Alvin Quotes in Bait (2000)


Alvin Quotes:

  • Julio: [Slamming Alvin against Ramundo's car] Your brother fucked us!

    Ramundo: What the fuck are you doing? This is my fucking car man! This is my baby.

    Julio: Sorry.

    [Slamming Alvin against the wall]

    Julio: Your brother fucked us!

    Ramundo: So, Stevie's fucking my girl right?

    Alvin: Well I think that's a point you're going to have to take with Stevie.

    Julio: Well maybe Stevie isn't around to make a...point with anyone.

    Ramundo: What the fuck are you saying?

    Julio: I'm saying that Stevie didn't show.

    Ramundo: Well just say it! Stop being so fucking complex!

    Julio: I'm not complex, you're complex!

    Alvin: Listen guys, do I have to be around for this?

    JulioRamundo: Shut up!

  • Alvin: So I'm bouncing from toy to toy like I'm some sort of drunk dude. Mom's smiling. My father's smiling. It's all good, right? Then around 8:30, cops show up. Take the toys, take my father. But for about two and a half hours I had a very, very happy childhood.

  • Alvin: When you get your money, I think you need to get an anger management class.

  • Alvin: [tied up] Let me get this straight: the offer is a million dollars, or you kill me.

    Bristol: Correct.

    Alvin: You know, a million dollars ain't what it used to be, with taxes...

  • [last lines]

    Alvin: Let me ask you something. Do you like baseball?

  • [from trailer]

    Alvin: [in the middle of the road] You drive like my grandmother! Whoooo-hoooo! This is awesome!

  • Alvin: Don't you judge me, Jon Waters, I've seen Pink flamingos

  • [from trailer]

    Alvin: When I say "party", you say "Alvin". Party!

    Party People: Alvin!

    Alvin: Party!

    Party People: Alvin!

    Alvin: Party!

    Dave: [unplugs the plug of the dance floor] ALVIIIIIIN!

    Party Guy: You said that in a non-party way, man.

    Alvin: Woah, buzzkill.

  • Alvin: Simon!

    Brittany: Uh... Alvin? You're starting to sound like Dave.

    Alvin: [gasps] Nooooooooooo!

  • Alvin: I think I know why Dave hasn't come.

    Brittany: You do? Why?

    Alvin: 'Cause he's not even looking.

    Brittany: Alvin, why wouldn't he be looking for us?

    Alvin: Because I drive him crazy. you know the way Simon's been driving me crazy? I mean, that's what I've been doing to Dave for years. No wonder he hates me.


    Brittany: Oh, don't worry, Alvin. I'm sure Dave will come. I mean, he certainly loves Simon and Theodore.

  • Alvin: We're alive! We're alive!

    Brittany: Good, 'cause now I'm going to kill you!

  • Zoe: [Simon and Theodore are bungee jumping] We're having the best time. Why did you have to show up and be so uptight?

    Alvin: Me, uptight? I'm not the uptight one. I'm the fun one. The cool one. Ask anyone!

    Zoe: Who should I ask?

  • Brittany: Since I'm not the pretty one anymore, maybe I should build a shelter too.

    Alvin: Yeah, good luck with that.

    Brittany: You think I can't do it?

    Alvin: Hey, I didn't say that, Brit. I thought it, but I didn't say it.

  • Alvin: Guys, we're chipmunks! We're used to living in the wild!

    Brittany: Uh, no. We're chipmunks that used to be used to living in the wild!

  • Alvin: You can follow me on Critter.

  • Alvin: [as James Bond] I like my tail shaken, not stirred.

  • Alvin: Oh, my acorns!

  • Theodore: Guys, I wanna go home.

    Simon: What do you mean? You are home.

    Theodore: No. I mean home home, with Dave.

    Alvin: But Theodore, wake up and smell the toffee. Dave doesn't even want us. He doesn't even care to come to our show.

  • David Seville: Chipmunks can't talk either.

    Simon: Well, our lips are moving and words are coming out.

    David Seville: This is not happening. I'm not talking to chipmunks, I'm not talking to chipmunks.

    Alvin: So, how's that going for you, Dave?

    David Seville: Uhh - uhh, how'd you know my name?

    Alvin: Oh, that one? We read your mail by accident.

    Simon: You really oughta pay that utility bill, Dave. Ever heard of a credit rating?

    Theodore: [turns on the food processor] What's this thing?

    David Seville: Hey, hey... hey, hey, turn that off!

