Baloo Quotes in The Jungle Book (2016)

[from trailer]

Baloo: [singing] Forget about your worries and your strife...

Mowgli: What's that?

Baloo: That's a song about the good life.

Mowgli, Bagheera, Baloo, Raksha: This is the law of the jungle, it's old and it's true as the sky / And the wolf that should keep it may prosper, but the wolf who will break it must die / For the strength of the pack is the wolf and the strength of the wolf is the pack.

Baloo: They want to send you to the man-village? I say, you can be a man right here!

[from trailer]

Baloo: If anything happens to that kid, I'll never forgive myself!

Baloo: What did I tell you? He's special.

Bagheera: I know he's special. I raised him.

Baloo: Then don't make him leave, Bagheera. You gotta let him be what he is.

Bagheera: You don't understand. The boy's in danger.

Baloo: I know, he told me. He's being hunted by a tiger.

Bagheera: Not any tiger, Shere Khan.

Baloo: Shere Khan's hunting him? Oh. But if you send him back to the man village they'll ruin him. They'll make a man out of him. We should send him back to the wolf pack. Who's their alpha? Akela. He can protect him.

Bagheera: Akela is dead.

Baloo: What?

Bagheera: Shere Khan killed him. He will stop at nothing until he has this boy. Nothing. The only way we can save him is if he goes to that man village. Please, Baloo. You're the only one he'll listen to.

Baloo: [Mowgli wakes up to find Baloo's nose in his face sniffing him. He screams in terror. Baloo sharply draws his head back] Relax, kid. There's no need to get worked up. Okay?

Baloo: [sitting in a tree with Mowgli and Bagheera] I could get used to this.

Baloo: [having sent Mowgli away] Well, I did it. And that's about the hardest thing I've ever done.

Bagheera: I know.

Bagheera: Mowgli.

Baloo: Where is he?

Bagheera: In the pit.

Baloo: In the what?

Bagheera: Is this your teaching?

Baloo: Oh, come on! You know I'd never teach him to mess around with elephants.

Mowgli: It's honey stacks for winter.

Bagheera: Have you lost your mind?

Mowgli: You said you wouldn't get mad.

Bagheera: Did you listen to anything Akela taught you? There's no place in the jungle for these tricks. You want to do this you do it in the man village.

Mowgli: But I'm helping Baloo get ready for hibernation.

Bagheera: Bears don't hibernate in a jungle. What are you teaching him?

Baloo: Not full hibernation but I nap a lot.

Bagheera: Listen to me, you con artist! He may not know your game, but I do. He's leaving now.

Mowgli: But I don't want to leave!

Bagheera: You don't have a choice!

Baloo: Why don't we just settle down for a minute, it's gotten late. Too late to travel. So why don't we just have a little honey?

Bagheera: I don't eat honey.

Baloo: No problem, I'll eat the honey. Let's all get a good night's sleep and we can talk about this in the morning.

Bagheera: Fine, but we're leaving first thing.

Baloo: You have never been a more endangered species than you are at this moment.

Baloo: Didn't the wolves ever sing?

Mowgli: We recited the law of the jungle: "This is the law of the jungle as old and as true as the sky. The wolf that keeps it may prosper, but the wolf that breaks it will die."

Baloo: Kid, that's not a song. That's propaganda.

Mowgli: What's propaganda?

[from trailer; singing]

Baloo: Forget about your worries and your strife.

Mowgli: What's that?

Baloo: That's a song about the good life.

Baloo: I can show myself out, thanks. Bye bye.

Mowgli: Bagheera!

Bagheera: Mowgli. Stay right there we'll come around to you.

Mowgli: Is it true?

Bagheera: What?

Mowgli: Is Akela dead?

Bagheera: We were going to tell you.

Mowgli: You knew! You both knew! And nobody ever heard anything about it!

Baloo: Kid just hold on.

Mowgli: Someone's gotta do something!

Baloo: [after seeing Louie for the first time] Oh my gosh is that King Louie?

[Louie looks annoyed]

Baloo: This is so exciting. The legend do you know justice sir? You are truly enormous!

[Chuckles nervously]

Baloo: Look at all that flesh just squatting there on that ancient throne. How majestic!

King Louie: [to his monkeys] Seize him!

Baloo: Excuse me anybody? Excuse me, am I in the right monkey temple? Oh my gosh, is that King Louie? This is so exiting. The Legends you know justice sir. You are truly enormous. In the best way. Look at all that flesh just squatting on ancient throne. How majestic.

Baloo: I did it.

Bagheera: Well done, old chap. He must be in there. Follow me.

Baloo: No no. We're on level ground here. I'm in charge, and I've got a plan.

