Bugs Quotes in Space Jam (1996)
Michael Jordan: What's going on here?
Bugs: Why Michael! l thought you'd never ask! You see These aliens from outer space want to make us slaves in their theme park. They're little. So we challenged them to a basketball game. Eh, what do we care? They're little, so we challenge them to a basketball game! But then they show up and they ain't so little,
Bugs: they're huge! We need to beat these guys, 'cause They're talking about slavery! They'll make us do stand-up, the same jokes every night every night for all eternity! We're going to be locked up like wild animals and then trotted out to perform for a bunch of lowbrow, bug-eyed, bad-headed, humor-challenged aliens! Eh, what I'm trying to say is...
Bugs: we need your help!
Michael Jordan: Yeah, but I'm a baseball player now!
[gets out rabbit skull]
Bugs: And I'm a Shakespearean actor.
Bugs: You wanna play a little one on one, doll?
Lola Bunny: [angrily, with fire in her eyes] Doll?
Bugs: [with hearts over his head] Uh huh.
Lola Bunny: On the court, *Bugs*.
Tweety Bird: Ooo, she's hot.
[Touches his rear and steam appears with a hissing sound]
Lola Bunny: [starts dribbling] Ready?
[she gets past him]
Bugs: I got it, I got it!
[she spins around him, he winds up into a knot and she makes a basket]
Michael Jordan: The girl's got skills.
Bugs: [Lola comes over to him seductively] Yes?
Lola Bunny: Don't ever call me "doll".
[blows her ears out of her face]
Lola Bunny: [as she is leaving] Nice playin' with ya.
Michael Jordan: Very smooth.
Bugs: Ahh, she's obviously nuts about me.
Michael Jordan: Obviously.
Daffy Duck: You think she's got enough toys?
Bugs: Speaking of toys, remember those mugs and t-shoits and lunchboxes with our pictures on 'em?
Daffy Duck: Yeah.
Bugs: You ever see any money from all that stuff?
Daffy Duck: Hah, not a cent!
Bugs: Hmm... me neither.
Daffy Duck: [sighs] It's a crying shame. We gotta get new agents, we're gettin' screwed!
Daffy: How's this for a new team name: The Ducks!
Bugs: Please! What kind of Mickey Mouse organization would name their team The Ducks?
Bugs: Look at our facilities.
Daffy: We've got hoops!
Elmer Fudd: We've got weights!
Sylvester: We've got balls!
Michael Jordan: You sure do. This place is a mess.
Monstar Bupkus: That's mine!
Bugs: [stealing the ball] Not today.
Announcer: Ladies and gentlemen, the starting lineup for the Toon Squad: Standing two foot four, The Wonder from Down Under: The Tasmanian Devil!
[Taz squeezes two balls in his mouth, pops them, and spins around]
Announcer: At small forward: standing a scintillating three foot two, The Heartthrob of the Hoops: Lola Bunny!
[Lola dribbles and spins the ball on her finger]
Announcer: At power forward, The Quackster of the Court: Daffy Duck!
Daffy Duck: Thank you! Thank you!
[Silence from the audience, crickets chirping]
Daffy Duck: [disappointed, but sarcastically] Very funny. Leth's all laugh at the duck!
Announcer: And the point guard, standing three foot three, four feet if you include the ears, Co-captain of the toon squad, the Doctor of Delight: Bugs Bunny!
Bugs: Thank you! Thank you!
Announcer: And now, the player coach of the Toon Squad, at six foot six from North Carolina, his Royal Airness: Michael Jordan!
Sylvester: [after a few suggestions of what to challenge the Nerdlucks to] Suffering succotash! What's wrong with all of ya? I say... we get a ladder
[as you see a mental image of him on a ladder outside of a window where Tweety Bird is sitting in his cage]
Sylvester: ... wait till the old lady gets out of the room... then grab that little bird!
[grabs Tweety Bird, then the scene transitions back to Sylvester holding on to one of his thumbs, hyperventilating]
Bugs: Whoa, whoa! Take a deep breath, Sly!
Lola Bunny: [Bugs has just been squashed after pushing Lola out of the way] Are you okay?
Bugs: Me? Oh yeah, I'm fine. Are you okay?
Lola Bunny: Oh Bugs, thank you.
Bugs: Aww, it was nothin'.
Lola Bunny: That was the nicest thing anyone's ever done for me.
[she gives him a long kiss, then leaves]
Michael Jordan: Bugs?
Bugs: Yeah, Mike?
Michael Jordan: Stay out of trouble.
Bugs: [to Lola] You know I will.
Bugs: [grabbing her arms] Come here!
[he gives her a long kiss, she howls and then quickly changes to the next scene by pulling it down over them like a window shade]
Nerdluck Bang: We seek the one they call Bugs Bunny.
Nerdluck Nawt: Yeah, Bugs Bunny.
Nerdluck Bupkus: Have you seen him?
Nerdluck Blanko: Is he around?
Bugs: Hmmm... Bugs Bunny... Bugs Bunny... Say, don't he have, uh, great big long ears...
[pulls his ears]
Bugs: like this?
Bugs: And does he hop around like this?
[hops around the forrest]
Bugs: And does he say, "What's up, doc?" like this?
Bugs: Eh, what's up, doc?
Nerdlucks: [excited] YEAH!
Bugs: [leaves] Nope, never heard of him.
Bugs: [to the audience] Y'know, maybe there *is* no intelligent life out there in the univoise after all.
Bugs: Okay, okay, which one of you maroons has ever played basketball?
Bugs: Yeah, Sure, let the little pipsqueaks knock themselves out,
Bugs: These little pipsqueaks just turned into superstars!
Bugs: You expected the Easter Bunny?
Bugs: Look out for that first step, doc, it's a real lulu.
Bugs: Not real? lf l weren't real, could l do this?
Bugs: Let the doctor take a look. A little high. Going down!
Bugs: You know, maybe there is no intelligent life out in the universe after all.
Nick Adams: [After the roadwork is stopped] That a mile?
Bugs: Sure. We do a 100 yards to a mile.
Bugs: [to Nick as he is leaving] You, uh, find yourself a buddy - your own kind of buddy. A man alone has no damn chance, you hear?
Bugs: [seeing Goofy in an ill-fitting suit] What are you all dressed up for?
Goofy: Me and Pops was over to see Mom. She's in the county jail.
Fats: Yeah? What for?
Goofy: Thirty days. Pop's goin' next 'cause he's gonna beat up Mama when she gts out.
Browse more character quotes from Space Jam (1996)
Characters on Space Jam (1996)
- Michael Jordan
- Stan Podalak
- Looney Tunes
- Charles Barkley
- Lola Bunny
- Shawn Bradley
- Monstar Bupkus
- Monstar Blanko
- Mr. Swackhammer
- Larry Bird
- James Jordan
- Michael Jordan at 10
- Female Seer
- Male Fan
- Nerdluck Bang
- Nerdluck Blanko
- Nerdluck Pound
- Nerdluck Bupkus
- Nerdluck Nawt
- Muggsy Bogues
- Larry Johnson
- Jeffrey Jordan
- Woman Fan
- Monstar Pound
- Monstar Bang
- Patrick Ewing