Cato Fong Quotes in Trail of the Pink Panther (1982)

Cato Fong: [answering machine message] Inspector Clouseau's residence. Cato speaking. I've gone to Miami Beach to spend Chinese New Year with my maternal grandmother. Leave a message after the bleep.

Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli: Is that why you asked me to meet you in the park, so you could attack me, like you used to attack my father?

Cato Fong: Yes. I can honestly say that your father would have been dead many times, if it weren't for my surprise attacks keeping him on his toes, alert to every danger. So I'm available, in case you are considering hiring me in the same capacity I once served your father. Ah, have a fortune cookie.

Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli: [Jacques puts the dishes down with his chopsticks and picks up the fortune cookie] Mm.

Cato Fong: What does it say?

Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli: [reads the fortune] "You will hire an Oriental family friend." Amazing.

Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli: [from another room] But what's wrong with my disguise? Dr. Balls said it was his most original creation.

Cato Fong: [the phone rings, and Cato enters the room, disguised as a rabbi; he answers the phone] Mr. Gambrelli's room. It's Commissioner Dreyfus!

Cato Fong: [Jacques enters the room, dressed in a colorful striped bath robe with a marathon label reading "Gambrelli, 2" on the back] Here you are.

Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli: Pass me the phone.

Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli: Hello? Hel- hel...

Police Commisioner Charles Dreyfus: Hello?

[Dreyfus and Jacques try to talk with each other, with some confusion on both sides]

Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli: Hello? Wait, no, wait. Hello?

Police Commisioner Charles Dreyfus: Hello? Hello, Jacques? Where are you? Hello?

[Jacques and Cato struggle as they fall on the floor]

Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli: Yes?

Police Commisioner Charles Dreyfus: Hello? Jacques, what- what's happening?

Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli: Hello?

[Jacques finally takes off his robe and talks to Dreyfus]

Police Commisioner Charles Dreyfus: Jacques?

Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli: Yes? Oh, is that you, Commissioner?

Police Commisioner Charles Dreyfus: Yes, I'm sorry to do this, but I want you to pack your bags and catch the next plane home.

Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli: What?

Police Commisioner Charles Dreyfus: You've become a political, uh, a political hot potato. The French government can't protect you.

Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli: But what about the princess?

Police Commisioner Charles Dreyfus: Officially, she is not your concern anymore.

Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli: Well, maybe not officially, but unofficially she will always be my concern! Humph!

[Jacques hangs up on Dreyfus]

Cato Fong: I think I'll come with you anyway.

Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli: No, Cato. One hot potato is too much.

Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli: [stops the car after he has just run over a sign] Get out and see what that sign says.

Cato Fong: [Cato picks up the sign] It says: "Ksar El Kebir, 175 kilometers." Is that where we're going?

Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli: No, that's where I am going! Bye, Cato!

[Jacques drives off, leaving Cato behind]

Col. Al-Durai: Remember men, it is a diplomatic imperative that Clouseau gets credit for rescuing the princess. Good luck.

Col. Al-Durai: [to Omar and Cato] Gentlemen, after you.

Omar: Me? I'm not going.

Cato Fong: Me neither.

Col. Al-Durai: In that case, Sergeant, take them out and shoot them.

Omar: I changed my mind!

[the troops start making "hup" noises and getting ready for battle as Omar and Cato head for the helicopter]

Cato Fong: Save me a seat!