Michele Jaffe quotes:

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  • YES. BECAUSE THAT'S HOW I ROLL. LIKE A SUAVE THING. In fact, from here on, please forward my mail to 1 Suave Hill, Suave Boulevard, Suavieland, Planet of She's-So-Smooth-I-Can't-Believe-She's-Not-Butter.

  • talking to yourself again, jas? yes, it beats talking to you. oh, time machine back to first grade much? only to visit your brain.

  • Because after the haze of not being kissed cleared I was forced to face the facts that: 1. Jack was a very bad guy. 2. Jack had threatened Fred. 3. Just thinking that he was going to kiss me made me tingly everywhere 4. In a way no other guy had 5. And that was without our mouths even touching 6. Which meant that 7. If they did 8. Wooohoo baby! 9. Except that it did not matter 10. At all 11. Because he was plotting against fred 12. And I was complicit in whatever he planned if I didn't tell Mr. Curtis 13. And I was trapped in a boat with a woman singing showtunes.

  • Little Life Lesson 51: When selecting a member of a group to put on the Endangered Species List, it's probably best not to pick the least popular person, because there is always a chance everyone will shrug and be like, "Um, okay. Hey, anyone want pizza?" and leave.

  • I didn't mean to interupt you if you were looking for your friends Miss--' 'Callihan,' but you can call my Jasmine. Or Jas.' Or Snookums. Honeybunch. Hotsie Totsie Cowgirl. My Little-- 'It's nice to meet you Jasmine, I'm Jack.

  • that was the plan? part of it, you don't wan tot know the rest. i believe the word 'these dog colllars would make excellent restraints' were involved. it was a brilliant idea. and we only got really cute well-made collars. this is my favorite. we had the tag engraved to say BUBBA.

  • favor de dejar un especimim em este copa para el doctor what? she told you to pee in a cup, i think that means get lost

  • Popularity can be a real headache.

  • I didn't mean to interupt you if you were looking for your friends Miss--''Callihan,' but you can call my Jasmine. Or Jas.' Or Snookums. Honeybunch. Hotsie Totsie Cowgirl. My Little--'It's nice to meet you Jasmine, I'm Jack."

  • ...Go live ITM." ITM?" In the Mo," Beth elaborated.

  • Don't let them make you doubt yourself. All the greatest visionaries in history have been told they were insane at some point.

  • i never thought of it before, but with your height and build, you are going to look SO CUTE in your straitjacket.

  • I was thinking that maybe when everything around you changed all the time, it was nice to know that something would always be the same

  • You can only run away from a house. Home is something you run toward.

  • I think it shows that sometimes for one person to keep breathing, something else has to stop." (hardcover page 37)

  • little life lesson 23: before making a snide comment about someone else's outfit, check to see if you're wearing knee boots with fringe. if you answer yes, drop it. just do.

  • And we'd look at each other the way you do when you see someone on the street you think you recognize, but not quite. Someone you wish with all your heart were there but who is actually just a stranger. And you feel a kind of deep longing that hurts like a huge gash and your inability to fix it leaves you frustrated and angry and bone-deep lonely.

  • For some reason my father saw no problem with us pplaying "barbie and ken go to hawaii to save their marriage by picking up another couple for sexy good times," but if barbie and ken had gone to hawaii to "rescue another couple from a crazed kidnapper," that would have been wrong.

  • It's so nice to have sane friends. I imagine.

  • that arctic blast you're feeling? it's the chill coming off my cold shoulder

  • Thinking, not for the first time, that life should come with a trapdoor. Just a little exit hatch you could disappear through when you´d utterly and completely mortified yourself. Or when you had spontaneous zit eruptions. "Good book?" he asked, taking it from her and reading the subtitle, "A Guide for Good Girls Who (Sometimes) Want to Be Bad," out loud. But life did not come with a trapdoor.

  • You talk more when you're nervous," he said, still standing close to her. "No i don't. That's absurd. I'm just trying to explain to you-" "Do i make you nervous?" "No. I'm not nervous." "You're trembling." "I'm cold. I'm wearing practically zero clothes." His glance went to her lips, then back to her eyes. "I noticed.

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