Robert A. Heinlein quotes:

Love is that condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own... Jealousy is a disease, love is a healthy condition. The immature mind often mistakes one for the other, or assumes that the greater the love, the greater the jealousy.

A competent and self-confident person is incapable of jealousy in anything. Jealousy is invariably a symptom of neurotic insecurity.

Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.

Political tags - such as royalist, communist, democrat, populist, fascist, liberal, conservative, and so forth - are never basic criteria. The human race divides politically into those who want people to be controlled and those who have no such desire.

I am free because I know that I alone am morally responsible for everything I do. I am free, no matter what rules surround me. If I find them tolerable, I tolerate them; if I find them too obnoxious, I break them. I am free because I know that I alone am morally responsible for everything I do.

Be wary of strong drink. It can make you shoot at tax collectors... and miss.

When a place gets crowded enough to require ID's, social collapse is not far away. It is time to go elsewhere. The best thing about space travel is that it made it possible to go elsewhere.

An armed society is a polite society. Manners are good when one may have to back up his acts with his life.

When any government, or any church for that matter, undertakes to say to its subjects, This you may not read, this you must not see, this you are forbidden to know, the end result is tyranny and oppression no matter how holy the motives.

One could write a history of science in reverse by assembling the solemn pronouncements of highest authority about what could not be done and could never happen.

The difference between science and the fuzzy subjects is that science requires reasoning while those other subjects merely require scholarship.

By cultivating the beautiful we scatter the seeds of heavenly flowers, as by doing good we cultivate those that belong to humanity.

One man's 'magic' is another man's engineering. 'Supernatural' is a null word.

To be matter-of-fact about the world is to blunder into fantasy - and dull fantasy at that, as the real world is strange and wonderful.

I don't see how an article of clothing can be indecent. A person, yes.

May you live as long as you wish and love as long as you live.

In the absence of clearly-defined goals, we become strangely loyal to performing daily trivia until ultimately we become enslaved by it.

There is no way that writers can be tamed and rendered civilized or even cured. The only solution known to science is to provide the patient with an isolation room, where he can endure the acute stages in private and where food can be poked in to him with a stick.

The supreme irony of life is that hardly anyone gets out of it alive.

You can have peace. Or you can have freedom. Don't ever count on having both at once.

Being a mother is an attitude, not a biological relation.

If Satan should ever replace God he would find it necessary to assume the attributes of Divinity."

Sex without love is merely healthy exercise.

Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of, but do it in private and wash your hands afterwards.

Customs tell a man who he is, where he belongs, what he must do. Better illogical customs than none; men cannot live together without them. From an anthropologist's view, 'justice' is a search for workable customs.

There is no such thing as luck; there is only adequate or inadequate preparation to cope with a statistical universe.

I never learned from a man who agreed with me.

Violence, naked force, has settled more issues in history than has any other factor.

A woman is not property, and husbands who think otherwise are living in a dreamworld.

The only religious opinion I feel sure of is this: self-awareness is not just a bunch of amino acids bumping together.

Beware of altruism. It is based on self-deception, the root of all evil.

We learned not to waste ammo even on warriors except in self-protection

One man's theology is another man's belly laugh.

Take big bites. Anything worth doing is worth overdoing.

Money is a powerful aphrodisiac but flowers work almost as well.

Almost everything about a human creature is ridiculous, except its ability to suffer bravely and die gallantly for whatever it loves and believes in. The validity of that belief, the appropriateness of that love, is irrelevant; it is the bravery and the gallantry that count.

A great artist can look at an old woman, portray her exactly as she is ... and force the viewer to see the pretty girl she used to be ... more than that, he can make anyone with the sensitivity of an armadillo see that this lovely young girl is still alive

There are hidden contradictions in the minds of people who "love Nature" while deploring the "artificialities" with which "Man has spoiled Nature.'" The obvious contradiction lies in their choice of words, which imply that Man and his artifacts are not part of "Nature" : but beavers and their dams are.

No statement should be believed because it is made by an authority.

Evolution is a process that never stops. Baboons who fail to exhibit moral behavior do not survive; they wind up as meat for leopards.

Little girls, like butterflies, need no excuse,

A dying culture invariably exhibits personal rudeness. Bad manners. Lack of consideration for others in minor matters. A loss of politeness, of gentle manners, is more significant than is a riot...

A human being should be able to change a diaper, plan an invasion, butcher a hog, conn a ship, design a building, write a sonnet, balance accounts, build a wall, set a bone, comfort the dying, take orders, give orders, cooperate, act alone, solve equations, analyze a new problem, pitch manure, program a computer, cook a tasty meal, fight efficiently, die gallantly. Specialization is for insects.

