Boris Johnson quotes:

+1
Share
Pin
Like
Send
Share
  • My speaking style was criticised by no less an authority than Arnold Schwarzenegger. It was a low moment, my friends, to have my rhetorical skills denounced by a monosyllabic Austrian cyborg.

  • When Cameron's Conservatives come to power it will be a golden age for cyclists and an Elysium of cycle lanes, bike racks, and sharia law for bike thieves. And I hope that cycling in London will become almost Chinese in its ubiquity.

  • I have as much chance of becoming Prime Minister as of being decapitated by a frisbee or of finding Elvis.

  • My chances of being PM are about as good as the chances of finding Elvis on Mars, or my being reincarnated as an olive.

  • I dont see why people are so snooty about Channel Five. It has some respectable documentaries about the Second World War. It also devotes considerable airtime to investigations into lap-dancing, and other related and vital subjects

  • Voting Tory will cause your wife to have bigger breasts and increase your chances of owning a BMW M3.

  • There is absolutely no one, apart from yourself, who can prevent you, in the middle of the night, from sneaking down to tidy up the edges of that hunk of cheese at the back of the fridge.

  • I have come to the conclusion that Tony Blair has finally gone mad ... he made assertions that are so jaw-droppingly and breathtakingly at variance with reality that he surely needs professional psychiatric help.

  • The Lib Dems are not just empty. They are a void within a vacuum surrounded by a vast inanition.

  • So I'm definitely in favour of stimulating the dynamic wealth creation sectors of the economy.

  • It is just flipping unbelievable. He is a mixture of Harry Houdini and a greased piglet. He is barely human in his elusiveness. Nailing Blair is like trying to pin jelly to a wall.

  • I am supporting David Cameron purely out of cynical self-interest.

  • The job of mayor of London is unbelievably taxing, particularly in the run-up to the Olympics.

  • I'd like thousands of schools as good as the one I went to, Eton.

  • London is the sporting capital of the world. I say to the Chinese and I say to the world, ping pong is coming home.

  • It is possible to have a pretty good life and career being a leech and a parasite in the media world, gadding about from TV studio to TV studio, writing inconsequential pieces and having a good time.

  • My friends, as I have discovered myself, there are no disasters, only opportunities. And, indeed, opportunities for fresh disasters.

  • Ping-pong was invented on the dining tables of England in the 19th century, and it was called Wiff-waff! And there, I think, you have the difference between us and the rest of the world. Other nations, the French, looked at a dining table and saw an opportunity to have dinner; we looked at it an saw an opportunity to play Wiff-waff.

  • What I worry about is that people are losing confidence, losing energy, losing enthusiasm, and there's a real opportunity to get them into work.

  • We are experiencing such large support for the Olympic relay that our advice is to stay in your neighbourhood, stay in your borough and wait for it to come near you.

  • I'm a one-nation Tory.

  • Nothing excites compassion, in friend and foe alike, as much as the sight of you ker-splonked on the Tarmac with your propeller buried six feet under.

  • We need to look at our nannying, mollycoddled, politically correct culture in my view, which stops kids from going out and playing competitive sport. I also think we need to look at the shear fatness of the regulations which control people who want to help kids play sport.

  • I think I was once given cocaine but I sneezed so it didn't go up my nose. In fact, it may have been icing sugar.

  • I want you to know that I have nothing against Orlando, though you are, of course, far more likely to get shot or robbed there than in London.

  • He is like some sherry-crazed old dowager who has lost the family silver at roulette, and who now decides to double up by betting the house as well.

  • I have not been more robust towards female rather than male assembly members and I do not believe I have been remotely sexist.

  • I love swimming in rivers, and well remember once jumping in at Chiswick.

  • I love tennis with a passion. I challenged Boris Becker to a match once and he said he was up for it but he never called back. I bet I could make him run around.

  • I am hoping very much to get re-elected but it is going to be a tough fight.

