Ashton Quotes in Simon Sez (1999)

Ashton: Remove them! It's a bridge, for god's sake; not a petting zoo!

Ashton: Now, feel free to jump in if I get any of this wrong, but you haven't got the disc, and you haven't got the girl...

[Silence]

Ashton: ... Pity. I was so hoping you'd jump in.

Ashton: Guess what we're going to blow up first!

Simon: Your ego?

Ashton: No, but nice try, sailor! The Eiffel Tower!

Simon: Why?

Ashton: Because it's big and it's beautiful and I'm tired of looking at it!

Ashton: Stupid bee! You're just a fly with a stinger on your arse!

Ashton: Monsters! Are you alright? Did they get you?

Skylar: No! My life just flashed before my eyes all in thanks to a family of raccoons. I'm really dead now... decaying before your eyes. Wanna see?

Ashton: Really? Does it hurt?

Skylar: Only the first time!

Ashton: Oh, well that's good!

Jonathan: So, Ash - you still pissing the bed at night?

Ashton: You know I stopped that! A year... three years ago! No, two years ago!

Jonathan: Well don't - watersports can be hot!

Ashton: Oh come on, live a little. Let's do it. Yep - the magic gummy bears want to play!

Skylar: And, do what? Summon some hot buff demon who will screw your brains out then rip your throat open? No, thank you! Put that thing back where you found it!

Vlad: My dad used to tell us these woods were haunted by a girl... Malice Valeria.

Ashton: Oh - I think I knew a girl who had that!

Vlad: It was her name dumbass, not a disease!

Ashton: I've been trying to call you! Haven't had any reception though. I think it's the rabbits or something - they're scandalous, you know?

Ashton: So this is it - the cabin... our torture chamber!