    Alvin: [turns off the food processor] Sorry.

    Simon: [rubs Theodore's head] He fell out of the tree at birth.

    David Seville: C-Can all animals talk?

    Simon: Well, fish do have this type of sign language.

    Alvin: Hey Dave, do all humans have houses that smell like sweatsocks?

    Alvin: [singing while squirting soap out of the soap dispenser] Dave likes to wear, dirty underwear, with little hairs...

    Simon: We're getting off on the wrong foot. Allow us to introduce ourselves. Hello, I'm Simon, the smart one. He's Alvin...

    Alvin: The awesomest one...

    Theodore: And I'm Theodore.

    David Seville: Oh, that's nice to meet you. Now get out of my house.

    Theodore: But... we talk.

    David Seville: Which only makes me want you out of my house that much more. It's creepy, unnatural, somewhat evil.

    Alvin: I kind of liked him better when he was unconscious.

    David Seville: [places a mixing bowl over the chipmunks] Gotcha!

    Alvin: Hey!

    David Seville: Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!

  • Alvin: Last one to the door is road kill!

    Simon: I'm in!

    [Alvin and Simon make a break for the door]

    Theodore: [distracted by a Christmas ornament] Hmm... What are these shiny things?

    Simon: [goes back to Theodore] Theodore, we're leaving now!

  • David Seville: [picks up a stack of toster waffles from the under the kitchen rug]

    Simon: We put a few toaster waffles aside for winter

    Alvin: And we're not sharing!

    David Seville: Guys, we're gonna have food all winter so if you start storing it, it's gonna get gross and we're gonna have rodent -...

    SimonTheodoreAlvin: [looks at Dave]

    David Seville: Bad you know... non-talking rodents around here

  • Alvin: [singing] Don't cha... Yeah, yeah, come on, come on... Don't cha wish your girlfriend was hot like me / Don't cha wish your girlfriend was a freak like me...

    [Dave opens the dishwasher door and Alvin screams]

    Alvin: There's this new thing, it's called knocking!

    David Seville: Get out!

    Alvin: I'm waiting for the rain cycle.

    David Seville: [pulls Alvin out of the dishwasher] Out!

    Alvin: Hey, I'm taking a shower here!

    David Seville: You know, if I made a list of my worst days ever, guess what? Today would be at the top of the list.

    Alvin: And it's still early.

    David Seville: Clam it, sudsy!

    [Simon and Theodore join Alvin on the counter]

    Alvin: Look, let me just put it to you like this, OK? I have no job, no career, my house is always a mess, thank you very much...

  • [up a lighting post, being chased by a security guard]

    Alvin: [songsung] Eeny, meeny, miny, mo, missed a chipmunk cause you're slow.

    [shines the spotlight in his eyes]

    Alvin: Yippee-kie-yay, mamacita!

  • David Seville: Alright, here's the deal; you guys sing my songs, you get to sleep here.

    Alvin: [thinks about it] No. Wait! Is breakfast included?

    David Seville: [thinks about it] I can live with that.

    Simon: What about TV privileges?

    David Seville: [thinks about it] Okay, but not after seven.

    Theodore: Eight.

    David Seville: Done. Don't tell you're animal friends, cause I don't wanna come home and find a bunch of rabbits and skunks on my couch.

    Simon: Filthy creatures, Dave. Never associate with them.

    Theodore: Yeah, you're our only friend.

    David Seville: No, no, no, no, let's not get ahead of ourselves here. Let's just start with me being your songwriter.

    Alvin: Um, let me ask you, have you ever written a song before?

    David Seville: Yup.

    Alvin: And... is that your music stuff outside?

    David Seville: Yup.

    [thunder claps reminding Dave that his songwriting equipment is soaked in the rain]

    David Seville: Oh no!

    Alvin: Hurry back.

  • [first lines]

    Alvin (singing voice)Simon (singing voice)Theodore (singing voice): [a capella] Where is the moment we needed the most/You kick up the leaves and the magic is lost/They tell me your blue skies fade to gray/They tell me your passion's gone away/And I don't need no carryin' on/Cause you had a bad day/You're taking one down/You sing a sad song just to turn it around/You say you don't know/You tell me don't lie/You work at a smile and you go for a ride/You had a bad day/You've seen what you like/And how does it feel for one more time/You had a bad day/You had a bad day/

    Alvin: [pushing the last of the acorns into the tree] It's going, It's going.

