life?

[laughs]

Dennis Watson: Ah, tell me, Mr. Gardner... have you ever had sex with a man?

Chance the Gardener: No... I don't think so.

Dennis Watson: We could go upstairs right now.

Chance the Gardener: Is there a TV upstairs? I like to watch.

Dennis Watson: You like to uh, watch?

Chance the Gardener: Yes.

Dennis Watson: You wait right here. I'll go get Warren!

President "Bobby": Mr. Gardner, do you agree with Ben, or do you think that we can stimulate growth through temporary incentives?

[Long pause]

Chance the Gardener: As long as the roots are not severed, all is well. And all will be well in the garden.

President "Bobby": In the garden.

Chance the Gardener: Yes. In the garden, growth has it seasons. First comes spring and summer, but then we have fall and winter. And then we get spring and summer again.

President "Bobby": Spring and summer.

Chance the Gardener: Yes.

President "Bobby": Then fall and winter.

Chance the Gardener: Yes.

Benjamin Rand: I think what our insightful young friend is saying is that we welcome the inevitable seasons of nature, but we're upset by the seasons of our economy.

Chance the Gardener: Yes! There will be growth in the spring!

Benjamin Rand: Hmm!

Chance the Gardener: Hmm!

President "Bobby": Hm. Well, Mr. Gardner, I must admit that is one of the most refreshing and optimistic statements I've heard in a very, very long time.

[Benjamin Rand applauds]

President "Bobby": I admire your good, solid sense. That's precisely what we lack on Capitol Hill.

Chance the Gardener: All I've got left is that room upstairs.

Morton Hull: Do you realize that more people will be watching you tonight, than all those who have seen theater plays in the last forty years?

Chance the Gardener: Why?

[upon walking out of an elevator]

Chance the Gardener: That was a very small room.

Abraz: Bullshit. Who sent you here, boy? Did that chickenshit asshole Raphael send you, boy?

Chance the Gardener: No. Mr. Thomas Franklin told me I must leave the old man's house. He's dead, you know.

Abraz: Dead, my ass. You tell that asshole, if he got somethin' to tell me, to get his ass down here himself! You got that, boy?

Doctor Allenby: This won't hurt a bit.

[Sticks Chance with a needle]

Chance the Gardener: It did hurt.

[Riding in a car for the first time]

Chance the Gardener: This is just like television, only you can see much further.

Ron Steigler: Mr. Gardner, uh, my editors and I have been wondering if you would consider writing a book for us, something about your um, political philosophy, what do you say?

Chance the Gardener: I can't write.

Ron Steigler: Heh, heh, of course not, who can nowadays? Listen, I have trouble writing a postcard to my children. Look uhh, we can give you a six figure advance, I'll provide you with the very best ghost-writer, proof-readers...

Chance the Gardener: I can't read.

Ron Steigler: Of course you can't! No one has the time! We, we glance at things, we watch television...

Chance the Gardener: I like to watch TV.

Ron Steigler: Oh, oh, oh sure you do. No one reads!

[first lines]

Chance the Gardener: Good morning, Louise.

Louise: He's dead, Chance. The old man's dead.

Chance the Gardener: I see.

[Chance goes back to watching TV]