Craig Bruce quotes:

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  • Why are people unemployed? Because there is no work. Why is there no work? Because people are not buying products and services. Why are people not buying products and services? Because they have no money. Why do people have no money? Because they are unemployed.

  • I wonder if those people shown protesting the deployment of nuclear weapons to western Europe during the Reagan era are feeling appropriately stupid today. 'Please don't take away our precious Soviet Union! - We demand the annihilation of all life on Earth!'

  • When shooting in the dark, it is a good idea to use a machine gun.

  • Think Tank, noun: The shower.

  • Fighting a war on terrorism is like fighting against crime. We can never hope to eradicate crime, so we shouldn't bother fighting it.

  • When trying to locate something, search your mind first.

  • If I gave a damn what other people think of me, I would be more like other people.

  • Whoever invented double clicking should be shot in the head! Twice!

  • It's hardware that makes a machine fast. It's software that makes a fast machine slow.

  • The entire universe is working against me. I can't believe the entire universe could be that foolish!

  • Temporary solutions often become permanent problems.

  • Something is always simple until you try it.

  • The only people I've ever heard saying that disagreeing with Bush, Cheney and Rumsfeld is un-American or treasonous are people who disagree with Bush, Cheney and Rumsfeld.

  • It's funny how social activists usually protest against the only things that have a credible chance of achieving the activists' goals.

  • Supermarket automatic doors open for me; therefore, I am.

  • It's easy to idealize someone that you don't know.

  • The Thought Police: To censor and protect.

  • Never underestimate the power of a simple tool.

  • When you talk to yourself, at least you know that someone is listening.

  • Yeah, computers are going to take over the programming business because they have become so fast recently that they can solve the Halting Problem in five seconds flat.

  • Organizations like the ACLU fought and won the good fight back in the 1960's, but it's clear that nowadays they've run out of useful things to do since they now spend most of their time defending the scum of the Earth from getting what they rightly deserve.

  • Programming' is a four-letter word.

  • The difference between being able to understand something and inventing it in the first place... is called genius.

  • The people who actually do things always suffer the slings and arrows of those who don't.

  • Time is a resource whose supply is inversely proportional to its demand.

  • Don't trust anyone who has been in school for the past 24 consecutive years.

  • It's funny how most activists are pacifists.

  • Don't judge a book by its thickness either.

  • Never question the relevance of truth, but always question the truth of relevance.

  • Nothing surpasses the beauty and elegance of a bad idea.

  • The only thing that is obscene is censorship.

  • Liberalism is financed by the dividends from Conservatism.

  • It's a bit odd that nobody seems to be using the correct technical term to describe organized Islamic terrorists. They are not a faction of a religion or a social movement. They are a cult. A suicide cult.

  • 'Programming' is a four-letter word.

  • Geez, all that money we waste on space exploration; just think how many bombs that would buy!

  • You usually have to wait for that which is worth waiting for.

  • If the shoe fits, it is probably worn out.

  • Things always look better when you haven't seen them.

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