Jessica Simpson quotes:

I want to do the romantic comedies. You know, the stuff that Meg Ryan and Julia Roberts or Reese Witherspoon would choose, of course.

I think there's a difference between ditzy and dumb. Dumb is just not knowing. Ditzy is having the courage to ask!

Am I eating chicken or tuna?

I love watching people's dreams come true.

I am the first person to go to Barnes & Noble and buy the new self-help book. I like to fill out the surveys, then I get my friends' opinions on how I answered to see if I was being honest with myself or not.

I don't ever really feel that wearing my wedding ring is what determines me being married or not.

It's important to fall in love with someone you don't want to change.

Motherhood is a dream. It really is absolutely amazing.

To be a mentor for up-and-coming artists is right up my alley.

I'm interested in learning more about myself and what I value in myself and letting that be the beautiful part of me, rather than putting on the makeup or wearing the right designer.

There's nothing worse than being disappointed in somebody.

Image is the most important thing about someone's career and longevity.

If I'm going for advice for anything in my life, I go straight to my father because he has the answers.

Both of my grandmothers were diagnosed with breast cancer - one is a survivor and one passed away.

When I walk through an airport and people go, 'You're not fat!' I'm like, 'Thanks. That's great. Good to know I'm not fat today! Thank you!'

It really is about the heart of a woman that makes her beautiful.

You're never going to look perfect to yourself even if you might look perfect to somebody else.

I love religion.

I want to be a role model.

I don't ever wanna come across too intimidating, so as long as I look like you can come up and give me a hug, that's good.

I feel like everybody's always out to get me, and that's a weird feeling.

Music will always be my No. 1 passion, but I don't have to be doing it professionally. It's not really about that for me anymore. I feel like I don't have to look at it as a career. I can just rest in it and just be.

Well I think any designer that can understand what people need to be wearing right now is the biggest and best step that you can take. Instead of putting your ego first, you put the buyer first. And I think that that's a really important thing just to know what the consumer is wanting to wear.

My dad takes care of me as a manager and as a dad. That's his job, you know, to take care of me. He has my best interests at heart.

My family is my life, and I'll never lose that.

I can't deprive myself of things because then I obsess about it and end up eating.

I'm not that kind of publicity, attention-grabber type of artist.

I don't even have a type! I don't have a physical type. I have an emotional type.

When I signed a record deal, I was always told by execs I needed to be like everybody else, that I had to show my midriff, things that would take away from who I want to be as an artist.

There's tons of little tricks that that go into making the perfect shoe, but I think color, comfort is really important and different sizes of heels.

It's important for country fans to know that I'm not just trying to come in and take their money for a CD.

I'm very old fashioned.

I hate record labels. They think they know everything. I want to hear them try to sing it.

There are certain things that make me relax, like writing my journal. That's the only time that I'm relaxing. It's the only time I really get to examine myself.

I don't want to look like Daisy Duke every day. I don't want to wear a bathing suit every day.

I'm never going to be a woman who doesn't work.

Both of my grandmothers were diagnosed with breast cancer - one is a survivor and one passed away."

At school my boobs were bigger than all my friends' and I was afraid to show them. Now, I feel they make my outfits look better. They're like an accessory.

I'd like to tour with the Backstreet Boys because I love them so much.

Is that weird, taking my Louis Vuitton bag camping?

There is only one, believe it or not. I did get knocked up by a baller. A big football player.

I just started calling myself 'Swamp A-.' Like, I have swamp a- right now. I had major swamp a- because I was wearing these Spanx to hold in my gut ... It's like the bayou up in that region.

All I have to say is: Jessica Simpson is the most beautiful woman on the planet!

Giving up my scotch? My Macallan 18? That was hard for me! Though now that doesn't even sound good, being pregnant. You crave other things. A big thing of water sounds great!

I had a dream that she put her foot through my belly button and I was playing this little piggy went to the market just with her toes, just her foot was sticking out of my belly button and it was completely normal!

I'm such a blonde. It just doesn't make sense for me to have dark hair.

Is this chicken, what I have, or is this fish? I know it's tuna, but it says 'Chicken of the Sea.'

I'm big-busted... I can't always wear the cutest bras, and it makes me so mad.

I made sure no butt cheek hung out. You know, the original Daisy, Catherine Bach's shorts were shorter than mine.

I want to be a diva... like people-totally-respect-my-music diva, not diva like carry-my-diet-Coke-around.

I'm definitely ditzy and people believe that about me. But I mean, I'm not dumb.

Everybody is a dumb blonde at heart.

I respect knowledge of the psyche. I would be a therapist if I weren't an entertainer.

I've learned that sometimes love is not enough. You can have a soul mate and be madly in love with that person, but it's not necessarily enough. I think you have to have personalities that mesh well. You have to be the yin to their yang. You also have to be open to figuring things out together and communicating even when it's the last thing you want to do.

The average person expels flatulence 15 times each day!

I think that freshness and that innocence is something that is missing from a lot of female singers. I'm certainly not denying that I'm young, but I'm not fluff.

What if I accidentally hit somebody? Because my dad took one of his friends golfing, and it was, like, one of his first times and he knocked out a duck. Like, I'm scared that's going to happen.

Being a musician - it's easier for me to date an athlete. There's too much competition [with a musician]. There's too much know-it-all pop star.

