Brian Kelly Quotes in Gleaming the Cube (1989)

Brian Kelly: I don't know what's worse: getting blown up in nuclear war or having a 7-11 on every corner.

Brian Kelly: If my dog had a face like yours I'd shave his ass and teach him to walk backwards.

Tina Trac: How did you get to be so cynical?

Brian Kelly: Practice.

[Brian comes to school with a new, clean-cut look]

Yabbo: Brian, Halloween's not 'til October.

Brian Kelly: So?

Yabbo: So? Where's your board?

Brian Kelly: I felt like walking today!

Yabbo: Why are you wearing those clothes?

Gremic: Oh, I know, his clothes are in the cleaners.

Buddy: I bet his mom put him up to it.

Brian Kelly: I guess we all do unexpected things sometimes, don't we?

Brian Kelly: Can I ask you something personal?

Tina Trac: Sure...

Brian Kelly: Where's the bathroom?

Brian Kelly: Do you know what a farm vet does? He helps cows get well so they can live long enough to be turned into Quarter Pounders. It's ridiculous!

Mr. Kelly: [after picking up Brian at the police station] Brian, the skateboard stays in the garage.

Brian Kelly: Heh! What you worried about? It's not gonna shit on the rug!

Harvey McGill: Why was he following you?

Brian Kelly: I dunno. He was just following me. Maybe he was a pervert.

Al Lucero: Oh right, you jumped into the back of a pervert's car? What are you? Playing hard to get?

Brian Kelly: You know, if my dog had a face like yours, I'd shave his ass and teach him to walk backwards!

Brian Kelly: Longdale's gonna be pissed!

Brian Kelly: I take it you don't do white guys.

Kenya Denise McQueen: I just happen to prefer black men. It's not a prejudice, it's a preference.

Brian Kelly: Sure, it's your preference to be prejudice.

Brian Kelly: Can I ask you one more question?

Kenya Denise McQueen: Hmm?

Brian Kelly: [grabs a piece of her hair] Can you take this off?

Kenya Denise McQueen: [opens eyes] What do you mean?

Brian Kelly: I mean, it's not a wig, right? But it's not your real hair either, is it?

Kenya Denise McQueen: [stares at him for a moment, then sits up] I can't believe you just asked me that.

Brian Kelly: I'm sorry, I'm just curious.

Kenya Denise McQueen: It's a weave, if you must know. I thought you dated black girls.

Brian Kelly: They had real hair.

Kenya Denise McQueen: I have real hair too.

Brian Kelly: Underneath?

Kenya Denise McQueen: Yes, underneath!

Brian Kelly: So what, they just... they sew it in?

Kenya Denise McQueen: Something like that.

Brian Kelly: I take hard earth and make things bloom.

Brian Kelly: Kenya, I love you.

Kenya Denise McQueen: [turns away] I don't know what to say.

Brian Kelly: Uh... should I give you a hint?

Kenya Denise McQueen: I don't do dogs.

Brian Kelly: Neither do I. We're just good friends.

Kenya Denise McQueen: I know you must think I'm combative, neurotic, picky... And maybe I am. But the weird thing is, I've never had to be anything but myself with you right from the beginning. And with you I feel like I can do anything, say anything, try anything. And that's the life I want. I want an adventure with you. You don't understand, we're suppose to be together.

Brian Kelly: I'm never going to be your dream man Kenya. I just... I won't be the fall-back guy.

Kenya Denise McQueen: No, see that's the thing. I don't have to wonder about that anymore. I know this is right. Hey, when I was younger, my dream was to marry Rick James. You're the one I want Brian. I love you.

Brian Kelly: I love you Kenya. I've never stopped loving you.

Brian Kelly: You know what, I'm never gonna be on the right side of the war going on inside your head, because I'm not black. Alright, I'm never gonna be black. So maybe this isn't what you want.

Brian Kelly: I swear I didn't see it coming.

Kenya Denise McQueen: I promised my girlfriends that I'd be more open.

Brian Kelly: But not this open.