Aide Quotes in Jonah Hex (2010)

Lieutenant Grass: Begging your pardon, sir, but why does the President care if one old Confederate general is still alive?

President Grant: After Gettysburg, Turnbull changed. He targeted hospitals, schools, churches... kill enough people, and soon they would tear down the government that failed to protect them. His Mexican slaves, they had a nickname for him... what was it?

Aide: "Terrorista."

President Grant: Terrorista.

Dr. Steckler: Let's have a look here.

[presses Luke's limp thumb to a scanner]

Dr. Steckler: Oh, look, that insurance just expired. Take him to F ward.

Aide: Oh, sorry doctor, I'm new. What's F ward?

Dr. Steckler: Severe brain trauma. No medical insurance. Give you three guesses what F stands for...

Matt Douglas: I hate these funerals. It's just awful when another good Democrat passes on.

Aide: I believe the deceased was a Republican, sir.

Matt Douglas: Oh, well, then it might not be so bad.

[an aide suggests that General Lee surrender]

Gen. Robert E. Lee: [Grasping sword] Surrender? My poor army! Why I'd rather die a thousand deaths than to do that to them.

Aide: There, there, General. You must lie down and rest.

Gen. Robert E. Lee: [Introspectively] Rest... that's a beautiful word.