Mary J. Blige quotes:

Really, every woman is an example to me, because as women we go through so much pain. We have to live this perfect life when we are messed up inside. We all go through trials and tribulations.

I have to have lemon and honey. I have to have apple cider vinegar, Braggs. And I have to have either Red Vines or Twizzlers. These things, you know, are the things that help my vocal performance.

I wish I had known that education is the key. That knowledge is power. Now I pick up books and watch educational shows with my husband. I'm seeing how knowledge can elevate you.

I used to think I was ugly. I thought I looked like a camel. A person who doesn't love themselves, they will see anything that pops up on their face. I've seen squirrels, I've seen a bird, and I've seen all kinds of animals on my face. But that is the result of self-hate. I've learned to say: 'You know what? I am a beautiful black woman'.

Music makes us want to live. You don't know how many times people have told me that they'd been down and depressed and just wanted to die. But then a special song caught their ear and that helped give them renewed strength. That's the power music has.

When someone comes up to me and says, 'Mary, you helped save my marriage', or, 'Mary, you helped me get out of this abusive relationship', I'm in it, really in their lives. And I'm so passionate about my feelings, but also about showing people the way through theirs.

I don't have any health problems, but to keep your health improves your quality of life.

I don't know. Only God knows where the story ends for me, but I know where the story begins. It's up to us to choose, whether we win or lose and I choose to win.

Thank you so much for supporting me from the day I stepped foot into the music industry. It really means something to me to have Maya Angelou speak on my behalf. It also means a lot to have Oprah on my speed dial!

You can look at my palm and see the storm coming. Read the book of my life and see I've overcome it.

I barely have time for my own children. To adopt more children and not have time for them, that would be poor parenting on my part.

As a child I always wanted to be a singer. The music my mother played in the house moved me - Aretha Franklin, Chaka Khan, Mahalia Jackson. It was truly spiritual. It made you understand what God was. We are all spirits. We get depressed. But music makes you want to live. I know my music has saved my life.

You can't get around pain and opposition, but you can try to be joyful in the trial, and thank yourself for the trial, and thank God for the strength to get through it.

Life is full of trials and tribulations. It's dramatic when you don't treat people right when you're in the tribulations, but I know now how to get out of it. You have to make a decision to say 'No more', and then you know what to do when the trials happen.

I've been praying to God to show me how to forgive myself. Because... maybe... that's the thing I've been searching for.

I believe there should be no more drama, but it's everywhere you go. It's just about how you get out. You've gotta bob and weave because it's everywhere. How do I keep the drama low? It's about using your head.

I didn't know how to show my self love, and I didn't want anyone else to hurt me. So my tough girl attitude was like, 'I'm not having it.'

I don't think there's anything they can say about me that I haven't said about myself already. And I would be an absolute total liar, and my fans would not respect me, if I said that my life and my marriage are perfect. But we absolutely love each other; we have fun together - it's great.

By the time I was a teenager, when I went outside the house, it was about hip-hop all the time. Nothing but hip-hop, block parties.

Yonkers made me strong and made me believe in myself, because so many people would doubt you and not believe. There are people that would believe in you, but the environment was so harsh, nobody wanted you to get out, you know?

I just want fans to walk away knowing that no matter what's going on, no matter how happy you are, no matter how sad you are, we did it. We're strong in this. We've come a long way, and life is not just one thing.

I remember a time when all my fans were crying and sad and going through hell. Now, we're trying to uplift each other and accept ourselves for who we are, even if nobody else does.

I believe that anything man himself can do for me, God can do for me in a greater way. I decided to pray and to seek God on my own. I just stayed in The Word. And it worked.

When I was a child I didn't care about getting an education, and I didn't finish high school.

Nowadays, with the state of the music business, for any artist, whether you're up-and-coming or you've been in it for awhile, you have to explore different revenues and different ways of expressing yourself.

Two hurt people can not help each other. They can not.

I cannot save the world; that's not what I'm trying to do. I guess I'm just trying to walk the walk and be an example to those that want it. Not everybody does, but if Mary J. Blige can come out of that same hole you were in, then you can do it, too - that's my goal: to do that without saying it, but actually live it.

People know what they see but they don't know what's happening inside. If you want to know who you are and how you feel about yourself, take a look at your environment.

I think women should band together to get us more respect in all the businesses that we're in because, you know, if we turn 40, we're nothing and nobody. We all should band together and just say we're not gonna go down like that.

I suffered from self hatred so much. It's like I didn't want to look like that any more. I didn't to feel like that any more. It had to be another way.