    [gets sucked in and falls out with all of the acorns]

    Simon: And it's gone.

    Alvin: [from inside the tree] Whatever!

    Theodore: Maybe we should take a break.

    [an acorn hits him on the head]

    Theodore: Ouch!

    Alvin: That's it! I can't take this anymore! I can't! I give up! I'm sick of struggling for survival! Competing with gophers and earthworms, and that loser sparrow who always takes my nuts! And I'm especially sick of this stupid, stupid...*tree!*

    [the sound of a buzzsaw is heard, and the tree shakes]

    Simon: Whoa! What's happening?

    Theodore: Guys! I think he made it angry!

  • [last lines]

    Alvin: [tries to open a bottle of champange] Stupid cork! Doesn't - Whoa!

    [Cork flies into a glass door cabinet breaking it along with some of the glasses in it]

    Alvin: Yikes, Ha-ha! Oops!

    David Seville: Not gonna say it.

    Alvin: Uh-oh!

    Simon: Good grief.

    [Champagne spills all over the floor creating a large puddle]

    Claire: Are you still not gonna say it?

    David Seville: [tries very hard not to] Nope!

    [Champagne puddle becomes a flood that hits a plug outlet, causing a blackout in Dave's house]

    David Seville: I'm gonna say it. AAAAAALLLLLLVVVVVVIIIIIINNNNNN!

    Alvin: OKAY!

  • Simon: [after knocking out Dave] Hmm. He's been out for quite a while.

    Theodore: [gasps] You guys, he's dead!

    Alvin: Don't panic! Wipe everything down! I'll need three garbage bags, a shovel, some disinfectant, some latex gloves, and oregano. Go!

    Simon: Hang on, Sherlock. He's coming too.

    David Seville: I must be hearing things.

    [regains consciousness]

    David Seville: Oh, this is trippy.

    Theodore: Sir, are you alright?

  • Theodore: [munching on some cereal] This is the greatest day of my life!

    Alvin: Eureka! I found the cheese balls!

    [Alvin pours out the cheese balls and Simon catches them with a bowl]

    Simon: Ughh! Alvin, what are you doing? Don't make a mess!

    Alvin: Cannonball!

    [jumps into the bowl of cheese balls]

  • Alvin: [knocks on door] You should've kissed her, Dave. She really wanted you!

    Simon: Alvin, you're not helping.

    Alvin: Aw, don't give up, Dave.

    David Seville: Go away! Leave me alone!

    Theodore: Dave, would you like a cookie?

    David Seville: I said leave me alone!

  • Theodore: How do you think it's going?

    Alvin: Terrible! They're not even sniffing each other!

    Simon: But Alvin, Dave said that...

    Alvin: Dave needs a little help from the love doctor.

    Theodore: And his assistant.

    Simon: [pulls Theodore inside the room] Get back here.

  • David Seville: They're savings bonds. In seven years you will get to buy something really nice.

    Alvin: Do you have any that you bought seven years ago?

  • [after being captured and placed into a cat carrier]

    Alvin: You'll never take us alive!

    Simon: They just did take us alive, Alvin.

    Alvin: It's a figure of speech, Simon. Instead of criticizing me, why not use your big brain to think of a way out?

  • David Seville: What was that?

    Simon: Um, nothing, nothing, just a little stage fright.

    Theodore: I thought my heart was gonna explode.

    Alvin: We're not performing monkeys, Dave. Why do we have to sing for that guy anyway?

    David Seville: Well, how's this? Pretend I need the money and I hate my job and you're staying at my place so, you owe me.

    Theodore: We're sorry, Dave.

    David Seville: Yeah, that helps.

    David Seville: [heavy sigh] Never mind, I'm late for work.

    Theodore: Ooh, ooh, can we go with you?

    David Seville: What, so you can mess that up too? Uh-uh. You're going home.

    Alvin: Can I stand on your lap and steer?

    Theodore: Oh, can I at least beep the... horn?

    [Dave looks at the chipmunks]

    Theodore: Never mind.

  • Theodore: Who's Claire?

    Simon: Claire is Dave's mate. Ooh-la-la.

    David Seville: She's not my mate. She's my ex-mate.

    David Seville: [frantically tries to clean the house] This is great.

    Simon: Dave, slow down. You just go get the food. We'll take care of the rest, all right?

    David Seville: Oh, why am I having a hard time believing you?

    Alvin: That hurts, Dave. That really hurts.

    Simon: Yeah, we're all in this together, Dave.

