Cat Quotes in Cats & Dogs (2001)


Cat Quotes:

  • Calico: [the limousine is recklessly driving to the factory gate] Brakes! gas! Break!

    [the limousine stops at the gate]

    Cat: Are we going to get away with this?

    Mr. Tinkles: [speaking like Mr Mason] Watch me.

    [the passenger window where Mr Tinkles is rolls down. The guard stands back in shock seeing Mr mason is there]

    Guard at Factory Gate: Uhh, Mr Mason. What a surprise sir.

    Mr. Tinkles: [still talking like Mr Mason] Good morning, human guard. Let us in... that is all.

    [the windows closes]

    Guard at Factory Gate: Uhh uhh... of course sir.

    Calico: Gas it up down there and step on it. Get off the breaks people!

    [the limousine speeds into the factory grounds]

  • Cat: I saw you cheating. You played your last hand, Chula.

    T.R. Chula: I don't think so. I have seven more, dog chow!

  • Cat: MOUSE... MUST... DIE.

    Napoleon: H-huh... good thing I'm not a mouse...

    Cat: Ahh, but you are a mouse. A big, yellow mouse.

  • Cat: Ahh... not a mouse... a dog. DOG MUST DIE!

  • Guillaume: You're giving these people my breakfast?

    Cat: It's just eggs and sausage, Guillaume.

    Guillaume: She already had my fucking sausage.

    Stella: Well, now she needs a bigger one.

  • Coraline Jones: How can you walk away from something and then come towards it?

    Cat: Walk around the world.

    Coraline Jones: Small world.

  • Cat: You realize you're walking right into her trap.

    Coraline Jones: I have to go back. They are my parents.

    Cat: Challenge her, then. She may not play fair, but she won't refuse. She's got a *thing* for games.

  • Coraline Jones: I can see you don't have button eyes, but... if you're the same cat, how can you talk?

    Cat: I just can.

  • Coraline Jones: [on the "Other" Mother] Why does she want me?

    Cat: She wants something to love, I think. Something that isn't her. Or, maybe she'd just love something to eat.

    Coraline Jones: Eat? That's ridiculous, mothers don't eat... daughters.

    Cat: I don't know. How do you taste?


  • Cat: You probably think this world is a dream come true. But you're wrong. The other Wybie told me so.

    Coraline Jones: That's nonsense. He can't talk.

    Cat: Perhaps not to you. We cats, however, have far superior senses than humans, and can see and smell and... Shh! I hear something. Right over...

    [meows and runs off]

  • Coraline Jones: Wybie's got a cat like you at home. Not the quiet Wybie, the one that talks too much. You must be the Other Cat.

    Cat: [speaking for the first time] No... I'm not the other anything. I'm me.

  • Cat: I don't like rats at the best of times, but this one was sounding an alarm.

  • Coraline Jones: I already know where you've hidden them.

    Other Mother: Hmm... Well, then produce them.

    Coraline Jones: They're behind that door.

    Other Mother: Oh they are, are they?

    Cat: There!

    Coraline Jones: Mom... Dad!... Go on! Open it. They'll be there alright.

    Other Mother: You're wrong, Coraline... they aren't there. Now, you're going to stay here forever.

    Coraline Jones: NO, I'M, NOT!

  • Tiger: [playing cards] I got it! I got it! I got it! Rummy!

    Cat: Tiger, for the hundredth time, we're playing poker.

  • Ronnie: [Referring to Graham Parker video they are viewing] What are you doing?

    Cat: I'm contextualizing him as one of the great figures in rock history.

    Ronnie: You can't show him in his prime in '77 and then jump straight to him as he is now. It's terrifying. You have to reverse it. You have got to show him as he is now, very briefly, and then show him in 1977. You have got to Benjamin Button it.

    Cat: I don't know what you're talking about. All rock stars are older now. Steven Tyler, David Bowie, Mick Jagger...

    Pete: Paul McCartney.

    Ronnie: Okay, stop it. Everybody that you are mentioning looks like an old woman now. You're just mentioning a bunch of Jessica Tandys. Keith Richards gets away with it, but that's because Keith Richards looked 70 when he was 40. And now that he's 70 he looks 69. He's regenerating.

  • Cat: Oh, do forgive me for scratching you, dear. I got a bit carried away. It's a cat thing.

    Babe: [laughs] Oh, well, but...

    Cat: Feeling good about tomorrow, are you?

    Babe: Mm-hmm, it should be all right, I think.

    Cat: You know, I probably shouldn't say this, but I'm not sure if you realise how much the other animals are laughing at you for this sheepdog business.

    Babe: Why would they do that?

