Si Robertson quotes:

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  • What I tell young couples that are getting married is: you're going to have quarrels, and on some things, you're just going to have to agree to disagree. And when you go to bed at night, kiss each other and tell each other that you love each other. Don't go to bed mad. Life is too short. Keep it simple.

  • We are the rags to riches story, okay, the Robertson's are. Okay? We had very humble beginnings. Everybody's trying to figure out what, what's behind it, and all the Robertsons say, 'Hey, it's divine intervention.' Me personally, okay, God's gonna take 'Duck Dynasty' where he wants it to go, okay, and to the people that he wants it to go to.

  • I am the MacGyver of cooking. If you bring me a piece of bread, cabbage, coconut, mustard greens, pigs feet, pine cones...and a woodpecker, I'll make you a good chicken pot pie.

  • Daddy had a farm - cows, pigs, OK, a big garden, OK? We did live off the land, and then we would supplement all that with whatever we could kill or catch. Whether we'd kill squirrels, deer, duck, or caught catfish or brim, that was what went on the table.

  • A lot of people say, 'Hey, God doesn't have a sense of humor.' Yes, He does. God has a great sense of humor.

  • I'm always just carrying a Tupperware cup, ever since my mom went to a Tupperware party and got 'em. I've left them strewn all over the U.S. and Europe. I drink iced tea out of them.

  • First it's pretty tires. Next it's pretty guns. Then the next thing you know, you're shaving your beard and wearing capri pants.

  • Christianity is why the 'Duck Dynasty' family is still together.

  • Si, the speed limit sign said 35. Your Goin' 55." -Sadie Robertson"Oh, that's just a suggestion.

  • When I started out in the duck-call business, my college buddies would come in and say, 'Robertson, you have a college degree. What are you doing?' Then they drove away saying, 'What an idiot!' Thirty-five years later, they're saying, 'The sucker's a genius!'

  • Vets are close to my heart, okay, and it's not only because I served, okay. It's because of what they go through, okay. A lot of these people have gave their lives, a lot of them have gave their limbs, okay, you know, that's a, that's a, that's a heap, you know.

  • A lot of people don't believe there's evil. If there's good in this world, then you're being intellectually dishonest, if you believe there's a good power, you've also got to believe there's an evil power, too. There are physical laws that are in place.

  • A beaver is about like the ninjas the suckers only work at night and they're hard to find.

  • One time, hey, in high school this girl told me, hey, its not you, its me.. Ofcourse its you, you dang HEFFER!

  • Victoria's got her secrets. Hey, so do I!

  • There's a lot of kids who look up to me, and that's humbling. Because being human, I don't want to fail them. But being human, I will. That's why it's so important to have your faith put in something that won't fail you. And that means the Son of God's kingdom.

  • When I go out or to an event, I'll wear blue jeans and a shirt. And sometimes when I go to an event I'll wear camouflage. It depends what kind of mood I'm in.

  • Hey, dont hate the player, hate the team.

  • The fans always ask me, 'Is Si that crazy in real life?' and I said, 'No, hey, he tones it down for television.'

  • In the winter, things are dead and dull, but then there is an explosion of life. That's what He promises people who believe in His Son. That's what all the Robertsons are banking on.

  • I'm the master of distractions. A couple of hand gestures and BAM! I'll pull the underwear clean off your butt.

  • Hey can mean anything. It can mean yes, it can mean maybe, it could mean no, it could mean next week. Hey, the bottom line is you have to understand me to understand hey.

  • You can't fix stupid. You can't fix a neutered dog you can't fix a garage door and hey, you can't fix stupid

  • I go out into America, and I am literally navigating a minefield. Godliness has become abnormal.

  • I don't know what a person does that does not have a relationship with God. When he goes to the doctor and the doctors says, 'Hey, you've got less than two months to live and there's nothing we can do for you.' Who do they turn to when you're given something that earth shattering?

  • That's what got me through 65 years of life - my belief in God and what He's done for us and what He will do for us.

  • I know all the new phrases: 'cowabunga,' 'radical,' cat's pajamas,' 'duh,' and 'hey, homie don't play that.

  • I sting like a butterfly and punch like a flea.

  • I live by my own rules (reviewed, revised, and approved by my wife).. but still my own.

