Eamon Dunphy quotes:

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  • Niall Quinn is a creep. The man's an idiot, a Mother Theresa.

  • Usually it takes a bottle of Bacardi and a gallon of Coke to get John out of his seat.

  • Michel Platini has no bottle. He is not a great player.

  • Ability and guts is an unbeatable combination.

  • I'll have you know that I am not a failed Third Division footballer. I am a failed Second Division footballer.

  • Well, I don't like to make outlandish statements. Not all the time. But Wimbledon would have beaten them 10-0.

  • They just talk drivel. Whoever is winning is great, whoever isn't, isn't. It's banal. And also semi-literate at times ... they never criticise in an intelligent way. Anything that isn't banal is said to be an outburst. They've created this cartoon world where everyone talks like Lineker and says nothing.

  • We'll all see through Mourinho. We'll find out he's just a Bengal lancer.

  • You need dictatorships and poverty to produce great footballers.

  • Scots they're either nice or they're horrid and these two are horrid. The Scots wont like that Eamon, thats bordering on racism. Its not racism its ethnic criticism Bill.

  • Found out. A nothing player.

  • He's fat and a clown, Bill, a fat clown for all to see.

  • They get to the quarter-finals, Bill, I'll show up with a dress on

  • Every club he's been to has had great injury crises. Every club. And it's always hamstrings.

  • Ronaldo is a disgrace to the game. His petulance, temperament, throwing himself on the ground. It was a disgrace to professional football. This fella Ronaldo is a cod.

  • I've never managed anywhere, I've managed to stay alive for 63 and a half years baby.

  • Kilbane's head is better than his feet. If only he had three heads, one on the end of each leg.

  • If ever a player was out of his class that night it was me.

  • Somewhere in there the grace of a ballet dancer joins with the strength of an SAS squaddie, the dignity of an ancient kind, the nerve of a bomb disposal officer...

  • He's one of the biggest whingers in world football... he's a bloody eejit.

  • That's the first time I've seen sex between two men on the BBC.

  • That is NOT the arse of a £7million player!

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