  • London is a fantastic creator of jobs - but many of these jobs are going to people who don't originate in this country.

  • I lead a life of blameless domesticity and always have done.

  • I promised to run the most open and transparent administration in Britain. That is why, with this brutally honest and unprecedented progress report, I am determined to level with Londoners.

  • My policy on cake is pro having it and pro eating it.

  • Never in my life did I think I would be congratulated by Mick Jagger for achieving anything.

  • Times have been tough, the economy has been tough. But I want to bring forward a fantastic manifesto for taking the city forwards.

  • If we judged everybody by the stupid, unguarded things they blurt out to their nearest and dearest, then we wouldn't ever get anywhere.

  • Some people play the piano, some do Sudoku, some watch television, some people go out to dinner parties. I write books.

  • But if people want to swim in the Thames, if they want to take their lives into their own hands, then they should be able to do so with all the freedom and exhilaration of our woad-painted ancestors.

  • It is easy to make promises - it is hard work to keep them.

  • The only reason I wouldn't go to some parts of New York is the real risk of meeting Donald Trump.

  • If gay marriage was OK ... then I saw no reason in principle why a union should not be consecrated between three men, as well as two men; or indeed three men and a dog.

  • It is said that the Queen has come to love the Commonwealth, partly because it supplies her with regular cheering crowds of flag-waving picaninnies; and one can imagine that Blair, twice victor abroad but enmired at home, is similarly seduced by foreign politeness. They say he is shortly off to the Congo. No doubt the AK47s will fall silent, and the pangas will stop their hacking of human flesh, and the tribal warriors will all break out in Watermelon smiles to see the big white chief touch down in his big white British taxpayer-funded bird.

  • My ideal world is, we're there, we're in the EU, trying to make it better.

  • In 1904, 20 per cent of journeys were made by bicycle in London. I want to see a figure like that again. If you can't turn the clock back to 1904, what's the point of being a Conservative?

  • Remind me: who was the greater mass murderer, Stalin or Hitler? Well, Stalin is thought to have been responsible for about 50 million deaths, and Hitler for a mere 25 million. What Hitler did in his concentration camps was equalled if not exceeded in foulness by the Soviet gulags, forced starvation and pogroms. What makes the achievements of communist Russia so special and different, that you can simper around in a CCCP T-shirt, while anyone demented enough to wear anything commemorating the Third Reich would be speedily banged away under the 1986 Public Order Act?

  • The dreadful truth is that when people come to see their MP they have run out of better ideas.

  • The meat in the sausage has got to be Conservative.

  • It was the kind of blind, gulping, insensate greed that you associate with some milk-eyed creature in a volcanic fissure at the bottom of the Marianas Trench-an organism with no understanding of the existence, let alone the feelings, of other members of the ecosystem.

  • Volunteering is also now more crucial than ever in helping people find work.

  • I firmly believe that volunteering is good for our society and brings communities together. It's a fantastic opportunity to get involved in your local community, to meet new people and to gain a sense of pride and achievement.

  • I think it's absolutely amazing and how the Remain side have the cheek to come and tell us that we improve our security by staying in this organisation I do not understand.

  • It hasn't taken them long, they began by telling us they would have a positive and patriotic case and they're back to project fear within minutes. There they go again they have nothing positive to say.

  • All the people I talk to, increasingly, can see that the emperor has got no clothes. The case for leaving [the EU] is now overwhelming.

  • I'm afraid Sadiq Khan is completely wrong. The European Court of Justice is the supreme legal authority in our country.

  • Since January 1993 there have been 27 other countries not in the EU that have done better than the UK at exporting goods into the single market.

  • [People] are woefully underestimating this country and what it can achieve.

  • You are part of our Great British family.

  • Our friends in America will be at the front of the queue for trade deals.

  • The next Tory leader would have to unify his party and ensure that Britain stood tall in the world.

