Beany Quotes in The Pebble and the Penguin (1995)

[after Hubie's failure to beat Drake]

Beany: [to Hubie] Go knock his block off!

Beany: What's a helot?

The Colonel: You've ever been broke, sonny?

Beany: Sure, mostly often.

The Colonel: All right. You're walking along, not a nickel in your jeans, your free as the wind, nobody bothers ya. Hundreds of people pass you by in every line of business: shoes, hats, automobiles, radios, everything, and there all nice lovable people and they lets you alone, is that right? Then you get a hold of some dough and what happens, all those nice sweet lovable people become helots, a lotta heels. They begin to creep up on ya, trying to sell ya something: they get long claws and they get a stranglehold on ya, and you squirm and you duck and you holler and you try to push them away but you haven't got the chance. They gots ya. First thing ya know you own things, a car for instance, now your whole life is messed up with alot more stuff: you get license fees and number plates and gas and oil and taxes and insurance and identification cards and letters and bills and flat tires and dents and traffic tickets and motorcycle cops and tickets and courtrooms and lawers and fines and... a million and one other things. What happens? You're not the free and happy guy you used to be. You need to have money to pay for all those things, so you go after what the other fellas got. There you are, you're a helot yourself.

Long John Willoughby: Hey, stop worryin', Colonel, fifty bucks ain't gonna ruin me.

The Colonel: I've seen plenty of fellas start out with fifty bucks and wind up with a *bank* account!

Beany: Hey, what's wrong with a bank account, anyway?

The Colonel: And let me tell you, Long John, when you become a guy with a bank account, they gotcha! Yes sir, they gotcha!

Beany: Who's got him?

The Colonel: The helots!

Angelface: [after Willoughby gives the Colonel the $50 to give away] Say, he's giving it away. I better get me some of that

Beany: Hey, come back here you helot.

Long John Willoughby: [gets carried away spanking his own knees as he describes his dream to Ann]

Long John Willoughby: So I came down and I whacked you a good one, see? Then he whacked you, and I whacked you another one, and we both started whackin' you like...

Long John Willoughby: [stops abruptly when he realizes Beany is standing right behind him]

Beany: Well if you're through whackin' her, c'mon let's get goin'.