Tom Dreesen quotes:

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  • You have to remember, Frank Sinatra is 82 years old, which is 240 in your years. He's lived three lifetimes! He has good and bad days. He can't run ... around as fast as he used to.

  • Karaoke bars combine two of the nation's greatest evils: people who shouldn't drink with people who shouldn't sing.

  • We were so poor we had no hot water. But it didn't matter because we had no bathtub to put it in anyway.

  • My father told me marijuana would cause me brain damage - because if he caught me doing it he was going to break my head.

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