My main exercise is cardio. The treadmill is fine, but running outdoors gives me the best results. I try to log 6 to 8 miles a week. I could be in the worst mood, but when I do my cardio, I feel much, much better.

I grew up watching MTV, when Journey was huge, when Pat Benatar had 'Love Is a Battlefield,' and my friends and I used to cut school to watch this woman in the video. We loved Pat Benatar.

I still get nervous about singing. I drink tea with honey and lemon before every concert. And I need to have scented candles in all of my hotel rooms.

When you know what pain is, and when you have to make a choice, you learn that it is a decision. People think it's a fairytale thing, love and happiness, but you have to work hard. And then - you feel it deeply.

So as long as I'm a human being and I'm not perfect, I'm able to say I'm having some growing pains. Because in order to sustain where you are once you made such a breakthrough that everyone is looking at you, now everyone is like, 'Ooh, is she gonna make a mistake?' Yes, I'm going to make a mistake. Yes, I'm still gonna do things.

I truly enjoy Bono. I think he is an amazing person; I love him.

God comes first - if I don't love him, I can't love anybody, and if I can't love me I can't love nobody.

I believe there are certain things that God uses to get us out of a bad situation, and I believe music was one of the things he used for me.

For the first time in my life, I'm proud of myself.

I wish I had an extra day with my mom sometimes. Or another hour in the day with my family, husband and children.

You demand respect and you'll get it. First of all, you give respect.

I like to do interior design, I love to quilt, I love to see different colors together, and I love to match things up.

If you're here right now in your life, your journey continues and you've lived to tell the story.

There's so many things that life is, and no matter how many breakthroughs, trials will exist and we're going to get through it. Just be strong.

In the inner city, there's a mentality that the government owes you something. My breakthrough came when I stopped feeling sorry for myself and took responsibility for every part of my life. No more pity parties. I've gotta love me more than anybody else loves me.

Just don't let the hype of what people are saying and how much they love you, y'know, just take the compliment and be thankful that people are complimenting you, but don't let it consume you; don't let your circumstances around you and the way people view you make you act a certain way.

I don't listen to people's opinions. I have people around me who I can trust, but most of all I listen to myself.

When you tell your truth, you are coming from a real place, so you are automatically a leader.

I can't just make a song people can dance in a club to... it still has to be real.

I don't think I'll do foster care or adopt, to be quite honest.

As a kid, I dreamed about being onstage.

Believe in yourself when nobody else does.

I'm a child of God. God is my mommy, my daddy. That's the only thing that'll keep my head up. If I don't remember who I am in him, I'm done.

I listen to gospel music.

I've just been growing right along. It's painful, but it's a great pain, and I like suffering for great results. It's like going to the gym. It hurts really bad at first, but after a couple of months and after that diet, you're looking so hot.

Once you climb to another level, you have to figure out how to sustain it.

It's not just songs and glamour. It's sweat, blood, broken toes, and mistakes... It's life.

I hated myself for so many reasons, and I thought so many things were my fault that happened to me growing up.

If we didn't have understanding of our journey, we wouldn't be able to go on. We'd be stuck, like, 'Why me?'

Without your health, everything else means nothing.

I never do any album to beat it. I do it to extend it.

I just love food, period.

I was inspired to create 'My Life' so I could finally share a personal part of my life beyond my music.

One day I realized that I wasn't getting anywhere by blaming other people for my circumstances. I finally understood: Even if you feel someone has wronged you or owes you something, no one is going to give you anything for free.

My God is a God who wants me to have things. He wants me to bling. He wants me to be the hottest thing on the block.

I can go out raw with nothing, and my fans would still be happy, but I feel that I owe it to them to give them almost like a Broadway musical at this point in my life. I have to give them something more, so I do have to think of different ways to do it.

Negative words are powerful boomerangs so be careful what you say about people and yourself.

When you come from so many damaged places you don't ever want to spiral back there, so you gotta continue to check yourself.

You have to create different things, either through lighting or changing the format of the songs and how you're going to sing them, and even sometimes props.

I like French fries; I like mashed. I love potatoes.

I can tell you I didn't feel good when I could not articulate properly. Getting my GED was important and I want other women to feel that.

Growing up, I was the preferred hairstylist for all of my friends.

I know who I am. I am not perfect. I'm not the most beautiful woman in the world. But I'm one of them.

In your life there's peaks and valleys and sometimes we regress, and we don't even know we regress. You just have to learn how to accept all of your mistakes and learn to love yourself again.

There's not enough time to be disrespecting... Life is too short.

The only person that I'm really feeling - because she has an identity of her own, even though she has listened to Mary J. Blige - is Jill Scott.