  • I'm really a shy person.

  • It ain't gun control we need; it's sin control.

  • All of my stories are 95 percent truthful.

  • Everybody thinks I'm the weirdo in the family.

  • Everybody when they saw it, they said, "Did Willie Nelson sign your hat?" I'd say, "No, that'd be Willie Knucklehead - Robertson, OK?" We were at an event for the fans and I took my hat off and set it down on the couch, and he signed it. I said, "What are you doing, idiot?" He said, "Look, I was in the zone, and you just happened to put your hat in my zone."

  • Everything I say is 95% truthful.

  • Fred Astaire's got nothing on me.

  • God has taken four guys that look like five miles of muddy road and made them famous in the TV world.

  • Hey, I'm like Aretha Franklin, I don't get no R -S -P -E -C -T around here!

  • I don't know any redneck that's not into fun. That's their middle name: Red-Fun-Neck.

  • I messed up on the Vietnam Special, because I gave it to civilians? Only military men can handle that.

  • I was in my tighty-whities and I never woke up, and I ran over a mile.

  • I was largely drinking to forget where I was. When you're in a place like Vietnam, you get to a point where you don't care any more. You're in a place that's foreign to you, and you know for a fact that many people there hate you and will kill you if they get the chance. It really does something to your mind to know that many of the people living around you don't like you and want you to die.

  • Ice will ruin the tea. Waters it down. You can always get ice, or carry your ice in an ice container. You don't want to put it in your tea, it'll water it down.

  • If you kill it, you gotta grill it, so to speak.

  • I'm like a fine-tuned race car. You've got to make frequent pit stops when you drink as much tea as I do.

  • I'm like an owl... I don't give a HOOT!

  • I'm so dope I'm illegal in 55 states

  • In the military it was camouflage for the desert or the winter. And now it's the duck hunting colors - I think it's "real tree." It's comfortable. It's stuff that's made out of comfortable material, OK, and I'm comfortable in it.

  • I've worn it to church before. Camouflage and the other clothes.

  • My father, OK, when we first got old enough to hunt, this was his rule: If you shoot it, you come home and eat it. Otherwise you do not shoot it, OK? You don't just kill something for the sake of killing it, OK? If you kill it, you gotta grill it, so to speak.

  • My wife asked me about that: "What happened to your beard?" I said, "What are you talking about?" She said, "Hey, the right side is shorter than the left." I said, "You gotta be kidding me." So I went in there and looked, and I combed it out and I said, "I don't know, that's just the way it grows."

  • Nap time would become a national pastime. A man needs his beauty rest!

  • Never insult a mans beard, you either get thunder or lightning

  • People don't realize where unsweet tea came from. During the war they had to ration sugar, so then everybody just had to drink bitter tea, or unsweet.

  • People say, "Look, your book [Tales and Wisdom from Duck Dynasty's Favorite Uncle] is about tall tales." And I said, "No, you don't understand, OK? The book is tall tales, OK, by me. But look, those tall tales are my life, OK? And look, I added some spices in there. That's the five percent. You know the one about the wolves chasing me? The only thing about that - they wasn't wolves, they was coyotes".

  • Some people say I'm a dreamer, others say, 'If you fall asleep at work again we're going to have to let you go'.

  • Sometimes, our greatest strengths can be found while trusting God through our greatest obstacles.

  • The first thing I'd do [as a president] is de-regulate about 90-percent of the things that they've got regulation on, OK, including duck hunting. We're way over-regulated on everything.

  • They got some people that are saying, hey, elect me as president. Hey, Washington couldn't handle Si Robertson. Trust me.

  • We killed our own hogs, we killed our own beef, we raised our own vegetables, which Mama canned. We did live off the land.

  • When I sign people's stuff I put down John 3:16 and 17. Most people can tell you what 16 says, OK. 'For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten son.' But they don't know nothin' about 17. It says Jesus didn't come to condemn us. If anybody had a right to condemn someone, it would be the son of God. If he didn't do it, then hey, we definitely are not qualified to do it.

  • When I sign people's stuff, I put down John 3:16 and 17.

  • When security comes, every man for himself

  • You can't spell squirrel without si, and that's me.

  • You can't teach an old dog new dog new tricks. Now,you can give an old dog new toys. And we've got one here!

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