Baloo: Hey! Hang on! Can you just hang on! I climbed up a mountain to see you just to be in your presence. For me this is a dream come true.

King Louie: Throw him off the cliff!

Baloo: Uh.

Bagheera: I'll take it from here.

Baloo: No, no. I'm coming. It's doable if I don't have to go to high.

Bagheera: Good. Let's get going.

Baloo: All right.

Baloo: [climbing a cliff, frightened] A bird! That can't be a good sign!

Bagheera: [alongside him] Baloo, look at me. Look at nothing but me. You're doing fine.

Baloo: I'm afraid of heights.

Baloo: Can you keep your voice down? I'm trying to concentrate.

Mowgli: Where am i?

Baloo: Uh this is a cave. It's my cave. You don't remember what happened didn't you?

Mowgli: No.

Baloo: I saved your life. I saved you from the jaws of death the coils of death if you will. And lucky for you your new favorite hero old Baloo here just happened to be passing by.

Baloo: Hey! Hey Mowgli my friend my buddy my pal. Slow down a second there handsome!

Mowgli: Bagheera said i have to go to the man village.

Baloo: Bagheera? I know him! You know what his problem is? He always plays by the rules.

Baloo: Why do you want to go there?

Mowgli: Bagheera said so.

Baloo: Again with the listening to Bagheera.

Mowgli: Hey he's my friend all right? Now i don't know where he is,

Baloo: I was hoping and you may not be open to this at all but I was hoping and once again this is a dream but I was hoping that I might become a bander log myself. Gosh I wanna be like you. I'm hitching a wagon to your star!

Baloo: [Looking at the pangolin] You have never been a more endangered species than you are at this moment...

Mowgli: Oh, Baloo, I wanna stay with you.

Baloo: Certainly, you do.

Bagheera: Oh? And just how do you think he will survive?

Baloo: "How do you think he will... " What do you mean how do you think he... He's with me, ain't he? And I'll learn him all I know.

Bagheera: Oh? That shouldn't take too long.

Mowgli: [to the unconscious Baloo] Baloo, get up. Oh, please get up.

Bagheera: Mowgli, try to understand.

Mowgli: Bagheera, what's the matter with him?

Bagheera: You've got to be brave, like Baloo was.

Mowgli: You... you don't mean... Oh, no. Baloo.

Bagheera: Now, now. I know how you feel. But you must remember, Mowgli. Greater love hath no one than he who lays down his life for his friend.

[At this point, Baloo starts waking up, unbeknownst to Bagheera and Mowgli]

Bagheera: Whenever great deeds are remembered in this jungle, one name will stand above all others: our friend, Baloo the bear.

Baloo: [sniffing; softly] He's cracking me up.

Bagheera: The memory of Baloo's sacrifice and bravery will forever be engraved on our saddened hearts.

Baloo: Beautiful.

Bagheera: This spot where Baloo fell will always be a hallowed place in the jungle, for there lies one of nature's noblest creatures.

Baloo: I wish my mother could have heard this.

Bagheera: It's best we leave now. Come along, man-cub.

Baloo: [suddenly wide awake] Hey, don't stop now, Baggy, you're doing great! There's more, lots more!

Bagheera: [shocked and angry] Why, you big fraud! You-you-you four-flusher! I-I'm fed up!...

Mowgli: [ecstatic] Baloo! You're all right!

Baloo: Who, me? Sure I am. Never felt better.

Baloo: [singing] Now when you pick a pawpaw / Or a prickly pear/ And you prick a raw paw / Well, next time beware / Don't pick the prickly pear by the paw / When you pick a pear try to use the claw / But you don't need to use the claw / When you pick a pear of the big pawpaw / Have I given you a clue?

Mowgli: Golly, thanks, Baloo.

Bagheera: Pawpaw, ha! Of all the silly gibberish.

Baloo: [tugging on Bagheera's tail] C'mon, Baggy, get with the beat.

Bagheera: This will take brains, not brawn.

Baloo: You better believe it, and I'm loaded with both.

Baloo: So just try and... relax. Yeah. Cool it. Fall apart in my backyard. 'Cause let me tell you something, little britches: if you act like that bee at... Uh-uh. You're working too hard. And don't spend your time lookin' around for something you want that can't be found...

Baloo: [singing] When you find out you can live without it / And go along not thinking about it / I'll tell you something true / The bare necessities of life will come to you.

Mowgli: Where we goin', Baloo?

Baloo: Well, uh, it's uh... um... well, it's sorta new and, uh...

Mowgli: Oh, I don't care, as long as I'm with you.

Baloo: Mowgli, look, buddy, uh, there's somethin' I gotta tell ya.

Mowgli: Tell me what, Baloo?