No one intimidates me because I'm not trying to do what you do, because I can't do what you do. I can only do what Mary J. Blige can do, so that relaxes me right there, and it gets me out of the competition and that whole thing.

The younger Mary J. Blige, I would call her, she was very unaware, ignorant.

I'm my worst critic, and I like the fact that I can listen to myself now and make fun of myself, listen, make changes - 'Oh, man, that's messed up. Okay, I need to work on that; I need to work on this.'

When I was five years old I was molested and just, you know. I remember feeling, literally right before it happened, I just could not believe that this person was going to do this to me. That thing followed me all my life. The shame of thinking my molestation was my fault - it led me to believe I wasn't worth anything.

I don't want no drama in my life, even though we have a little bit, but no more letting people control you. That's drama, because then you become something that you're not.

Working in the studio is a more personal experience whereas on stage in front of a billion people, its more exciting performing live.

Time on my hands since you been away boy I ain't got no plans, no no no no.

I've been a tomboy my whole life. But then you get older, you get married, you soften up.

When life is real, it's not going to be smooth.

It's challenging to find an identity as a young person if you don't have the sustenance of love, because you're being shipped around.

Don't give up, be positive and if you know someone who knows someone at a record company don't stop beating down their door till you get heard. Don't ever say it'll never happen or it'll never happen.

If you're looking for inner peace from the outside world, you're not going to get that. The inner peace starts with looking at you from the inside. Understanding that everything that comes to you is what you are. Everything from friends to boyfriends to the job you get - it's all a direct reflection of what you are on the inside.

My first album is playful.

It's up to us to choose whether we win or lose...and I choose to win.

From being a little girl in the projects, going through all of the mess that I was going through, to ending up at the Inauguration for the first African-American president, I'm speechless right now because I never thought I'd - I never ever - I couldn't even see that far. Even when I ended up in the music business, I couldn't see that.

I can have as many bad days as anyone. But I choose to say, 'I'm just fine.'

I felt ashamed about everything. Me dropping out of high school, me not, you know, just not being beautiful enough. I just didn't feel like I was smart enough or beautiful enough, you know, for years.

I do consider myself part of black history.

It hurts when you have to smile and you don't want to smile, but the best thing to do is to smile.

I've done well, I've been disappointed, and I think it all goes back to you. Of course the labels are going to be the labels. It's the music business. You are a business. That's what they do. So you've got to protect yourself.

I always want to be a messenger, a person that, you know, that's not afraid to pass on wisdom.

The music business is not a good place for people who don't know things.

My journey continues, because I've, you know, conquered a lot. And I know how to conquer the rest.

Sometimes I frown and I don't realise it.

If you're not confident in yourself, you're going to waver. I've wavered, and I've lost.

So many people are like, 'I'm perfect.' I'm so imperfect; that's why I'm able to let everything out and let people see everything. 'Cause I'm just a mess like every other person that's a mess out there.

Even if you feel someone has wronged you or owes you something, no one is going to give you anything for free.

I like hanging out with me, and I've accepted everything about me good, bad whatever it is. That's why I'm able to, that's why no one can tell me anything negative about myself.

You know a lot, but you don't know everything.

I'm on my way to a place where I'd never dreamed I'd be, and that's perfection.

It's OK showing yourself some love.

You can hate me. You can go out there and say anything you want about me, But you will love me later because I told you the truth.

As a kid, I was in love with Michael Jackson, and I just knew I was going to marry him someday.

I started speaking about what I was dealing with through my music, and 4 million women responded and said, 'Us too, Mary.' And I didn't know that everyone was hurting like I was hurting. I had no idea.

...I would be a liar and my fans would hate me if I said to them, 'Oh, we're perfect and everything is great.' We have situations just like everyone else. We're not out in public trying to kill each other, but it's real. We love each other.

As far as men go, they never gave me a chance to be me; they were always scared that somebody was going to take me.

Cause I'm no better than you, you, or you. And I can't get on no throne and preach, 'cause I'm not God.

Don't go a full day or night without washing your face. You have to get all the dirt and makeup out of your pores.

Everything is scary if you look at it. So you just got to live.

For the first time in my life, I'm proud of myself

I blame my mother for nothing, but forgive her for everything.

I care about me now. When I didn't care about me, I was, like, 'Why is this going wrong? Why is my life so bad?' But when you don't care about yourself, nobody else is going to care about you. So I learned to love myself, even if nobody else does.

I decided to start my own label because so many people with talent come to me wanting to know how they can get in the music business.

I didn't never have to go to a therapist. I just always put it in a song and you heard me.