Al Capone Quotes in Night at the Museum: Battle of the Smithsonian (2009)

Kah Mun Rah: Are there any questions?

Al Capone: Yeah, I got one. How come you're wearin' a dress?

Kah Mun Rah: This is not a dress. This is a tunic. It was the height of fashion 3,000 years ago, I assure you. Are there any other questions?

Ivan The Terrible: Da. This-a dress you're wearing, do we have to wear one of these, too?

Kah Mun Rah: Were you not listening? I just told Mr. Capone here that this not a dress. It is, in fact, a tunic. Very big difference. Are there any other questions?

[Napoleon raises his hand]

Kah Mun Rah: [getting annoyed] Are there any questions not about the dress?

[catching himself]

Kah Mun Rah: Tunic?

[Napoleon lowers his hand]

Kah Mun Rah: Good.

Larry Daley: Great, well, I'll give you the combination after you give him back!

[reaches for the tablet]

Kah Mun Rah: How dare you! If you touch that again I shall kill you right now. Do not touch this.

[makes a line in front of the hourglass with his hand]

Kah Mun Rah: This is a 'No-Touching' zone!

Larry Daley: Good, well, then...

[reaches for it]

Kah Mun Rah: Oh my GOD! I can't believe you reached across like that again! I can't even believe it! Oh, God! I want to kill you right now! If you didn't know this combination, you would be so dead right now, it would be unbelievable!

Larry Daley: Great, well, I do know the combination...

Kah Mun Rah: [making a line with his arm] DON't CROSS THIS LINE with your hand!

[Larry starts to say something]

Kah Mun Rah: How dare you! If you speak again, if you SPEAK AGAIN, I'm going to kill you! Do you understand this? Don't say it! Oh, God I see you getting ready! Oh, my GOD! Don't say anything! Now, give me that Tablet and tell me the combination.

Larry Daley: Alright, after you give me Jed and release my friends.

[reaches for the hourglass]

Kah Mun Rah: [he freaks out] You did all three! You spoke and you reached your hand across!

Larry Daley: Look, I can talk to you about this all night!

Kah Mun Rah: How about this? How about I DON'T kill you, like I really, really want to, and I give you precisely five seconds to hand over that Tablet and tell me the combination?

Al Capone: [coming in carrying Einstein] We already got the combination! It's pi. 3.14159265! This little guy sang. Oh did he sing? Like a canary!

Al Capone: [Instead of chasing Larry, he takes his shot-gun and plays "taking him down gangster style" by making bizarre shooting noises]

Ivan The Terrible: [after a blank look at Capone] Alvin, you're a moron! Your stupidity is making the hairs on the back of my thigh stand up like a Russian ballerina!

Lucky: [to the fledgeling Mafia Commission, at a meeting hosted by a young Al Capone] ... You all know how I got this scar. Maybe Joe Profaci, here...

Joe Profaci: Wait a minute. What're you saying?

Lucky: Don't worry, Joe. Maybe you knew it was gonna happen to me, maybe you didn't. But by the old way of doin' things... If I became boss now, I'd have to hit you in case you knew. And all of you shrug, except some of you are friends of Joe's. And one day I might do something that upsets you, so then you'll hit me. And then YOU'LL become boss. My friends, they'll hate you for that. Then somebody else becomes boss, and so on, and on... You know what I call that? Stupid. Very stupid... We're all bosses here.

Joe Profaci: What then, Charlie? We're gonna vote on everything?

Lucky: That's right. Everybody here... is equal.

Meyer Lansky: Corporations have a board of directors, a Commission. So will we.

Lucky: Now, I have friends. They're not from Palermo, they're not from Sicily... They're not even Italians. They're Jewish. But they're still my friends. And I trust 'em.

Al Capone: You say there's gonna be no boss, but you're startin' to talk like one.

Lucky: I've learned. Every organization needs somebody standin' out front. Call it a figurehead, a leader, a headman, a kingpin, a president, whatever. It doesn't much matter to me who does it.

Joe Profaci: I say we make Charlie Luciano head of our National Commission. Who agrees?

[Everybody at the table raises his hand... with the exception of Capone, who sits at the head of the table opposite Lucky]

Lucky: You want it, Al? It's yours.

Al Capone: No, I want you to do it. It's just that Julius Caesar never took no vote.

Lucky: That's why Julius Caesar ended up dead in the street.

[Capone raises his hand at last]

Lucky: ... Any other business?