    Cat: Well, they say that you've forgotten that you're a pig. Isn't that silly? And they even said that you don't know what pigs are for.

    Babe: What do you mean, 'what pigs are for'?

    Cat: You know, why pigs are here.

    Babe: Why are any of us here?

    Cat: Well, the cow's here to be milked, the dogs are here to help the Boss's husband with the sheep, and I'm here to be beautiful and affectionate to the Boss.

    Babe: Yes?

    Cat: [sighs softly] The fact is that pigs don't have a purpose. Just like, ducks don't have a purpose.

    Babe: [confused] Uh, I - I don't, uh...

    Cat: All right, for your own sake, I'll be blunt. Why do the Bosses keep ducks? To eat them. So why do the Bosses keep a pig? The fact is that animals that don't seem to have a purpose really do have a purpose. The Bosses have to eat. It's probably the most noble purpose of all, when you come to think about it.

    Babe: They... eat pigs?

    Cat: Pork, they call it. Or bacon. They only call them pigs when they're alive.

    Babe: But, uh, I'm a sheep pig.

    Cat: [giggles] The Boss's husband's just playing a little game with you. Believe me, sooner or later, every pig gets eaten. That's the way the world works. Oh... I haven't upset you, have I?

    [chuckles softly]

  • Cat: Some gang! An Indian ranch hand, a drunken gunfighter, a sex maniac, and an uncle!

  • Clay Boone: We can't hold up the train.

    Cat: Why not?

    Clay Boone: Lots of reasons.

    Cat: Name 'em.

    Clay Boone: We're rustlers, not train robbers.

    Cat: Well, if people didn't try something new, there wouldn't be hardly any progress at all.

  • Cat: Jackson, what's happening?

    Jackson Two-Bears: It's ghost sickness.

    Cat: What's that?

    Jackson Two-Bears: In this Indian religion, see, we believe what the gods did when they made a man crazy was they made him fall in love.

  • Cat: [Returning to the Hole in the Wall after the train robbery] We did it, Mr. Cassidy. My gang! It's just the beginning. We'll wipe out Wolf City! You help me and I'll make you rich.

    Butch Cassidy: [Reading the payroll bags] Wolf City Development. Property: H. Percival. She stole their payroll, Hedda.

    Cat: Of course.

    Butch Cassidy: You ever hear of Mr. Sir Harry Percival? He owns Wolf City Development, which owns Wolf City... which lets us alone. We don't bother them nor Sir Harry Percival, and they don't bother us.

    Cat: Sir Harry Percival. That's the man I should be after.

    Butch Cassidy: How you gonna find him?

    Cat: You won't help us?

    Butch Cassidy: Cut our own throats?

    Cat: Hole in the Wall's impregnable.

    Butch Cassidy: No such thing. It's more trouble than we're worth to dig us out. Now you made it worthwhile!

    Cat: Some gang of cutthroats and murderers. We used to whisper your names when we were kids - scared to say them out loud. How sad - you got old.

  • Cat: Mrs. Parker didn't introduce us, I'm Catherine Ballou.

    Jed: I'm drunk as a skunk.

  • Sir Harry Percival: [shows her the bedroom on the train] This is the master bedroom. Do you approve?

    Cat: Oh, it's swell. A regular Tintoretto!

  • Cat: Sir Harry Percival, I presume.

    Sir Harry Percival: Really, roughing it on the frontier - how delightful!

    Cat: Oh, you like our wide open spaces?

    [Cat remove her cape to reveal a very low cut dress]

  • Cat: I thought you were lying.

    Clay Boone: You mean I wasn't?

  • Cat: What am I gonna do?

    Jackson Two-Bears: They got a gun fighter. You get a gun fighter.

  • Cat: Oh, look at that: a painting on the ceiling!

    Sir Harry Percival: Oh, yes. That's a Tintoretto.

    Cat: I'll say it is.

  • Cat: And the first time I ask you to do something for me, like rob one little train!

  • Cat: Where are you staying?

    Jed: On the run, ma'am. Hiding out in a crowd.

  • Cat: They're trying to drive him off his ranch! They put manure in his well, they made him talk to lawyers...

  • Cat: [Looks at Frankie Ballou, lying in coffin]

    Cat: Why is he smiling like that? My father never smiled like that in his whole life?

    Cat: [looks in coffin again, apalled]

    Undertaker: Well, he's going to smile like that forever, now. Courtesy of the Wolf City Development Company.

  • Jed: Ma'am, I can understand your objection to rustlin' - a girl with your background and gentle upbringing - but it's the only way we can raise money.

    Cat: No it's not.

