Brett Quotes in Maximum Overdrive (1986)

Brett: I ain't never seen a hero with his ass in the air like that.

Brett: If you don't get your hand off my leg, you're going to be wiping your ass with a hook next time you take a dump!

Camp Loman: I never heard no talk like that when I was a boy.

[seeing Hendershot's weapons stash]

Brett: Holy shit! You think he stole all this?

Bill Robinson: No, I think he bought it. That's what a guy like him does.

Brett: Buys things...?

Bill Robinson: Buy cheap and sell dear. It's the American way.

Brett: Maybe tomorrow it will be our world again.

Bill Robinson: I don't know. Was it ever?

Brett: I'm scared.

Brett: Eat my shorts!

Bill Robinson: What the hell are you doing in there?

Brett: Changing. That salesman had his hands all over me, and he's dead now and I don't like the smell of him on me. I don't like it.

Bill Robinson: Jesus!

Deke: Bill, where's my dad?

Hendershot: [casual tone] Oh, your dad got scrubbed by one of 'em big boys out there earlier today. Tough break, kid.

Brett: You unbelievable shithead!

Hendershot: [oblivious] What? What'd I do?

Brett: [radio goes static] Shit!

Camp Loman: Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! What's wrong there, sweet thing?

Brett: Pull in there! And if you don't get your hand off my leg you're gonna be wiping your ass with a hook the next time you take a dump.

Camp Loman: I swear, I never heard no talk like that when I was a boy.

Bill Robinson: Mother's helper?

Brett: A girl hitching her way down to Florida needs some protection.

Bill Robinson: Yeah? That's what you're doing?

Brett: Yeah. That I was doing before every machine went into maximum overdrive.

Grandma Pearl: Who's there? I got a gun!

Brett: [attempting to be Kaylee, but fails] It's just Kaylee, Grandma.

Grandma Pearl: Kaylee? You can't be Kaylee. My, you've gotten so tall, and muscular.

Brett: [to Jake] Hey, ass wipe. Cool shirt.

[splashes Jake with his slurpee]

David: Congratulations, "darling".

Brett: I had it. I had pitched the perfect game, and I had to screw the whole thing up. My mother saw the whole thing on TV.

David: She must have been surprised to find out that you had a male lover.

Brett: No. She said she always suspected it. She told me we would make a lovely couple.

David: And your kids?

Brett: They think it's cool.

Brett: My children know that they are too old to be aborted.

Brett: Stop everything for the rest of your life. Every time you have an idea, I want you to come to me and as your friend, I will shoot your idea down.

David: Do your kids play professional basketball?

Brett: No, not to my knowledge but I will enquire. They don't tell me everything.

Vlad: Wanna play a game?

Brett: Spin the bottle? Oh babe... I thought we only played that when we were alone together at home!

Vlad: Maybe later. Now screw off!

Jules: You, flock of seagulls, you know why we're here? Why don't you tell my man Vincent where you got the shit hid at?

Marvin: It's over th...

Jules: I don't remember askin' you a Goddamn thing! You were saying?

Roger: It's in the cupboard.

[Vincent starts looking in the upper cupboard]

Roger: No, no, the one by your kn-knees.

Jules: We happy?

[Vincent continues staring at the briefcase's contents]

Jules: Vincent! We happy?

Vincent: Yeah, we happy.

Brett: I'm sorry, I didn't get your name. I got yours, Vincent, right? But I didn't get yours...

Jules: My name's Pitt. And your ass ain't talkin' your way out of this shit.

Brett: No, no, I just want you to know... I just want you to know how sorry we are that things got so fucked up with us and Mr. Wallace. We got into this thing with the best intentions and I never...

Jules: [Jules shoots the man on the couch] I'm sorry, did I break your concentration? I didn't mean to do that. Please, continue, you were saying something about best intentions. What's the matter? Oh, you were finished! Well, allow me to retort. What does Marsellus Wallace look like?

Brett: What?

Jules: What country are you from?

Brett: What? What? Wh - ?

Jules: "What" ain't no country I've ever heard of. They speak English in What?

Brett: What?

Jules: English, motherfucker, do you speak it?

Brett: Yes! Yes!

Jules: Then you know what I'm sayin'!

Brett: Yes!

Jules: Describe what Marsellus Wallace looks like!

Brett: What?

Jules: Say 'what' again. Say 'what' again, I dare you, I double dare you motherfucker, say what one more Goddamn time!

Brett: H-H-He's black...

Jules: Go on!

Brett: He's bald...!

Jules: Does he look like a bitch?

Brett: What?