Always listen to experts. They'll tell you what can't be done, and why. Then do it.

Courage is the complement of fear. A man who is fearless cannot be courageous. [He is also a fool.]

Being generous is inborn; being altruistic is a learned perversity. No resemblance --

Being sorry won't get you into heaven. Get happy, son. Get that old spring into your step and stay on your toes.

I don't see why human people make such a heavy trip out of sex. It isn't anything complex, it is simply the best thing in life, even better than food.

Nothing of value is free. Even the breath of life is purchased at birth only through gasping effort and pain... The best things in life are beyond money; their price is agony and sweat and devotion... and the price demanded for the most precious of all things in life is life itself--ultimate cost for perfect value

Theology is never any help; it is searching in a dark cellar at midnight for a black cat that isn't there. Theologians can persuade themselves of anything.

Consider the black widow spider. It's a timid little beastie, useful and, for my taste, the prettiest of the arachnids, with its shiny, patent-leather finish and its red hourglass trademark. But the poor thing has the fatal misfortune of possessing enormously too much power for its size. So everybody kills it on sight.

What is supposed to happen in a democracy is that each sovereign citizen will always vote in the public interest for the safety and welfare of all. But what does happen is that he votes his own self-interest as he sees it... which for the majority translates as 'Bread and Circuses'.

Nursing does not diminish the beauty of a woman's breasts; it enhances their charm by making them look lived in and happy.

Who is more real? Homer or Ulysses? Shakespeare or Hamlet? Burroughs or Tarzan?

Butterflies are self propelled flowers.

Don't tell me violence doesn't solve anything. Look at Carthage.

Violence never settles anything should be debated by the ghosts of Hitler and Stalin, with the city fathers of Carthage as referees.

I'm afraid of coaching, of writer's classes, of writer's magazines, of books on how to write. They give me centipede trouble - you know the yarn about the centipede who was asked how he managed all his feet? He tried to answer, stopped to think about it, and was never able to walk another step.

On the steps of the Federal Building we ran into Carmencita Ibanez, a classmate of ours and one of the nice things about being a member of a race with two sexes.

Take care of the cojones and the frijoles will take care of themselves. Try to have getaway money - but don't be fanatic about it.

Democracy is four wolves and a sheep voting on dinner.

The power to tax, once conceded, has no limits; it continues until it destroys.

Every Congressman, every Senator knows precisely what causes inflation... but can't, [won't] support the drastic reforms to stop it [repeal of the Federal Reserve Act] because it could cost him his job.

The universe never did make sense; I suspect it was built on government contract.

Formal courtesy between husband and wife is even more important than it is between strangers.

Art is the process of evoking pity and terror, which is not abstract at all but very human. What the self-styled modern artists are doing is a sort of unemotional pseudointellectual masturbation . . . whereas creative art is more like intercourse, in which the artist must seduce -- render emotional -- his audience, each time.

A critic is a man who creates nothing and thereby feels qualified to judge the work of creative men. There is logic in this; he is unbiased, he hates all creative people equally.

It is a truism that almost any sect, cult, or religion will legislate its creeds into law if it acquires the political power to do so, and will follow it by suppressing opposition, subverting all education to seize early the minds of the young, and by killing, locking up, or driving underground all heretics.

It is a truism that almost any sect, cult, or religion will legislate its creed into law if it acquires the political power to do so.

The future is better than the past. Despite the crepe hangers, romanticists, and anti-intellectuals, the world steadily grows better because the human mind, applying itself to environment, makes it better. With hands ... with tools ... with horse sense and science and engineering.

History does not record anywhere at any time a religion that has any rational basis. Religion is a crutch for people not strong enough to stand up to the unknown without help. But, like dandruff, most people do have a religion and spend time and money on it and seem to derive considerable pleasure from fiddling with it.

One should not attend even the end of the world without a good breakfast.

Ability is a wonderful thing, but its value is greatly enhanced by dependability. Ability implies repeatability and accountability.

The most noble fate a man can endure is to place his own mortal body between his loved home and the war's desolation.

There was one field in which man was unsurpassed; he showed unlimited ingenuity in devising bigger and more efficient ways to kill off, enslave, harass, and in all ways make an unbearable nuisance of himself to himself.

A human being should be able to change a diaper, plan an invasion, (cont. Specialization is for insects.

Circumstances can force your hand. So think ahead!

Revolution is an art that I pursue rather than a goal I expect to achieve. Nor is this a source of dismay; a lost cause can be as spiritually satisfying as a victory.

There is an old, old story about a theologian who was asked to reconcile the Doctrine of Divine Mercy with the doctrine of infant damnation. 'The Almighty,' he explained, 'finds it necessary to do things in His official and public capacity which in His private and personal capacity He deplores.

