Brother Constance Quotes in Heaven Help Us (1985)

[Caesar's desk falls apart when Brother sits on it]

Brother Constance: Oh, you'll pay for that Caesar!

Caesar: [indignantly] But, Brother my screws are gone!

Brother Thadeus: [Dunn, Rooney, Caesar, Williams and Corbet are in Brother Thadeus' office after the melee in the auditorium] Can you gentlemen give me one good reason why you shouldn't be expelled?

Michael Dunn: It's my fault, brother. I'm the one who should be expelled.

Brother Thadeus: You all acted as one, Mr. Dunn. And as one, you shall bear the consequences.

Michael Dunn: Yes, brother, but I started it.

Brother Thadeus: Did you? As I understand it, Brother Constance started it.

Brother Constance: [in disbelief] What?

Brother Thadeus: I'm suspending you for two weeks. Good day, gentlemen.

Brother Constance: [boys leave... Brother Dominic comes in and hands Thadeus a sheet of paper, which he signs... Constance is angry] What do you mean I started it? They've assaulted the faculty, the've disgraced this institution, and they destroyed a statue of St. Basil.

Brother Thadeus: I always hated that statue.

[signs paper and hands it to Constance]

Brother Constance: What's this?

Brother Thadeus: Well, you're transferred out of this institution. I don't want you working with children anymore.

Brother Constance: [angry] You can't do this! I will demand an investigation. I will take this all the way to the bishop if I have to.

Brother Thadeus: Take it whereever you want, brother...

[opens door]

Brother Thadeus: just take it out of my office!

[Constance glares at Timothy and then storms out the door]

Brother Thadeus: It appears we have a vacancy, brother. Think you can fit in?

Brother Timothy: [smiles] I think so, brother.

Brother Constance: [in Thadeus' closed-door office after melee in auditorium] They should be expelled. In the real world, they'd be charged with assault.

Brother Timothy: In the 'real world', they'd have a case of self-defense!

Brother Constance: I think expulsion is justified here.

Brother Timothy: I don't think so.

Brother Constance: Well, no one cares what you think!

Brother Thadeus: [to Brother Dominic, also in his office] Let the boys in here.

Brother Constance: Are you familiar with the term "miserable"? Because miserable is what I'm going to make your miserable lives, every miserable minute of every miserable day!

Rooney, Caesar, Michael Dunn, Corbet, Williams: Yes, Brother.

Brother Constance: Yes Brother what?

Rooney, Caesar, Michael Dunn, Corbet, Williams: Yes Brother, miserable, Brother.

[Brother William brings the five into the gymnasium, where Brother Constance is standing in front of the exercise horse]

Brother Constance: That's far enough. Thank you, brother.

[Brother William leaves]

Brother Constance: Gentlemen, we will dispense with the traditional accusation denial ritual. It is such a bore, and not likely to convince me that I don't have before me right now at least one, if not all of the vandals. But since I'm a just man with no taste for punishing the innocent, I will afford the guilty the opportunity to speak now and to save the innocent from an impending state of wretchedness. Well?

Rooney: Could you repeat that, brother?

Brother Constance: [walks toward Rooney] Shut up. All right, who did it? Speak now or you will all suffer for it.

Michael Dunn: I did.

Brother Constance: [walks to Michael] Mr. Dunn.

Rooney: He didn't do it. Uh, Williams did it.

Williams: What do you mean "I did it"? Corbet did it.

Corbet: No, it was Caesar's idea to take the head off.

[the five protests and argue about the incident]

Brother Constance: [impatient and angry] All right. All right! That's enough!

[the boys fall silent]

Brother Constance: Have it your own way, gentlemen.