Baloo: Oh, gee whiz. Now, how did ol' Baggy put it? Uh, uh, Mowgli... Ha! You wouldn't marry a panther, would you?

Mowgli: Gee, I don't even know what you're talking about.

Baloo: Mowgli, don't you realize that you're a human?

Mowgli: I'm not any more, Baloo. I'm a bear like you.

Baloo: Little buddy, look. Listen to me.

Mowgli: [play fighting] Come on, Baloo.

Baloo: Mowgli, stop it now. Hold still. I wanna tell you something. Now listen to me.

Mowgli: What's the matter, ol' papa bear?

Baloo: Look, Mowgli, I've been trying to tell ya, I've been trying all morning to tell ya. I've got to take you back to the man-village!

Mowgli: The man-village?

Baloo: Now look, kid, I can explain...

Mowgli: But-but you said we were partners.

Baloo: Now believe me, kid, I...

Mowgli: You're just like... like old Bagheera!

Baloo: Now just a minute! That's going too far!

[repeated line]

Baloo: You better believe it!

Baloo: What do they call you?

Bagheera: His name is Mowgli, and I'm taking him back to the man village.

Baloo: Man village? They'll ruin him. They'll make a man out of him.

Baloo: [after the girl from the man village drops her jug of water] She did that on purpose!

Bagheera: Obviously.

Baloo: Now, look. It's like this, little britches. All you gotta do is...

Baloo: [singing] Look for the bare necessities / The simple bare necessities / Forget about your worries and your strife / I mean the bare necessities / Are Mother Nature's recipies / That bring the bare necessities of life / Wherever I wander / Wherever I roam / I couldn't be fonder / Of my big home / The bees are buzzin' in the tree / To make some honey just for me / When you look under the rocks and plants / And take a glance at the fancy ants / Then maybe try a few...

Mowgli: You eat ants?

Baloo: You better believe it. And you're gonna *love* the way they tickle.

Mowgli: [sees the girl] Look. What's that?

Bagheera: Oh, it's the man-village.

Mowgli: No, no. I mean that.

Baloo: Forget about those, they ain't nothing but trouble.

Mowgli: Just a minute. I've never seen one before.

Baloo: So you've seen one. So let's go.

Mowgli: I'll be right back. I want a better look.

Baloo: Mowgli, wait a minute.

Bagheera: Oh, Baloo. Let him have a better look.

Baloo: Ha ha! Man, that's what I call a swinging party.

Bagheera: Baloo, birds of a feather should flock together. You wouldn't marry a panther now, would you?

Baloo: I don't know.

[laughs]

Baloo: Come to think of it, no panther has ever asked me. Ha-ha.

Bagheera: [getting irritated] Baloo, you've got to be serious...

Baloo: Oh, stop worrying, Baggy! Stop worrying! I'll take care of him.

Bagheera: Yes, like you did when the monkeys kidnapped him, huh?

Baloo: Can't a guy make one mistake?

Bagheera: Not in the jungle! And another thing, sooner or later Mowgli will meet Shere Khan.

Baloo: The tiger? What's he got against the kid?

Bagheera: He hates man with a vengenance. You know that! Because he fears man's gun and man's fire.

Baloo: But little Mowgli don't have those things.

Bagheera: Shere Khan won't wait until he does. He'll get Mowgli while he's young and helpless. Just one swipe!

Baloo: Oh! Well, what... what are we going to do?

Bagheera: Do what's best for the boy.

Baloo: You better believe it! You name it, I'll do it.

Bagheera: Good. Then make Mowgli go to the man-village.

Baloo: Are you out of your mind? I promised him that he could stay here in the jungle with me.

Bagheera: Well, that's just the point! As long as he remains with you, he's in danger! So, it's up to you.

Baloo: Why me?

Bagheera: B-because he won't listen to me.

Baloo: But I love that kid.

[sniffs]

Baloo: I love him like he was my own cub!

Bagheera: Then think what's best for Mowgli, and not yourself.

Baloo: Well... well, can't... well, can't I wait until morning?

Bagheera: It's morning now. Go one Baloo.

[Baloo sighs and approaches Mowgli who is asleep]

Baloo: Oh boy!

Baloo: [Mowgli is almost at the man-village entrance] Mowgli, come back, come back!

Bagheera: [encouragingly] No, go on, go on!

Bagheera: Now, while you create a disturbance, I'll rescue Mowgli. Got that?

Baloo: [dancing away] I'm gone, man. Solid gone.

Bagheera: Not yet, Baloo!

Bagheera: You wouldn't marry a panther, would you?

Baloo: I don't know. Come to think of it, no panther ever asked me.

[Baloo is holding on to Shear Khan's tail as he's running]

Buzzie: [Flaps and Dizzy have just saved Mowgli] He's safe now. You can let go, Baloo.

