Alfredo Garcia Quotes in Demolition Man (1993)

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Alfredo Garcia Quotes:

  • John Spartan: [whispering to Lenina] Look, I don't know if you guys know it, but uh... you're out of toilet paper.

    Alfredo Garcia: [confused] Did... did you say toilet *paper*?

    Lenina Huxley: Um... they used handfuls of wadded paper back in the 20th...

    [Lenina, Alfredo, and Erwin all laugh]

    John Spartan: I'm happy that you're happy, but the place where you're supposed to have the toilet paper, you've got this little shelf with three seashells on it.

    Erwin: He doesn't know how to use the three seashells!

    [Erwin continues to laugh, then calms down]

    Erwin: I can see how that could be confusing.

  • Lenina Huxley: What you're telling me to do is violate a direct order. I'm supposed to take you back to the Cryo Prison.

    John Spartan: Listen, Huxley. I just know okay. I'm gonna find Phoenix and I'm gonna put him on ice or that's where *I'm* gonna be. After that, I'm gonna turn all of my attention to that fuckin' Cacteau.

    Lenina Huxley: Enhance your calm, John Spartan.

    John Spartan: Look, I'm tired of enhancing my calm.

    Alfredo Garcia: [Seeing Spartan opening the pod to the depths of wasteland] Wait, you're opening the pod to the depths of wasteland?

    John Spartan: The real reason why your citywide search didn't work is because Phoenix was in an area that A: You can't monitor. B: You're afraid to go down and C: You don't give a shit about. Now, I'm going to find Phoenix and I'm gonna put him in a hurt locker. So, are you coming with me, or are you gonna arrest me?

    Lenina Huxley: Okay. Let's go blow this guy.

    John Spartan: [Annoyed] Away. Blow this guy *away*?

    Lenina Huxley: Whatever.

  • John Spartan: I remember when you were a snot-nosed rookie pilot.

    Zachary Lamb - Aged: They finally grounded me.

    John Spartan: Shit! *buzz!* You were a damn good flyer. *buzz!*

    Alfredo Garcia: They seem to be friends, yet he speaks to him in the most profane manner

    Lenina Huxley: Well, if you had read my study, you would know this is how insecure heterosexual males used to bond.

  • Chief George Earle: You have apprehended the villain responsible for the murder of our beloved Dr. Raymond Cocteau?

    John Spartan: Well, I wouldn't exactly say apprehended. Let's just say he's history. And the Cryo-prison? That's history, too.

    [Chief Earle looks upon the damaged cryo-prison in disbelief]

    Chief George Earle: [confused; takes off his glasses] What will we do? How will we live?

    Edgar Friendly: I tell you what we're do. We're all gonna go out drinking, get shit-faced, and paint the town, literally. I mean graffiti, slogans. It'll be a blast.

    John Spartan: Whoa, Whoa. I'll tell you what gonna do:

    John Spartan: [to Chief Earle] Why don't you get a little dirty?

    John Spartan: [to Edgar] You a lot clean.

    John Spartan: And somewhere in the middle... I don't know. You'll figure it out.

    Alfredo Garcia: Fuckin' A!

    John Spartan: [impressed] Well put.

  • John Spartan: [to Garcia] We'll look at you. You get a bump on the noggin, and you think you're Pancho Villa?

    Alfredo Garcia: [Garcia looks confused] Who?

    John Spartan: [Spartan shaking his head] Never mind.

    Edgar Friendly: [to Spartan] Time to take a stand pal.

    John Spartan: [to Edgar] Well good. While you're doing that, loan me a gun.

    [Edgar hands Spartan a gun]

    John Spartan: Loan me two guns.

    [Wastelander hands Spartan a waste belt with a gun in it. Spartan puts the belt over his shoulder]

    Chief George Earle: [to Edgar and Wastelanders] You'de use the weapons of mass destruction against men and women who uphold the law?

    Edgar Friendly: [to Chief] We use these to shop for groceries.

Browse more character quotes from Demolition Man (1993)

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