Captain Oveur Quotes in Airplane! (1980)

Joey: Wait a minute. I know you. You're Kareem Abdul-Jabbar. You play basketball for the Los Angeles Lakers.

Roger Murdock: I'm sorry, son, but you must have me confused with someone else. My name is Roger Murdock. I'm the co-pilot.

Joey: You are Kareem! I've seen you play. My dad's got season tickets.

Roger Murdock: I think you should go back to your seat now, Joey. Right, Clarence?

Captain Oveur: Nahhhhhh, he's not bothering anyone. Let him stay here.

Roger Murdock: But just remember, my name is...

[showing his nametag]

Roger Murdock: ROGER MURDOCK. I'm an airline pilot.

Joey: I think you're the greatest, but my dad says you don't work hard enough on defense.

[Kareem gets angry]

Joey: And he says that lots of times, you don't even run down court. And that you don't really try... except during the playoffs.

Roger Murdock: [breaking character] The hell I don't! LISTEN, KID! I've been hearing that crap ever since I was at UCLA. I'm out there busting my buns every night! Tell your old man to drag Walton and Lanier up and down the court for 48 minutes!

Captain Oveur: Joey, have you ever been in a... in a Turkish prison?

Rumack: Captain, how soon can you land?

Captain Oveur: I can't tell.

Rumack: You can tell me. I'm a doctor.

Captain Oveur: No. I mean I'm just not sure.

Rumack: Well, can't you take a guess?

Captain Oveur: Well, not for another two hours.

Rumack: You can't take a guess for another two hours?

Operator: [Captain Oveur is on the phone with the Mayo Clinic] Excuse me, Captain Oveur, but I have an emergency call on line five from a Mr. Hamm.

Captain Oveur: Alright, give me a Hamm on five, hold the Mayo.

Roger Murdock: Flight 2-0-9'er, you are cleared for take-off.

Captain Oveur: Roger!

Roger Murdock: Huh?

Tower voice: L.A. departure frequency, 123 point 9'er.

Captain Oveur: Roger!

Roger Murdock: Huh?

Victor Basta: Request vector, over.

Captain Oveur: What?

Tower voice: Flight 2-0-9'er cleared for vector 324.

Roger Murdock: We have clearance, Clarence.

Captain Oveur: Roger, Roger. What's our vector, Victor?

Tower voice: Tower's radio clearance, over!

Captain Oveur: That's Clarence Oveur. Over.

Tower voice: Over.

Captain Oveur: Roger.

Roger Murdock: Huh?

Tower voice: Roger, over!

Roger Murdock: What?

Captain Oveur: Huh?

Victor Basta: Who?

Captain Oveur: You ever been in a cockpit before?

Joey: No sir, I've never been up in a plane before.

Captain Oveur: You ever seen a grown man naked?

[an epidemic of food poisoning is sweeping the plane]

Captain Oveur: What is it, Doctor? What's going on?

Rumack: I'm not sure. I haven't seen anything like this since the Anita Bryant concert.

Captain Oveur: Joey, do you like movies about gladiators?

Female announcer: Captain Oveur, white courtesy phone. Captain Clarence Oveur, white courtesy phone.

Female announcer: [Oveur picks up the red phone] No, the white phone.

Female announcer: Captain Oveur, white courtesy phone. Captain Clarence Oveur, white courtesy phone.

Captain Oveur: [to announcer] I GOT IT!