    Theodore: Like a family.

    David Seville: No, not like a family!

    Alvin: Tick-tock, Dave. Better bust-a-move!

    David Seville: Right.

    [Theodore giggles and Dave points at him]

  • Alvin: Is it me, or was he a little mad?

    Simon: Hmm... I wonder... is Dave mad? Yes!

    Theodore: He really did have garlic breath.

    Simon: Yeah, well played, guys.

    Alvin: Idea, ding-ding-ding-ding! Who has cab fare?

    Simon: Cab fare? We don't even have pockets.

  • David Seville: Okay, new rule. No going out after nine, and not at all unless I know where you're going.

    Theodore: Were you worried about us, Dave?

    David Seville: No, I just needed to know, that's all.

    Alvin: Um, if you're not worried, then why do you need to know?

    David Seville: I need to know, okay?

  • Alvin (singing voice)Simon (singing voice)Theodore (singing voice): [a capella] Only you can make this world seem right / Only you can make the darkness bright

    [Dave opens window]

    Alvin: Uh, were we disturbing you?

    David Seville: Y-you guys can sing too?

    Alvin: That's not singing, this is singing.

    Alvin (singing voice)Simon (singing voice)Theodore (singing voice): [sing Funkytown]

    David Seville: This is amazing. Here, everyone inside.

    [the three chipmunks jump onto the trash can one by one]

    Simon: [almost slips] Whoopsie.

    [Dave helps Simon up]

    Simon: Thank you.

  • Alvin: [running on a tape recorder spool] This kicks a hamster wheel's butt!

  • Alvin: [Theodore crashed a RC car] Why didn't the airbags deploy?

    Simon: Theodore, don't go into the light!

    Theodore: Huh? Phew! Let's do it again!

  • David Seville: It's hard, I know, three months ago you were wandering around in a tree somewhere and, now you're...

    Alvin: [sucks air from a balloon and speaks in a low voice] major rockstars!

    David Seville: Okay, whatever. Well, my point is, just because you're...

    Alvin: [low voice] major rockstars!

    David Seville: [releases balloon from Alvin's hand and sits down again] ... doesn't mean that you can have or do whatever you want!

    Simon: Well, Uncle Ian said that we should always be happy.

    David Seville: Okay, you know what? He's not your uncle!

    [pulls the balloons down from the ceiling fan]

    Alvin: He also, David, said that we should be making 20 dollars a day.

    David Seville: Well, guess what? You're making way more than that. And because I care, I'm putting it all away for you, just like storing nuts for the winter.

    Alvin: Ah, winter's for losers!

    Simon: Yeah. And shouldn't we be having our say on how to build our investment portfolio?

    David Seville: Where is all this coming from? You guys are just kids.

    Alvin: Kids, Dave... or rats?

    David Seville: What?

    Theodore: Well, Uncle Ian said that we're like his family.

    David Seville: Oh yeah? Well, if you love Uncle Ian so much and don't think I'm watching out for you, why don't you go live with Uncle Ian?

  • Alvin: Come on, Alvin! Remember your 5 D's: dodge, duck, dip, dive, and dodge!

  • Alvin: Oh it is on like Donkey Kong!

  • Alvin: Si, don't make me have to kiss you because I'll do it! I don't care! Here come the lips! Makeout train is leaving the station! Toot toot!

  • Alvin: Whoops! Well, it looks like it's time to play my second favorite game: hide the broken TV from Dave. You wanna play?

  • Alvin: Who's Aunt Jackie?

    Theodore: The one who sends us those metal buckets of yummy popcorn for Christmas.

    Alvin: Oh, Popcorn Jackie.

  • Toby: What was school like for me? Uh, in a word: awesome. But, you know, that's 'cause I was like extremely popular.

    Simon: Is that why you still live with your grandma?

    Alvin: And refer to yourself as "The Tobester?"

    Theodore: And go

    [imitating video game]

    Theodore: pyu pyu pyu all day?

  • Alvin: Dave, just think how much you'd miss us if there were six of us.

    Dave: Alvin, what did you say?

    Alvin: Well, the chipettes needed a place to crash, right? So I said that you said they could stay with us as long as they needed to.

    Dave: Alvin...

    Alvin: Okay!

  • Dave: Alvin, you need to share the spotlight. It's not all about you.

    Alvin: Sorry, Dave. I can't hear you over the thousands of fans screaming my name.

  • Alvin: I'm not going anywhere without Da-...