That old saw about the early bird just proves that the worm should have stayed in bed.

Progress isn't made by early risers. It's made by lazy men trying to find easier ways to do something.

The best thing about space travel is that it made it possible to go elsewhere.

It may take endless wars and unbearable population pressure to force-feed a technology to the point where it can cope with space. In the universe, space travel may be the normal birth pangs of an otherwise dying race. A test. Some races pass, some fail.

...revolutions are not won by enlisting the masses. Revolution is a science for the few who are competent to practice it. It depends on correct organisation and above all, on communications.

Happiness consists in getting enough sleep. Just that, nothing more.

People simplify 'Apollonian' into 'mild', and 'calm', and 'cool'. But 'Apollonian' and 'Dionysian' are two sides of one coin--a nun kneeling in her cell, holding perfectly still, can be in ecstacy more frenzied than any priestess of Pan Priapus celebrating the vernal equinox.

Love is that condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own.

In Wilson's scale of evaluations breakfast rated just after life itself and ahead of the chance of immortality.

Everybody lies about sex.

Men are expendable; women and children are not. A tribe or a nation can lose a high percentage of its men and still pick up the pieces and go on ... as long as the women and children are saved.

Of all the strange 'crimes' that human beings have legislated out of nothing, 'blasphemy' is the most amazing -- with 'obscenity' and 'indecent exposure' fighting it out for second and third place.

A family reunion is an effective form of birth control.

I have never been able to see how a thirty-year old moron can vote more wisely than a fifteen-year old genius...

Mighty little force is needed to control a man whose mind has been hoodwinked; contrariwise, no amount of force can control a free man, a man whose mind is free. No, not the rack, not fission bombs, not anything - you can't conquer a free man; the most you can do is kill him.

It is impossible for anyone to be responsible for another person's behavior. The most you or any leader can do is to encourage each one to be responsible for himself.

One of the sanest, surest, and most generous joys of life comes from being happy over the good fortune of others.

Fulfillment in life is loving a good woman and killing a bad man.

In the eighty or ninety years I have given to this subject, trying to trace out the meanderings of their twisty little minds, the only thing that I have learned for certain about women is that when a gal is gonna, she's gonna. All a man can do is cooperate with the inevitable.

Why do some people act as if making money offended their delicate minds? I am out for a legitimate profit, and not ashamed of it; the fact that people will pay money for my goods and services shows that my work is useful.

It's an indulgence to sit in a room and discuss your beliefs as if they were a juicy piece of gossip.

If a grasshopper tries to fight a lawnmower, one may admire his courage but not his judgement.

Of all the nonsense that twists the world, the concept of 'altruism' is the worst. People do what they want to, every time. If it pains them to make a choice - if the choice looks like a 'sacrifice' - you can be sure that it is no nobler than the discomfort caused by greediness... the necessity of deciding between two things you want when you can't have both.

There are no dangerous weapons; there are only dangerous men.

Pacifism is a shifty doctrine under which a man accepts the benefits of the social group without being willing to pay; and claims a halo for his dishonesty.

Don't handicap your children by making their lives easy.

First you must learn to control your self. The rest follows. Blessed is he who knows himself and commands himself, for the world is his and love and happiness and peace walk with him wherever he goes.

A long and wicked life followed by five minutes of perfect grace gets you into Heaven. An equally long life of decent living and good works followed by one outburst of taking the name of the lord in vain- then have a heart attack at that moment and be damned for eternity. Is that the system?

Love is what still goes on when you're not horny.

Heroism' often consists in keeping your head in an emergency and doing the best you can with what you have instead of panicking and being shot in the tail. People who fight this way win more battles than do intentional heroes; a glory hound often throws away the lives of his mates as well as his own.

Never underestimate the power of human stupidity.

Never attribute to malice that which can be adequately explained by stupidity. Never underestimate the power of human stupidity.

Sin lies only in hurting others unnecessarily. All other "sins" are invented nonsense.

Everything is theoretically impossible, until it is done.

There is no worse tyranny than to force a man to pay for what he does not want merely because you think it would be good for him.

Cats have no sense of humor, they have terribly inflated egos, and they are very touchy.

Never insult anyone by accident.

Avoid making irrevocable decisions while tired or hungry.

It may be better to be a live jackal than a dead lion, but it is better still to be a live lion. And usually easier.

The faith in which I was brought up assured me that I was better than other people; I was saved, they were damned.... Our hymns were loaded with arrogance - self-congratulation on how cozy we were with the Almighty and what a high opinion he had of us, what hell everybody else would catch come Judgment Day.

Come Judgment Day, we may find that Mumbo Jumbo the God of the Congo was the Big Boss all along.