Brian South quotes:

When asked what profession they like least, most people will give the obvious answer: clowns.

Brunch is such an odd thing. It was created by fat, lazy people who were too lazy to wake up at a reasonable hour and too fat to wait until the next proper time for dining.

The toughest part about riding a horse is overcoming the urge to eat it.

Sometimes the thing one wants most is the very thing that will get him killed with an axe.

Really the only time men and women get along is when women want sex.

This is why it is important never to pick or smell flowers, and to always wear headgear when admiring them.

Nothing says you care like sending someone a kitten.