    Alvin: ... -aydream believer and a homecoming queen.

    Doctor: I hope for your sake he stays asleep for the entire flight.

    Simon: Maybe we should give him another shot just to be sure.

  • Dave: [yelling over the phone] Alvin!

    Alvin: Yep, nobody does that better than him.

  • Dr. Rubin: [about her chipmunk tattoo] It was my birthday and I was like "oh the chipmunks!" So, what do you say? will you represent our school?

    Alvin: Honestly, suspension still sounds pretty good to me.

  • Dave: [to Simon] I'm counting on you.

    Alvin: Dave, wait a minute! Why is he in charge?

  • Alvin: [as Robert DeNiro] You talkin' to me? You talkin' to me? I'm the only one here, so you must be talking to me.

  • Alvin: [entering classroom for the first time] Ah, I love the smell of zitcream in the morning!

  • Alvin: [as Hannibal Lecter] I'm going crack you like an acorn and eat you for dinner with some fava beans and a nice chianti!

    Footballer: Did he say something about my father?

  • Alvin: Oh, I didn't realize I pocket-dialed 1-800-LOWLIFE.

  • Alvin: [fighting over a blanket with Simon] You might as well be rooting out truffles in the French countryside because you are in fact hogging!

  • Alvin: There's something wrong with the clock! It won't shut up! I can't sleep!


    Toby: That's the point. It's an alarm clock. It helps you wake up early in the morning.

    Alvin: Why would anyone want to wake up early?

  • Alvin: Hello, Humane Society? Yes, I need help! A man is after us! He wants to take us to a terrible place... school!

  • Alvin: Do you know what Dave would say if he were here right now?

    SimonTheodore: [screaming] Alvin!

    Alvin: Not bad, but I think it needs to come more from the belly.

  • [last lines]

    Alvin: Oh boy! I suddenly got really, really tired.

    Alvin: [laughs]

    Alvin: Good night, Dave!

    Dave: Alvin!

  • Alvin: I'd give each one of 'em a stick and, one for each one of 'em, then I'd say, 'You break that.' Course they could real easy. Then I'd say, 'Tie them sticks in a bundle and try to break that.' Course they couldn't. Then I'd say, "That bundle... that's family."

  • Sig: What do you need that grabber for, Alvin?

    Alvin: Grabbin'.

  • Alvin: Well I'm as much agin' killin' as ever, sir. But it was this way, Colonel. When I started out, I felt just like you said, but when I hear them machine guns a-goin', and all them fellas are droppin' around me... I figured them guns was killin' hundreds, maybe thousands, and there weren't nothin' anybody could do, but to stop them guns. And that's what I done.

    Maj. Buxton: Do you mean to tell me that you did it to save lives?

    Alvin: Yes sir, that was why.

    Maj. Buxton: [amazed] Well, York, what you've just told me is the most extraordinary thing of all!

  • Alvin: What we done in France, we had to do. And some as done it, didn't come back, and that kind of thing ain't for buying and selling.

  • Pastor Rosier Pile: War's way to the other side of the ocean, Alvin. Lots of things can happen before you get there. You put your trust in the Lord, and He'll look out for you.

    Alvin: I done forgot the Lord! I ain't never gonna forget him again!

  • Sergeant: Where did ya learn to shoot York?

    Alvin: Well I ain't never *learned* Sergeant! Folks back home used to say I could shoot a rifle before I was *weaned*, but they was exaggeratin' some.

    [everybody laughs]

  • Alvin: Therefore, render unto Caesar the things that are Caesar's, and unto God the things that are God's.

  • Pastor Rosier Pile: See that rock, Alvin? You've been plowin' around that rock a heap o' years.

    Alvin: Sure have!

    Pastor Rosier Pile: Did you ever think when you start plowin' yer furrows crooked, it's mighty hard to get 'em straight again?

    Alvin: I never thought on it much.

    Pastor Rosier Pile: It's that-a-way, I reckon, with other things 'sides plowin'. Satan's got ya by the shirt tail, Alvin!

  • Alvin: [warning German Major] Say, this gun touches off pretty easy!

  • [Alvin puts a handful of dirt onto a plate at the table and pushes it toward his mother]

    Mother York: That there's bottom land soil, ain't it? Queer how the folks on the bottom looks down on the folks on the top. It was always that way. No changin' it!

    Alvin: I'm gonna *get* us a piece of bottom land!