  • The volunteering spirit of Londoners is part of what makes this the best big city on earth.

  • We celebrate the contribution of people who have come to this country to make it better.

  • We did everything we could to break down barriers that restrain poorest.

  • When my father began his work in the 1970s it was a very different EU. I pay tribute to what he did. But it has now become a very different proposition: the United States of Europe.

  • I want to offer particular congratulations to Andrea Leadsom on her stunning achievement. She is now well placed to win and replace the absurd gloom in some quarters with a positive, confident and optimistic approach, not just to Europe, but to government all round.

  • We should celebrate immigrants and everything they do for our country.

  • Do you seriously propose that they are going to be so insane as to allow tariffs to be imposed. The EU is, I'm afraid a job destroying engine. You can see it all across southern Europe, you can see it, alas, in our country.

  • The crucial thing is to look in an informed way at what's going on. Look at the way in which we are forced by our imbalanced system to push away people who might contribute mightily to the NHS.

  • I'm no communist.I'm a tax cutting Conservative. But I want a capitalism that is fairer to forgotten people.

  • This is our chance to build a Britain where everyone benefits from the success of the economy.

  • Some people think that it [Brexit] is the end of the world. It's not. On the contrary, it's a massive opportunity for this country.

  • This is not a time to quail, it is not a crisis, nor should we see it as an excuse for self-doubt. It is a moment of hope.

  • Andrea Leadsom, I think, has all the qualities that you need at the moment. She's got a lot of zap, a lot of drive, and all the experience. Plus I think she can articulate what's needed at the moment, which is a bit of an antidote to some of the gloom and negativity and misunderstanding about what the Brexit vote means.

  • I would ban sweets from school - but this pressure to bring in healthy food is too much

  • I think it is going to be wonderful. I went to the Paralympics in Beijing and have seen how brilliant the sport is at first hand. People are going to love it. It is going to change people's attitudes to Paralympians and it is going to be a great show.

  • Can I say anything good about Ken Livinstone? A long time ago he did some good things, but I can't now remember what any of them were.

  • We need to remember that we can't compete endlessly with other nations that set their income taxes substantially lower than ours. They will attract jobs, and investment. They may generate more tax - and they may even persuade their tennis champs to run that extra half yard

  • As a Scot Gordon Brown will find it hard to convince people in England he should be prime minister

  • My point is that this Potter business has legs. It will run and run, and we must be utterly mad, as a country, to leave it to the Americans to make money from a great British invention. I appeal to the children of this country and to their Potter-fiend parents to write to Warner Bros and Universal, and perhaps, even, to the great J K herself. Bring Harry home to Britain-and if you want a site with less rainfall than Rome, with excellent public transport, and strong connections to Harry Potter, I have just the place.

  • Try as I might, I could not look at an overhead projection of a growth profit matrix and stay conscious.

  • This is a super masticated subject, and it is time to spit it out.

  • The mayors fund for London will be a streamlined vehicle for getting money from the wealth creating sector to communities across London that are facing hardship and deprivation and are the victims of crime.

  • The Geiger-counter of Olympomania is going to go zoink off the scale,

  • It just happens I write fast and always have done.

  • Life isn't like coursework, baby. It's one damn essay crisis after another.

  • I want London to be a competitive, dynamic place to come to work.

  • I want to win and I want to be in office.

  • Dark forces dragged me away from the keyboard, swirling forces of irresistible intensity and power.

  • I cant remember what my line on drugs is. Whats my line on drugs?

  • Yes, cannabis is dangerous, but no more than other perfectly legal drugs. It's time for a rethink, and the Tory party - the funkiest, most jiving party on Earth - is where it's happening.

  • I think the risks that people see of terrorism are incredibly important but we are very confident we have got the right people on it and the risks have been minimised.

  • Humanity would have plunged into a new dark age of absolutely frightening and appalling characteristics without Churchill.

+1
Share
Pin
Like
Send
Share