John Candy quotes:

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  • Hey, I stopped smoking cigarettes. Isn't that something? I'm on to cigars now. I'm on to a five-year plan. I eliminated cigarettes, then I go to cigars, then I go to pipes, then I go to chewing tobacco, then I'm on to that nicotine gum

  • I know what I have to do if I want to lose weight and stay healthy: eat a proper diet and exercise. All I've got to do is apply it.

  • I did the 'Tonight Show' once, and I choked up. I get intimidated.

  • I thought to myself, Join the army. It's free. So I figured while I'm here I'll lose a few pounds.

  • Six bucks and my right nut says we're not landing in Chicago.

  • Wherever you go in the world, you just have to say you're Canadian and people laugh

  • Who wants an orange whip? Orange whip? Orange whip? Three orange whips.

  • Whoever said nothing is impossible obviously hasn't tried nailing Jell-O to a tree.

  • As long as you can savor the humorous aspect of misery and misfortune, you can overcome anything.

  • You know, the finest line a man will walk is between success at work and success at home.

  • Like your job. Love your wife.

  • I don't watch my movies. I just get too critical of myself.

  • I'm the one who has to look in the mirror, and after a while it begins to eat at you.

  • You wanna hurt me? Go right ahead if it makes you feel any better. I'm an easy target. Yeah, you're right, I talk too much. I also listen too much. I could be a cold-hearted cynic like you... but I don't like to hurt people's feelings. Well, you think what you want about me; I'm not changing. I like... I like me. My wife likes me. My customers like me. 'Cause I'm the real article. What you see is what you get.

  • If you're not happy without it, you'll never be happy with it.

  • I'm a mog: half man, half dog. I'm my own best friend!

  • I think I may have become an actor to hide from myself. You can escape into a character.

  • You can escape into a character.

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