    Mother York: Your pa set out to get a piece of bottom land once. Nary a man ever tried any harder! Liked to *kill* hisself tryin'!

  • Alvin: I ain't a-goin' to war. War's killin', and the book's agin' killin! So war is agin' the book!

  • Alvin: We don't get to pick who we fall in love with, and it doesn't happen like it should.

  • Alvin: She's just so hot.

    Adam: I know how hot she is.

    Vanessa: [peeking out into the hallway] That's really sweet, thanks guys!

    Adam: Fuck you!

  • Alvin: When you're married and you do blow, try to stay away from women who want to fuck you. Even ugly women. Blow is blind, Adam. Blow is blind.

    Adam: You're an asshole.

    Alvin: But you're not. You got a good heart, Adam. Try to keep it.

  • Alvin: How long have you two been together?

    Emma: Oh, we're not.

    Adam: We're sex friends.

    Emma: Yes we are.

    Adam: Friends with benefits. Fuck buddies.

    Alvin: [surprised] Great Scott!

  • Alvin: Come on. Hit me!

    Adam: What? No. I'm not going to hit you. I don't want to hurt you.

    Alvin: You're not going to hurt me. Come on!


    Alvin: Come on, quick before I get a hernia!

  • Alvin: Let's smoke some weed!

  • Jude: Hey, do you guys mind if I ask you something?

    Alvin: She's not in rehab for drugs. It's just booze. Plus, she's a vomiter.

    Miles: A fat vomiter, which is fucking useless.

    Jude: No... just, why is Otis the leader?

  • Alvin: True love is just like a ghost - people talk about it but very few have actually seen it.

  • Alvin: There's a difference between being lonely and being alone.

  • Alvin: I was running, and then I reached the cliff, and all I know is I wanted to either fly or kill myself.

  • [first lines]

    Alvin: [about cassette tape] Hey! What are you doing?

    Lance: I was falling asleep. I thought it would be a good idea to change the station situation.

    Alvin: It wasn't. I was listening to that.

    Lance: I know, but it's boring for the rest of us. I was falling asleep doing the work.

    Alvin: So what?

    Lance: So, I wanna play this tape. I wanna play this play to get motivated and pumped up, ya know?

    Alvin: I know, I know you want to play that tape. Look, you know what, Lance, I'm not here to start a fight. That's not what I want to do. But I need to listen to my language tapes in order to become proficient and informed to the best of my abilities.

    Lance: What about the equal time agreement?

    Alvin: That doesn't apply to studies in education. The equal time boom box agreement doesn't apply in this case. That's for recreation.

    Lance: Oh, come on!

    Alvin: Hey, don't push my buttons, alright? You are not the boss here. I'm the boss. I hired you. And we have a lot of work to do. We could sit here arguing about language and music and blah, blah. But we've got a lot of work to do. A lot of lines to paint, and it's a very long road. I suggest you start the machine and keep it going.

    Lance: Alvin.

    Alvin: Yeah?

    Lance: You have your tool belt on backwards.

    [restarts the loud motor]

    Alvin: Let's just enjoy the silence.

  • Truck Driver: You know what? You shouldn't smoke.

    Alvin: Yeah, I know, it's bad for ya.

    Truck Driver: No, I mean *you* shouldn't smoke. You look stupid.

  • Lance: Hey, Alvin. If you were in a regional beauty pageant, and you were a girl, what would your special talent be?

    Alvin: Triple Jump.

  • [last lines]

    Alvin: If there was a woman in that truck - I'm not saying that there is - but if there was, would you be good to her?

    Truck Driver: HUH?

    Alvin: Would you be good to her? Would you make sure that everything is okay?

    Truck Driver: You better believe it.

    [drives away]

  • Alvin: Gonna hit it in with your hand?

  • [Lance is wanking. Alvin turns to his side]

    Lance: Alvin! Alvin!

    [No response. Lance continues wanking]

    Alvin: What?

    Lance: Never mind.

    [Turns to his side]

  • Alvin: Boy, somehow in your mind, you truly do perceive yourself as a gentleman, don't you?

  • Bowie: Well, don't you have a place a little away from the others?

    Lambert: [looking at the couple and smiling] Uh-huh, just married, ain't ya?

    Bowie: Yeah.

    Lambert: Learn that, Alvin. Just-married people like to be alone.

    Alvin: I should think so.

  • Alvin: Mr. McGland, I'm honored.

    Gowan McGland: Aw, I'm depressed. You're damn good-looking.

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