    Clay Boone: Well, what do you think we ought to do that's fittin' and proper?

    Cat: Rob a train.

  • Clay Boone: I think we'll go to St. Louis.

    Cat: St. Louis?

    Clay Boone: Yeah, St. Louis! City on the Missouri, railhead of the Santa Fe, jump off for the Oregon Trail - producers of beef, beer, shoes and, ah, good times.

  • Cat: What are you doing here?

    Clay Boone: Looking for you.

    Cat: But you're an outlaw.

    Clay Boone: Sure am! Got a price on my head!

    Cat: Shh...

    Clay Boone: Twenty five dollars for Jed, thirty five dollars for me. Ha ha!

    Jed: I want to thank you ma'am for all your help with my nephew and I.

  • Cat: You killed my Father!

    Sheriff Cardigan: Oh, that can't be. He's been sitting right there all morning.

    Cat: No, I saw him.

    Man #1: He hasn't been out that rocker all morning long.

    Man #2: It's a fact.

    Cat: Why do you say that?

    Sheriff Cardigan: Just telling the truth.

  • Cat: All right! You all say you love me and are beholden to me, and "take it easy Cat. We're gonna take care of you!"

  • Cat: Why do men always think marriage is the only thing on a woman's mind?

  • Cat: Jackson?

    Jackson Two-Bears: Yeah...?

    Cat: Oh, Jackson.

  • Cat: You won't make me cry. You'll never make me cry!

  • Cat: Stay here with us. There's somebody trying to kill my father.

    Jed: No.

    Clay Boone: Jed...

    Cat: Jed.

    Jed: We'll stay, ma'am, it'll be our pleasure to do what we can.

    Cat: We don't need him them.

    Clay Boone: I think you do. My Uncle here ain't never shot at a man. It's against his principles.

    Cat: Is that true?

    Jed: Oh yes, ma'am, that's true. Neither has he.

    Clay Boone: But we'll stay and do what we can. As long as there ain't no trouble.

  • Sheriff Cardigan: [the Sheriff comes to take Cat Ballou to the gallows] Well, it's time. Come on, don't just dawdle. Everybody's waiting.

    Cat: Waiting?

    Sheriff Cardigan: Looking forward to it, I might say.

    Cat: I'm sorry they don't like me.

    Sheriff Cardigan: You can't blame them, can you? Killing Sir Harry put the kibosh on the whole slaughterhouse. No jobs. No payroll. You took the bread out of half the mouths of Wolf City. You haven't got any friends.

  • Cat: Okay, he'd kill me for saying this, but my brother likes you. I'm figuring he'll never tell you. And this way it's up to you. My sisters and me, I wouldn't say we ruined him, but he's just way too considerate to make the first move.

  • Cat: Listen to me. I'm sure you can appreciate somethin'. We got a business situation here. These independents get too big, that comes out of our end.

    Charlie Smith: So, what, you just fuckin' kill 'em?

    Cat: We take care of business. That's all we do. We take care of business.

    Charlie Smith: You see this fuckin' line? This line right here I don't cross! This fuckin' line right here!

  • [Cat takes Billy to the Shells underneath the club]

    Cat: You can make some good bread doing the shows, but down here is where you get it buttered.

  • [Billy meets Cat for the first time]

    Cat: You like that stuff? Blood, guts, torture? Hmm?

  • [Billy tells Cat she doesn't have an act]

    Cat: You don't have an act? You juggle?

    Billy: No.

    Cat: Tap dance?

    Billy: No.

    Cat: Ever pull a rabbit out of your hat?

    Billy: No.

    Cat: [Cat sighs, rolling her lips] How's your scream?

    Billy: My scream?

    Cat: Yeah.

    Billy: Um...

    Cat: Like, for bloody murder. I mean, a scream, you know?

    [Cat screams her highest dramatic scream]

  • [Cat tells Billy if the doors are locked to the Shells you're fine]

    Billy: Is it dangerous?

    Cat: Mm, if the door's locked, you're fine. Yeah. Doors locked, you're good.

    Billy: How much does it pay?

    Cat: It pays the rent.

  • [Billy sees Cat watch over Franky backstage of the show, playing in the fake blood with him]

    Cat: [Cat in a British accent] 'Mama... '

    Franky: Mama.

    Cat: 'We're having a bloody good time.'

    Franky: We're having a 'bundy' good time.

    Cat: Yes, we are. Bloody good. Bloody good.

  • Cat: I mean, you are a plastic surgeon's wet dream.

  • Cat: What's going to happen?... Is there any danger?

Browse more character quotes from Cats & Dogs (2001)