Jules: [shoots Brett in the shoulder] DOES HE... LOOK... LIKE A BITCH?

Brett: No!

Jules: Then why you tryin' to fuck him like a bitch, Brett?

Brett: I didn't...!

Jules: Yes, you did. Yes, you did, Brett! You tried to fuck him.

Brett: [gasping] No, no...

Jules: But Marcellus Wallace don't like to be fucked by anybody except Mrs. Wallace.

Jules: Hey kids! How you boys doin'?

[to man laying on the couch]

Jules: Hey, keep chillin'. You know who we are? We're associates of your business partner Marsellus Wallace. You do remember your business partner don't you? Let me take a wild guess here. You're Brett, right?

Brett: Yeah.

Jules: I thought so. You remember your business partner Marsellus Wallace, don't you, Brett?

Brett: Yeah, yeah, I remember him.

Jules: Good. Looks like me an Vincent caught you boys at breakfast. Sorry about that. Whatcha havin'?

Brett: Hamburgers.

Jules: Hamburgers! The cornerstone of any nutritious breakfast. What kind of hamburgers?

Brett: Ch-cheeseburgers.

Jules: No, no no, where'd you get 'em? McDonalds? Wendy's? Jack in the Box? Where?

Brett: Big Kahuna Burger.

Jules: Big Kahuna Burger. That's that Hawaiian burger joint. I hear they got some tasty burgers. I ain't never had one myself. How are they?

Brett: They're good.

Jules: Mind if I try one of yours? This is yours here, right?

[Picks up burger and takes a bite]

Jules: Mmm-mmmm. That is a tasty burger. Vincent, ever have a Big Kahuna Burger?

[Vincent shakes his head]

Jules: Wanna bite? They're real tasty.

Vincent: Ain't hungry.

Jules: Well, if you like burgers give 'em a try sometime. I can't usually get 'em myself because my girlfriend's a vegitarian which pretty much makes me a vegitarian. But I do love the taste of a good burger. Mm-mm-mm. You know what they call a Quarter Pounder with cheese in France?

Brett: No.

Jules: Tell 'em, Vincent.

Vincent: A Royale with cheese.

Jules: A Royale with cheese! You know why they call it that?

Brett: Because of the metric system?

Jules: Check out the big brain on Brett! You're a smart motherfucker. That's right. The metric system. What's in this?

Brett: Sprite.

Jules: Sprite, good. You mind if I have some of your tasty beverage to wash this down?

Brett: Go right ahead.

Jules: Ah, hit the spot.

Jules: Do you know what they call a Quarter Pounder with cheese in France?

Brett: No.

Jules: Tell him, Vincent.

Vincent: Royale with cheese.

Jules: Royale with cheese. Do you know why they call it a Royale with cheese?

Brett: Because of the metric system?

Jules: Check out the big brain on Brett. You one smart motherfucker.

Jules: You read the Bible, Brett?

Brett: Yes.

Jules: Well, there's this passage I got memorized, sorta fits the occasion. "Ezekiel 25:17". "The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the iniquities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he who in the name of cherish and good will shepherds the weak through the valley of darkness for he is truly his keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know my name is the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon thee."

[Jules and Vincent shoot and kill Brett]

Champ: [to Harold the bar owner] Hey, Roland says you had some gooks in here last week.

Harold: So? What's it to you?

Luke: Well, what were they doing here?

Brett: Yeah, this is our place, mate.

Harold: No, this is my fuckin' place, mate.

Cackles: Oh, yeah, but you had gooks here, eh?

Harold: Doesn't bother me. You got a problem with that, that's your fuckin' problem.

Brett: That man there isn't just mowin' lawns. He's got a plan.

Sean Torrance: First out lawns, then our women.

Ripley: Whenever he says *anything* you say "right", Brett. You know that?

Brett: Right.

Ripley: Parker, what do you think? Your staff just follows you around and says "right". Just like a regular parrot.

Parker: [laughs] Yeah, shape up. What are you, some kind of parrot?

Brett: Right.

[first lines]

Brett: This is the worst shit I've ever seen, man.

Parker: What you say? You got any biscuits over there?

Ripley: Here's some cornbread.

Parker: Cornbread. Yeah.

Lambert: I am cold.

Parker: Still with us, Brett?

Brett: Right.

Kane: Oh, I feel dead.

Parker: Anybody ever tell you you look dead, man?

[Kane wakes up from his comatose state]

Parker: How ya doin'?

Kane: Terrific. Next silly question?

[they laugh, Ash hands him a cup of water]

Kane: Oh, thank you.

Dallas: You remember anything about the planet?