Baloo: Are you kidding? There's teeth in the other end!

[at the end of "The Bare Necessities"]

Baloo: Beautiful! That's real jungle harmony.

Mowgli: I like being a bear.

Baloo: That's my boy. And you're gonna make one swell bear. Why, you even sing like one.

[the monkeys have taken Mowgli away and have tricked Baloo into falling off a cliff]

Baloo: [hollering] Bagheera! BAGHEERA!

[far away, Bagheera hears Baloo's echoing holler and Bagheera starts back]

Bagheera: Well, it's happened. It took a little longer than I thought, but it's happened.

[Baloo struggles up the cliff while Bagheera returns to the cliff where Baloo fell, just as Baloo climbs back up]

Baloo: [hollering right in Bagheera's ear] BAGHEERA!

[his echoing holler startles and stuns Bagheera, who glares at him]

Baloo: Oh, you heard me, huh?

Bagheera: Mowgli? Mowgli!

[he turns to Baloo]

Bagheera: All right, what's happened? Where's Mowgli?

Baloo: They ambushed me, thousands of 'em!

[he strikes several fighting poses as he says:]

Baloo: I jabbed with my left, then I swung with a right, and then I...

Bagheera: [exasperated] Oh, for the last time, what happened to Mowgli?

Baloo: Like I told ya, them mangy monkeys carried him off!

Bagheera: The ancient ruins? Oh, I hate to think what will happen when he meets that king of theirs.

[Baloo has told Mowgli that he has to take him back to the man-village and Mowgli runs off. Baloo calls for him, but only Bagheera answers]

Bagheera: And now what's happened?

Baloo: You're not gonna believe me, Bagheera, but look. Now I used the same words you did and he ran out on me!

Bagheera: Well, don't just stand there! Let's separate! We've got to find him.

[he runs off]

Baloo: [going off in a different direction] Oh, boy, if anything happens to that little guy, I'll never forgive myself. I've *gotta* find him!

Bagheera: [to Baloo while Mowgli sleeps after they save him from King Louie] Mowgli seems to have man's ability to get into trouble, and your influence hasn't been exactly...

Baloo: Shh!

[softly]

Baloo: Keep it down! You're gonna wake little buddy. He's had a big day. It was a sockeroo. You know, it ain't easy learning to be like me.

Bagheera: [scoffs] A disgraceful performance! Associating with those undesirable scatterbrain apes? I hope Mowgli learned something from that experience.

Mowgli: [in his sleep] Scooby-dooby, dooby-doo...

Baloo: [laughs] That's my boy.

Bagheera: Oh, nonsense.

Baloo: [scatting] Well, it's a doo-bah-dee-doo, yes, it's a doo-bah-dee-doo, I mean a doo-bee, doo-bee, doo-bee, doo-bee, doo-bee-dee-doo. And with...

[Sees Mowgli]

Baloo: Well, now. Ha ha! What have we here?

[sniffs Mowgli]

Baloo: Hmmm. Say, what a funny little bit of a...

Mowgli: [slaps Baloo in the nose] Go away!

Baloo: Oh, boy! I've seen everything in these woods. Ooh, what have I run on? What a pretty thing this is.

Mowgli: Leave me alone.

Baloo: Well, now. That's pretty big talk, little britches.

Mowgli: I'm big enough.

[starts slugging Baloo]

Baloo: Tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk. Pitiful. Hey, kid. You need help, and ol' Baloo's gonna learn ya to fight like a bear.

Baloo: He's hooked.

Bagheera: Ah, it was inevitable, Baloo. The boy couldn't help himself. It was bound to happen. Mowgli is where he belongs now.

Baloo: Yeah. I guess you're right. But I still think he'd have made one swell bear. Well, come on, Baggy, buddy. Let's get back where we belong. And get with the beat.

Buzzie: [Baloo's being dragged holding on to Shere Khan's tail] You can let go now, Baloo.

Baloo: Are you kidding? There's teeth at the other end!

Mowgli: That village was terrible. All you ever hear is rules, rules, rules and work, work, work.

Baloo: Whoa, kid. Watch your language.

Baloo: In case you haven't noticed, kid, I'm no wild animal. Except at parties.

Baloo: You want *quiet*, go back to that man village. This place is *happening*.

Baloo: Kid, show me you can still fight like a bear.

Baloo: You don't need her, kid. You're with old Baloo now.

Mowgli: Oh, Baloo! I don't ever wanna see that girl or that village again.

Baloo: Well, of course you don't. It's just us bears from here on in.

Mowgli: Yeah, man.

Baloo: Read you loud and clear kid. You wanted that girl to find you.