Ariel Truax Quotes in Grumpy Old Men (1993)

Ariel Truax: John, when was the last time you made love?

John Gustafson: October 4th... 1978.

Ariel Truax: Oh, I think we're safe.

Ariel Truax: [John is showing Ariel some family pictures] And these two little guys?

John Gustafson: Oh! That's me and the moron.

Ariel Truax: Is that Max?

John Gustafson: Of course it's Max. He's ugly isn't he?

Ariel Truax: Aw, you mean you were friends?

John Gustafson: I was 10, and didn't know any better.

Ariel Truax: What makes two men spend most of their lives fighting?

John Gustafson: Oh? Guess.

Ariel Truax: A woman!

[John nods]

Ariel Truax: How romantic.

John Gustafson: No, it wasn't romantic at all.

John Gustafson: Ohh you don't know a damn things about me...

Ariel Truax: I do too! And I also know the only thing in life, that you regret, are the risks that you don't take.

Ariel Truax: Gay or straight?

John Gustafson: Huh?

Ariel Truax: Heterosexual or homosexual?

John Gustafson: Geez Louise!

Ariel Truax: Well, it's a perfectly legitimate question.

John Gustafson: Well, maybe in California, but here in Minnesota... Who-ho-ho-ho!