[Kane shakes his head]

Ripley: What's the last thing you do remember? Huh?

Kane: I remember some... horrible dream about... smothering? I don't know... Anyway, where are we?

Dallas: We're right here.

Ripley: We're on our way home!

Brett: Yeah, back to the ole freezerinos. Ahaha.

Dallas: [looks at a pen being dissolved by alien's body fluid] I haven't seen anything like that except, uh, molecular acid.

Brett: It must be using it for blood.

Parker: It's got a wonderful defense mechanism. You don't dare kill it.

[Director's Cut only]

Lambert: [slapping Ripley] You bitch!

Brett: Easy!

Parker: Hey! Hey!

Lambert: You were gonna leave us out there!

Dallas: Alright. Ripley, when I give an order I expect to be obeyed.

Ripley: Even if it's against the law?

Dallas: You're goddamn right!

Parker: If they find what they're lookin' for out there, that mean we get full shares?

Ripley: Don't worry, Parker, yeah. You'll get whatever's coming to you.

Brett: Look, I'm not gonna do any more work until we get this straightened out.

Ripley: Brett, you're guaranteed by law to get a share.

Parker: What?

Ripley: Why don't you just fuck off?

Parker: What?

Brett: Uh, what'd you say, Rip?

Ripley: If you have any trouble, I'll be on the bridge.

Brett: [realizing Nostromo has changed its course and they have to investigate] Well, so what?

Kane: Well, we are obligated under section eight...

Parker: I hate to bring this up but, uh, this a commercial ship, not a rescue ship...

Brett: Right.

Parker: ...and it's not in my contract to do this kind of duty. Now what about the money? If you wanna give me some money to do it, I'll be happy to, uh, t-to, you know, oblige.

Brett: The man's right.

Dallas: Parker...

Parker: Let's go over the bonus situation. We haven't... Can we just talk about the bonus situation?

Ash: I'm sorry, can I say something?

Parker: Let's talk about the bonus more.

Ash: There is a clause in the contract which specifically states any systematized transmission indicating a possible intelligent origin must be investigated.

Parker: I don't wanna hear it...

Brett: We don't know if it's intelligent.

Parker: I wanna go home and party.

Dallas: Parker, will you just listen to the man?

Ash: On penalty of total forfeiture of shares. No money.

Dallas: You got that?

Parker: [chuckling] Well, yeah.

Dallas: All right, we're going in.

Parker: [to Brett] Yeah, we're going in, aren't we?

[repeated line]

Brett: Right.

Brett: Here kitty, kitty, kitty. Meow. Here, Jonesy.

Parker: Uh, before we dock, I think we oughta discuss the bonus situation.

Brett: Right.

Parker: Brett and I, we think we oughta... we deserve full shares, right baby?

Brett: Right. You see, Mr. Parker and I feel that the bonus situation has never been on a-an equitable level.

Dallas: Well, you get what you're contracted for like everybody else.

Brett: Yes, but everybody else, uh, gets more than us.

Brett: Enough of this "kitty" shit.

Brett: Follow the blood!

Peter: [Laurel is seen kissing Dominic when a light, operated by Brett, is shined on them] Is our, uh, Cinderella ready to her scene, or does she still need time to warm up?

Laurel: Brett, you're a fucking bastard!

Brett: Arose by any other name.

Brett: [grabs Corrine jokingly by the throat] Don't worry, dear, it's only Mother. What's our bright-eyed ingénue reading now?

Corinne: Stanislavski.

Brett: Oh, saints preserve us.

Corinne: It's what an actor prepares, it's fantastic.

Brett: Hmm, let me know when you get up to the part about making enough money to keep body and soul together. That's the information I can use.

[Laurel screams in background]

Brett: Oh, look at Laurel. She's a perfect example of the method; she really feels her part. Keep it up, sweetie!

[Laurel flicks him off]

Philip Truscott: Keep an eye on your roping, won't you.

Brett: Why roping, particularly?

Philip Truscott: Uh, student business last week.

Dewhurst: That's right. Nasty business. Very nasty.

Edmund Delhurst: It's not working. Months of experiments, eleven different formulas, now a scalp transplant and it's still not working.

Brett: We're wasting our time with animals, Professor Delhurst. We give them massive doses of radiation so they'll lose their hair, then we try to make it grow back again, but it won't. Just end up dying from cancer.

Edmund Delhurst: Don't be an idiot all your life, Brett. They pay me to study cancer. The Institute expects animal research. They expect radiation treatments. If it happens that I stumble on a cure for baldness, lucky me. And lucky you, too, baldy.