Ah swear, ah will croak if she asks me for a pair of Nikes instead of Christian Louboutins!

I adore John Mayer. I don't see how anything that surrounds John could be negative.

First love is only once in a lifetime, and it remains only in memory.

Fried Oreos. What were we talking about before? That's pregnancy-brain for ya! Ha ha ha ha!

This week it's peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, toasted. And then, I'll put some salt on my hand like I'm taking a tequila shot and then take a bite of the sandwich.

A marriage doesn't have to be perfect, but you can be perfect for each other.

Platypus? I thought it was pronounced platymapus. Has it always been pronounced platypus?

People always say that pregnant women have a glow. And I say it's because you're sweating to death.

I'm probably going to deliver my baby in these [4-inch YSL heels] ... I went to the doctor yesterday and he said, 'You're gonna need to get out of those heels!'

I have a huge rib cage, which is why I can hold a note out until I'm blue in the face... because I have such a big lung capacity.

I was like, I want that one!

Well, for me, I grew up very Southern Baptist, and I definitely lived in my bubble. You know, I lived in my bubble that was in my church.

I really want to be just a singer-songwriter. That's who I am.

I think anything sounds good with a Southern accent.

The real me is a southern girl with her Levis on and an open heart. Wish I could save the world, like I was super girl.

Every tear should live its purpose. Don't ever wipe the reason away.

I'm definitely shy, so it was definitely acting for me to drop a trench coat and be in a bikini and try to get my cousins out of trouble by using my body. That was definitely acting.

People use music as a utensil to better themselves.

I collect lucky pennies that I find on the ground. I keep them in a Ziploc bag.

Weight Watchers is not intimidating. It's not a diet. It's a lifestyle.

I love that I can dream about paisley, and then two months later, someone's wearing it. I'm basically styling America.

I think Angelina Jolie has done amazing, amazing things, and the international adoption rate just since her has skyrocketed. It's unbelievable.

I think that having a public career is a bargain with the devil.

I would love for the time to come where somebody can talk about me and not have to talk about Britney and Christina in the same sentence.

When you grow up in the music industry, trying to be Britney Spears because that's what sells records and then you realize, 'All I have to do is be myself? I should have thought of that a long time ago,' it feels good to have success come from what's actually inside of you.

I can talk to my dad like he's my manager, and put 'Dad' on the back burner. We've been doing it since I was 13.

The point of launching a maternity line, for me, was to do something different.

I'm a naughty sweetheart.

It's not fair that women look in the mirror and feel disgust because of what society has made them believe.

I love to be comfortable, but I also love to play up the glamour.

The great thing about Dallas is there's no paparazzi.

Through a huge duration of my life, someone has always picked up after me. And when you're on your own and you're trying to be independent, it's definitely different.

I have a flirtatious personality.

I'm actually a good cook.

To be honest, bread constipates me, and I like to have my daily bowel movement.

I want to be as healthy as I can because I'm a mom now.

I always wonder if what I'm wearing will be something that people would compliment, or want to wear. I don't ever get ready just for myself, ever.

I'm very ditsy and a klutz. I've been known to walk on stage and fall over my dress.

At 16, every boyfriend I had I was going to marry.

I am not the type of person who believes everything she reads, but I like to look at photos and see what people are wearing.

As a woman who has some sort of power, you have to have a man that can take that. It's hard to find those men.

I'm a woman who wants her chocolate.

I used to be the kind of person who needed to have a lot of people around. That's where I found my serenity.

I feel like I have a bowling ball sitting on my hoo-ha.

I would never invite cameras into my life again.

The average pregnant woman farts 15 times that!

Twenty-three is old. It's almost 25, which is like almost mid-20s.

I get my inspiration from books, pictures, art. I might find a vintage scarf and say, "I think this should be our color palette."

It's not good to throw back scotch with a new fetus.

It's like carrying a bowling ball! Almost done.

Abstinence for me is about romance. It has nothing to do with my relationship with God. It's definitely a bonus in that department, but it's nothing spiritual. It's about giving something special to that person you're going to spend the rest of your life with.

For Thanksgiving we have to make a Tofurkey! It doesn't sound right! It's gonna be jiggly and weird.

I don't play sports. The only sports I play is shopping. But there is a lot of walking involved in that... running sometimes if there's a sale.

It was like a death in the family: You go through the mourning stage, then the rebellion, and then all of a sudden you have to find life by yourself. . . . I loved everything about marriage. I loved having a companion to wake up with and have barbecues with. But things happen and people grow apart. I don't really ever talk about the divorce because it was a heart-wrenching thing to go through.

I'm trying to create a relationship with myself. I feel good being married to myself right now!

I feel like I have a bowling ball sitting on my hoohah! Apparently I have a lot of amniotic fluid, so whenever my water breaks it will be like a fire hydrant!

We were going to have an all-day drinking binge. Gonna ride our bikes, hang out... do naughty things. But I started feeling this overwhelming guilt.

There is no perfect man! I think I'm meant to have many soulmates.

I'm really clumsy, so I trip and fall a lot. And every time I perform in New York my pants split onstage. That's happened four or five times. Every time, I pull on my mom's jeans as fast as I can, so there we are, standing backstage without our pants on. It's like a curse.

The crazy thing is, I never knew that a wiener could actually make me nauseous.

And I'm the worst liar of all time.

That's what I need from everybody right now - enjoy life with me.