Bobby Heenan quotes:

Are there any swamps in Oklahoma? Yes, there is. It's called Tulsa.

[On Sting] He threw a sucker punch. There's the sucker who threw the punch. Him the the Bart Simpson hair doo.

North Dakota State. What do you have to do there to graduate? Milk a cow with your left hand?

Its a dog eat dog world, and Mr. Perfect is a Milk Bone.

Dusty Rhodes and Sapphire. They're a lovely twosome, or threesome, or foursome, or twenty-fifthsome.

It's a dog eat dog world, and Mr. Perfect is a Milk Bone.

The money's the same, whether you earn it or scam it.

Obviously some cheap motel is missing a shower curtain.

Tito Santana is like a cue-ball. The more you strike him, the more english you get out of him.

Hawaii's the 50th state? I thought it was a suburb of Guam.

There's only two kinds of music I don't like... Country and Western.

I know all about cheating. I've had six very successful marriages.

He's the only man I know of who can hide his own easter eggs.

You know they say money can't buy happiness. Give me 50 bucks and watch me smile

There's the downtown area of Tupelo. Did you see the skyscrapers? Two stories.

I asked Stu Hart earlier. I said, 'Stu, you gotta be proud of your boys.' He said, 'I have boys?'

I don't look at myself as a hero or smart person. I have a seventh-grade education, but I've had a lot of fun.

There's nothing better than a good, blind referee.

A friend in need is a pest.

I'd love to be popular in Barcelona. That sounds like a fun job

He looks like something that fell out of a deck of cards!

If you're poor and you do something stupid, you're nuts. If you're rich and do something stupid, you're eccentric.

I'm a legend in this sport. If you don't believe me, ask me

This guy makes coffee nervous.

The bad thing about the Bushwhackers is that win, lose, or draw, you gotta have everything you got on fumigated.

He's not pointing to anybody, he's showing off how high he can count!

Everyone should have cancer one time - then you'd know that other things aren't important. The guy that gives you the finger at the stoplight don't mean nothing anymore. You come home and something's cold, or you didn't get something in the mail. Big deal. You want to get up every day and see your family and your friends.

When's the last time you went into a barber shop and saw everyone there unconsious?

I think women's wrestling has had a hard time because of GLOW. When GLOW came out, it looked like somebody was ripping off the male industry. Everybody made fun of it. WOW is a great product. It's produced right. It's got a little story line, and it's got good-looking girls who can work and can talk.

I would like to do commercials, or even work for WWE if they called me. I wouldn't want to go back on the air or manage again, but I would like to be a spokesperson and do stuff like that.

I'm a legend in this sport. If you don't believe me, ask me.

I'd love to be popular in Barcelona. That sounds like a fun job.

You win some and you lose some. Unless you're Virgil, then you lose them all.

The two things that scare me most about wrestling fans is that they're allowed to vote and allowed to reproduce.

Koko B. Ware â?¦ his momâ??s first name was Tupper.

There's a counter for every hold and a hold for every counter, and a lunch counter for every person that you know Schivone.

To Jim Duggan, taking a shower is a high risk maneuver.

I once asked him what came at the end of the sentence... and he said "parole".

Janetty tried to dive through the window to escape, what an act of cowardice.

By the time The Iron Sheik gets to the ring, it will be Wrestlemania 37!

It's very hard to get out of this hold, that's why you either have to scoot backwards, move forwards, or try to get up.

They're living proof that the 3 stooges had children.

Have you ever been to Glens Falls? The city limits signs are on the same post.

And for those of you that dropped out of high school, remember the famous phrase: 'Do you want fries with that?'

Remember folks, fish are like relatives. After two days, they stink.

Stu Hart trained all his kids--only three of them use the litter box.

When The Phenoix Suns are missing two basketballs, they'll know where to look!

I heard a rumor that your mom and dad ran away from home.

What are you doing, looking at me with one eye and chasing a fly with the other?

Once you wrestke Rikki Atakki, an hour later you want to wrestle him again.

If you ever had your moon salted you'd know how painful that could be.

There's only two kinds of music I don't like....Country and Western.

Just look at the way he hangs in mid air!

You'd have a good voice, if it ever came out of your throat

You don't have to yell at me Schiavone. I'm not blind!

Oh, I knew he was gonna do that. I just knew he was gonna do that. He don't need Jannetty. I told you that off and on.

You can win, it'll just cost you some money.

This (Paris,France) wouldn't be a bad place, but it's full of Frenchmen.

Its amazing that Lou Ferrigno can talk with fifty pounds of cracker in his mouth.

You're 83? Really? You don't look it. I would've guessed 81 or 82.